JUDGE DREDD CASE FILES 20:

BOOK OF THE DEAD (progs 859-866)

 

Judge Dredd vs the Mummy!

That’s right – we’re in the highlight of Case Files 20 and arguably the entire Dark Age of Dredd from Case Files 17-23, the eight episode story arc of Book of the Dead.

I mean – it’s just good pulp horror fun. Judge Dredd vs the Mummy – what’s not to love?

It’s also our introduction to Egypt’s mega-city, Luxor – and what an introduction! The Luxor Judges may rank as yet another mega-city of villains but you have to love their uniforms – absolutely top tier, with their pharaonic chic.

Yes – it’s the usual stereotypical depiction of foreign mega-cities and doesn’t particularly make much sense as to why post-apocalyptic 22nd century Egypt and its Judges have reverted to imitating ancient pharaonic Egypt in implausible ways. Which just so happens to include an actual supernatural Mummy. But when it looks this good – who cares?

It helps that it is illustrated throughout by artist Dermot Power, with some of his best art – or indeed, some of the best art featured in the Judge Dredd comic.

Don’t worry too much about the paper-thin plot and its tenuous premise of Dredd’s diplomatic exchange with Luxor. Like any good horror film, it’s all just part of the ride to get to what we all came to see in the first place – the showdown between Judge Dredd and the Mummy. Indeed, as we learn in something of the twist – spoiler alert – Dredd’s whole diplomatic exchange was set up at its Luxor end for that very purpose. Of course, that just raises further questions but just go with it, okay?

So strap in for eight episodes of glorious art and your ride, courtesy of Morrison and Millar, to yet another showdown between Dredd and the undead. We’ve seen him take on zombies in Judgement Day, various forms of vampires (although technically none of them so far have been of the supernatural undead variety), and the Dark Judges who are arguably a form of lich. Now it’s time for Dredd to meet his Mummy.

 

 

JUDGE DREDD CASE FILES 20:

BOOK OF THE DEAD 1 (progs 859)

 

“I am Rameses, scourge of criminals and nemesis of the lawless.”

Here’s the introduction to Egypt’s mega-city Luxor – or more precisely its Judges. Luxor itself will have to wait until a little later in the episode.

As I said, you have to love those Luxor Judge uniforms – absolutely top tier with their pharaonic chic. In fact, I’m calling it now – I’m ranking them just below the Sovs in my mega-city Judge uniform rankings.

Dermot Powers’ art is on full display in this opening episode – so much so that I’m going to slow down and go almost panel by panel, firstly because of that gorgeous art and secondly because of the key story details in this episode. We’ll pick up the pace after this episode to the more usual panel per episode (or thereabouts) in the balance of the story arc.

As for that introduction, Dredd is literally dropped off in Luxor – “Judge Dredd, on board a Mega-City One Justice Department shuttle, has just landed at the north African city of Luxor, part of a cultural exchange program instigated by Chief Judge McGruder.”

Well, firstly, technically he hasn’t landed at Luxor but presumably their airport or spaceport facility some way from the city proper, as it is announced later. Secondly, McGruder seems to be coming up with all sorts of crazy plans lately – the Mechanismo project, that business initiative which gave us Roadkill in the preceding storyline, and now this cultural exchange. Of course, there’s method to her madness here – after their clash over the Mechanismo debacle, McGruder is keen to keep Dredd out of the city. Despite a reputation that seems to be worldwide, Dredd is not the best pick for cultural exchange or diplomacy.

And he gets quite the curt introduction to Rameses, apparently Luxor’s best Judge who is being exchanged with Dredd in Mega-City One for the week – and chose to take it personally. As we see at the conclusion of the story arc, he takes it quite a bit more than that. Judge Kamun is much friendlier – “I welcome you to Egypt with a joyful heart”.

Despite that friendly face, let’s just say that I don’t know how Kamun’s heart would fare against a feather on those divine scales of justice in Egyptian mythology…

 

 

 

JUDGE DREDD CASE FILES 20:

BOOK OF THE DEAD 1 (prog 859)

 

“Halt, sinner!

Be thankful I only took an arm, thief! Next time, I will not be so merciful!”

 

As I said, this first episode has one awesome art panel by Dermot Power after another – and they also set up so much of the later story or atmosphere of Luxor – that one almost has to go panel by panel. And yes – I know these are technically two panels!

And this sets up the Luxor Judges as another mega-city of villains comparable to Ciudad Baranquilla in corruption and casual brutality. Sigh – their uniforms might rank as top tier but their quality of life rankings is going down to fail-tier on a par with Ciudad Baranquilla.

I mean, Mega-City One Judges are trigger-happy but at least they don’t amputate arms. Although I suppose that puts the Luxor Judges up there with the limb-lopping lightsaber-happy Jedi.

And…is Judge Kamun just going to leave the criminal walk away to wander the streets without any sort of administration of justice or even patching him up? Does he at least get to pick up his arm? Is the penalty for petty theft – it was an apple from a street stall – really amputation? I’d prefer the cubes in Mega-City One.

As usual Dredd can’t resist a dry quip – “spare the rod?” – although I wouldn’t have picked him as one for Biblical or really any literary allusion, as in “spare the rod and spoil the child”.

 

 

 

 

JUDGE DREDD CASE FILES 20:

BOOK OF THE DEAD 1 (prog 859)

 

Well, I guess there goes that sarcastic pun about denial is not a river in Egypt, since the Nile is no longer a river in Egypt either.

Some nice Judge Dredd casual worldbuilding here in Book of the Dead, courtesy of a tight script and Dermott Powers’ art of the Luxor aircraft – nicely resembling ancient Egyptian art of a solar barque of the gods in design – as it overflies the canyon that “used to be the Nile”.

Used to be, that is, until the Atomic Wars “dried up its source”. Luxor “now pumps its water from hidden wells deep beneath the ground”.

Whoa – does that accord with the actual geology of Egypt? A cursory Google search suggests there might be something to it, but I suspect nothing close to the Nile itself.

And come on – who nuked the Nile? Can you nuke a river at source? I know the Atomic Wars were all out – but it still seems a frivolous use of nuclear warheads to little purpose. Who had it out for Egypt like that? Of course, it could be the sweeping environmental effects of global nuclear war – although that begs the question of whatever causing it was big enough to dry up the Nile…but leave the urban centers and population of Egypt unaffected enough to form a mega-city.

 

 

 

JUDGE DREDD CASE FILES 20:

BOOK OF THE DEAD 1 (prog 859)

 

 

“One of the four wonders of the modern world…the city of Luxor.”

 

Dredd is unimpressed by the sights of the canyon formerly known as the Nile, sneering from the corner of his mouth – “I’m not here to see the sights, Judge Kamun.”

You’d better get used to Dredd curling up the corner of this mouth to sneer in this storyline.

Judge Kamun tells Dredd he’s just warming up to the main attraction – “But up ahead is the greatest sight of all, my friend”.

Enter the glorious art panel of the city of Luxor, with Kamun’s line about it being one of the four wonders of the modern world.

But what are the other three?! Inquiring minds want to know! No, seriously – as far as I know, they have never elaborated on those other three wonders in the comic. I’d like to think Mega-City One has at least one of them.

And yes – the whole city appears to be under some sort of pyramid, whether of glass or the futuristic plastics they have in the twenty-second century (boing or plasteen among others), or perhaps some energy force shield. They never elaborate on it either.

The episode wraps up with another Luxor Judge on street patrol, Judge Khafre, being ambushed by a shadowy ghoulish figure – although we see enough of its bandaged arms to assume it’s that classic Egyptian undead stereotype, the Mummy. Conveniently, while the Mummy is chowing down on one of Khafre’s arms – which it appears to have torn off – it’s within eyesight of Dredd arriving into Luxor with Kamun. And strangely, it not only seems to know who Dredd is, but is also enthused to sibilance upon seeing him – “Yesss, Dredd…yessss”.

It’s nice to know that Dredd is so famous he’s known among the undead of Luxor.

 

 

 

 

JUDGE DREDD CASE FILES 20:

BOOK OF THE DEAD 2 (prog 860)

 

Whatever else you think of Luxor, you have to admit they have the most pimped out Chief Judge. The tiger really ties the room together.

Although to be honest, they might have gone a little too far with the whole pharaoh thing they’ve got going. I also would have thought that tigers were extinct in Dredd’s post-apocalyptic 22nd century.

Anyway, you’d also be forgiven for not thinking very much of Luxor, at least in terms of the quality of life for its citizens, placing it down there with Ciudad Baranquilla, the most dystopian of mega-cities in the twenty-second century.

They’re doing much better in terms of the preservation of Egypt’s ancient monuments, as we see the Great Pyramid and Sphinx at Giza – even if the latter is used as Luxor’s prison. Or more precisely, the maze beneath the Sphinx is used as the prison, although they execute the prisoners anyway after serving their terms.

Wait – there’s a maze under the Sphinx?! Looking it up, I found out that there was a legendary Hall of Records or library purported to exist somewhere underground near the Sphinx – and by legendary, I mean a modern legend apparently originating with American “clairvoyant”, Edgar Cayce. I guess Luxor decided to build it.

While looking that up, I also found out the Sphinx was built for Pharaoh Khafre – the namesake of the Luxor Judge killed by the Mummy at the end of the first episode. I’d note that Judge Kamun, Dredd’s Luxor escort, has a similar hame to Khamun – as the suffix of Tutenkhamun, which I understand to be derived from the god Amun.

Speaking of Kamun, he tells Dredd as they walk through the citizens of Luxor – seemingly left out of Luxor’s twenty-second century technology as they look much the same as contemporary Egyptians – “Look at the fear in the eyes of our citizens. The respect they show us. They know that even the wrong kind of look will mean a public flogging”.

So there you go – even looking at a Judge in Luxor wrong gets you a flogging.

Judge Kamun continues in the same vein as they enter what appears to be Luxor’s Grand Hall of Justice, resembling a palace or temple in ancient Egypt with the apt inscription He Who Weighs the Heart of Men – “There is no conflict in Luxor. There is only blind obedience.”

Kamun escorts Dredd to Luxor’s Chief Judge Giza (sigh) – although the lazy name is more than made up for by that art panel of the pimped out Chief Judge. Pimped out like a pharaoh, that is, down to a male and female servant whose only role appears to be sitting at the pharaoh’s feet to show how, ah, pharaohly the pharaoh is. The same goes for the tiger but it is a tiger after all – pretty cool.

Chief Judge Giza tells Dredd that something is rotten in the state of Luxor. We know this having seen the Mummy chowing down on a Luxor Judge, but the Chief Judge tells us that this is only one of many Judges killed by this undead thing. Indeed, thirteen as Chief Judge Giza tells Dredd.

Ah, better make that fifteen as the episode wraps up. Two Luxor Judges find what appears to be a pile of rags – but you guessed it, that pile of rags is the Mummy, although it’s not clear whether he was taking a nap or setting a trap.

And of course he chows down on them too. Or is that two? Or, for that matter, slurps them down – “Juicezzz! I need your juicezzz! Need to drink themm…and mmake me ssstronnng!”

Although that “juices” thing may be some unfortunate phrasing…

 

 

 

JUDGE DREDD CASE FILES 20:

BOOK OF THE DEAD 3 (prog 861)

 

Judge Dredd vs the Mummy: Round 1

I’m going to call this round a draw.

This episode opens with Judge Dredd and Luxor Judge finding the corpses – sucked dry – of the two Luxor Judges killed in the last episode. That description of sucked dry was used by Chief Judge Giza for the other thirteen Judges killed by the Mummy – which was somewhat surprising as when we saw it killing Luxor Judge Khafre, it appeared to actually eat one of his limbs.

Anyway, the Mummy has a bigger target in mind – indeed, the biggest. No, not Dredd – at least not yet, as foreshadowed by the Mummy apparently recognizing Dredd on seeing him – but Chief Judge Giza.

Either from a sense of opportunity, or dare I say it, toilet humor, the Mummy targets Chief Judge Giza in the most undignified position possible – on his throne. No, not his royal throne – that other throne of toilet slang. Nice gag though of Chief Judge Giza thinking the Mummy’s bandages were toilet paper being passed under the door at his request.

Needless to say, the Mummy makes quick work of Giza – and the two Anubis-like Judges standing guard outside the stall beforehand, although you only see their slain corpses in passing.

Fortunately, Dredd and Kamun are in the vicinity – although it’s not clear why, other than plot convenience – and overhear Giza’s screams coming from the Chief Judge’s quarters. They arrive at the scene in time for the first round between Dredd and the Mummy, as Dredd takes an incendiary shot at the Mummy as it runs away.

The Mummy turns back and gets a blow in as Dredd’s about to up the ante with a high-ex shot, throwing Dredd out the window for that cinematic cliché of Dredd’s fall being broken by successive canopies.

Dredd calls out (from the ground floor stall where he landed in a pallet of fruit or vegetables) for Kamun to pursue the Mummy – but Kamun replies “It’s too late, Judge Dredd. The beast has escaped!”

Hmm – something seems to be not quite right going on here…

 

 

JUDGE DREDD CASE FILES 20:

BOOK OF THE DEAD 4 (prog 862)

 

In Luxor, they even pimp out their resyk in pharaonic style.

I love how they threw a camel in there.

I can’t imagine there’d be many camels in Luxor but there’s one on the Luxor resyk conveyor for you.

And shame on you, Dredd, for that stereotypical crack – “Always figured the Egyptians would wrap their stiffs in bandages. As Kamun corrects him, “only the rich are allowed to be mummified…the rich and senior judges”.

In Luxor, resyk is for the plebs and proles – “the ordinary citizens” as Kamun calls them. Although you have to love the Luxor resyk motto, that they recycle “everything but the scream”.

 

 

 

JUDGE DREDD CASE FILES 20:

BOOK OF THE DEAD 4 (prog 862)

 

Luxor sending out its Chief Judge in sarcophagus style.

As Judge Kamun tells Dredd, “Our Chief Judge will be sent to the afterlife with all the ceremony his rank demands”.

Although I’ve nicknamed this story as essentially Dredd vs the Mummy, I suppose technically Dredd does see more than one mummy in it. Chief Judge Giza’s mummy is a lot less lively than the main Mummy though.

It is somewhat jarring that the 22nd century Egyptian megalopolis has reverted to much to its ancient predecessor – including mummification of its rich citizens and senior Judges, even more so that this is presided over by its “Tek”-Judges. (Tek being the more simplified phonetic spelling adopted in the 22nd century for tech, itself abbreviated from technology – not unlike resyk for recycling).

There have been some advances – as Kamun tells Dredd, “In ancient times, the mummification process took seventy days” but “now the whole ceremony is over in a matter of minutes”.

Why, though, since the story painstakingly shows the steps of the process that seems essentially the same as in ancient times? It seems a missed opportunity to have shown robots doing it.

Luxor even has revived the sacrificial interment of servants with the mummy of Chief Judge Giza – as an “honor guard” of “the Tek Judges of Anubis”. As Judge Kamun intones, “the Chief Judge will need servants when he awakens in the afterlife’ – which just strikes me even more that this whole mummy business should be done with robots.

Dredd is unimpressed as he accompanies Kamun for the funerary ceremony – “You don’t believe all this superstitious stuff, do you?”

What impresses me is that Chief Judge Giza is being interred in a pyramid – and indeed, one of the old pyramids, not a new one that Luxor has built for its Chief Judges. That seems to beg the question of how much room is there in those old pyramids for new mummies and their sacrificial guards? Do they just toss the old mummies out?

Dredd tells Kamun that he “feels kinda out of place here, Kamun” as they attend the funerary chamber. Kamun reassures him while standing behind him with a distinctly unnerving grin “Please, do not feel uncomfortable here, Judge Dredd. You are our guest of honor!”

Well, that’s unsettling. That choice of phrase – and Kamun’s slasher smile – bode nothing but trouble for Dredd. And sure enough – trouble is only two panels away…

 

 

 

 

JUDGE DREDD CASE FILES 20:

BOOK OF THE DEAD 4 (prog 862)

 

Things go pyramid-shaped as Dredd is betrayed and laid out as meat for the Mummy.

No, seriously.

“I wanted you here as meat! Sustenance for my master! A feast for he who will never die!”

That’s said by Judge Kamun after he’s zapped Dredd in the back with his Luxor lawgiver rod – phrasing! – but it may as well have been said by the writers Millar and Morrison themselves.

As I said in my introduction to this story at the outset, its paper-thin plot and tenuous premise is all contrived for the showdown between Judge Dredd and the Mummy. And here we learn the big twist – Dredd’s whole diplomatic exchange was set up by Judge Kamun at its Luxor end for that very purpose.

Yes – it has been foreshadowed through Kamun’s shady conduct throughout, most of all the Mummy’s convenient “escape” after its first round with Dredd, but also his constant smile that bordered on predatory grin. We got a good example of that smile at its most predatory as Kamun reassured Dredd about the latter being their guest of honor.

It was also foreshadowed in the very first episode as the Mummy spied on Kamun escorting Dredd into Luxor – when the Mummy not only seemed to know who Dredd was, but was also enthused to see him, as if the Mummy had been expecting him.

However, as I also said in my introduction, it all raises further questions. We’ll get to more of them in the next expository episode but for now Judge Kamun monologues to Dredd – while the latter is unconscious because Kamun just can’t help himself gloating – that he had “brought” Dredd here.

Here – as in the pyramid, for Chief Judge Giza’s funerary ceremony? Or to Luxor itself? Given what we learn next episode, Kamun is in league with the Mummy, essentially playing the role of Renfield to its Dracula, one would assume the latter – and that the Mummy killing Chief Judge Giza was setting it up.

Although that would imply that Kamun was in a position to pull strings to orchestrate a diplomatic exchange of Judges between Luxor and Mega-City One – that or a senior Luxor Judge or Judges in positions of power also in conspiracy with the Mummy – and also for himself to be the Judge assigned to Dredd in Luxor. However, the story itself doesn’t tell us that.

Also, lucky for Luxor that they happened to get Dredd himself from Mega-City One. Of course, Dredd is Justice Department’s most iconic figure, both in Mega-City One itself and in the 22nd century world, but that makes Dredd being picked for the exchange rather than any other Judge in Mega-City One rather remote. Of course, Chief Judge McGruder has issues with Dredd at this time and prefers to assign him on missions outside the city – but did Kamun or his co-conspirators know that? Or was it just more luck?

Anyway, as usual, the art is outstanding throughout, including the final panel of the Mummy lurching towards the pyramid to dine on Dredd. To quote the poet Keats, who are these coming to the sacrifice?

 

 

 

JUDGE DREDD CASE FILES 20:

BOOK OF THE DEAD 5 (prog 863)

 

“Drokk!”

Says it all really – like sands sealing the pyramid, so are the days of Dredd’s life…

Things aren’t looking too good for Dredd in this final panel, about to be buried alive by the sand sealing the pyramid to entomb the Chief Judge. It’s also the same fate as that for the Tek Judges as sacrificial attendants for Chief Judge Giza in the afterlife.

They at least have taken poison for a painless death before being swallowed up by sand, but it does lead to a nice exchange with Dredd as he looks for a way out of the pyramid chamber only to be told there is none – “What? Are you people crazy?”

In short, yes – for this insane level of verisimilitude in imitating ancient Egypt but that’s about to get worse.

But wait a minute, I hear you say – wasn’t Dredd zapped into unconsciousness as Kamun’s captive on the menu for the Mummy? How did he escape?

Well, this is the final panel of the episode, which indeed open with Dredd in chains as Kamun’s captive for the Mummy. As to how he escaped, Dredd did it like he always does – with an apparently superhuman feat of strength to break his chains, killing Kamun and an unnamed co-conspirator Luxor Judge.

But not before Kamun gives Dredd an exposition dump on the Mummy. Kamun tells Dredd that while most of the city follow the one god Yud – presumably like Grud for God, 2000 AD’s publication-friendly way of referring to Allah – he is part of a cabal following the “old gods…those ancient beast-faced gods”. Within this cabal, there were legends of “the return of a dreadful redeemer…Ankhhor, the dead-in-life, who found a method whereby his physical body could survive beyond death”.

You guessed it – that’s the Mummy. And luckily, Luxor dug him up. Yes, literally – when drilling for Luxor’s subterranean water. “I made sure I was part of the team of Judges sent down to investigate”.

And to fully restore himself, Ankhhor needs to suck Dredd’s ka. No, get your minds out of the gutter – his ka, “the genetic essence of men”, which sounds a lot different (and awfully advanced) for what I understood to be the ancient Egyptian concept of ka as the soul (or one of them anyway).

Which begs a lot of questions of why Dredd is contrived as the missing piece of the puzzle for an ancient undead entity to revive itself, even if he is one of Justice Department’s finest clones – but just go with it, okay?

Anyway, back to the final panel, time is running out – or rather the sand is running in – for Dredd…

 

 

 

 

JUDGE DREDD CASE FILES 20:

BOOK OF THE DEAD 6 (prog 864)

 

Dredd vs the Mummy – Round 2!

Nice of Ankhhor to save Dredd from being smothered by sand in the burial chamber first.

Of course, if you had just waited a little longer, Ankhhor, Dredd probably would have been smothered into unconsciousness and not put up a fight.

I suspect Ankhhor couldn’t risk Dredd dying as he has to suck Dredd’s ka au naturel as it were. No, not that – phrasing! – ka means soul or one of them anyway, as ancient Egyptian mythology had numerous soul components

It doesn’t matter since Book of the Dead adapts ka as genetic essence – which seems remarkably well informed for an ancient undead entity. It’s also why Ankkhor wants to suck Dredd’s sweet cloned genetic Judda juice. Hey – phrasing!

Anyway, Dredd literally headbutts Ankhhor and escapes through the passage from which Ankhhor burst into the burial chamber, before escaping the pyramid entirely with an Indiana Jones roll under the stone door sealing off the pyramid (until the next Chief Judge burial, I guess).

There’s a nice double take as Dredd thinks to himself that the stone door will stop Ankhhor for some time at least, but Ankkhor just bursts through it anyway – “I have waited three thousand years to be reborn as the lord of all the earth. Give me your fleshh!”

Eww.

Also – three thousand? It’s 2115 – so that would mean Ankhhor mummified himself in…885 BC or so. Well after the peak of ancient Egypt and well into its decline, shortly before being conquered by the Assyrians, Babylonians and Persians.

Dredd hits Ankhhor with a blast from Kamun’s rod – phrasing! At least, I’m presuming it’s Kamun’s rod but it would have to be a spare one as Kamun and his rod are back in the pyramid, after Dredd choked him out – hey, phrasing! It could be one that Luxor lent Dredd but the storyline made a point of Dredd using his own Lawgiver and its ammunition.

Dredd then flies away on one of those Luxor Lawmaster sky-chariot things that was outside the pyramid. I’m also presuming that it’s Kamun’s sky-chariot Dredd takes. Luxor definitely lent him one of those as we see him flying it side by side with Kamun to the pyramid for the burial, but the storyline seems to have forgotten that as we only see one sky-chariot outside the pyramid. If there were still two of them, Anhkhor could also have simply flown the other one after Dredd instead of leaping on the one flown by Dredd.

Fortunately for Ankhhor, he obviously was the long jump champion of ancient Egypt and makes the leap. Unfortunately for both of them, he and Dredd are thrown clear and fall from the chariot as they struggle over the Luxor skyline.

 

 

JUDGE DREDD CASE FILES 20:

BOOK OF THE DEAD 7 (prog 865)

 

“Grud! Guess I oughtta be grateful for the soft landing” Dredd’s got guts as he ends up in one of the worst parts of Luxor’s resyk.

Well, that was lucky – as was not being too high up that the intestinal soft-landing doesn’t injure or kill him.

That luck doesn’t last as Ankhhor plunges into the guts after him…

 

 

 

JUDGE DREDD CASE FILES 20:

BOOK OF THE DEAD 7 (prog 865)

 

“In defiance of death and all the ancient godsss of judgement, I will live again and rule! YOU ARE SSSIMPLY FOOD!”

Ankhhor explaining the rules in Round 3 of Dredd vs the Mummy – or the continuation of Round 2. It’s a little hard to tell – he’s worse than the Terminator and absolutely will not stop ever until he’s devoured Dredd’s ka.

Note to self – I really should do a list of antagonists Dredd has faced which see him as only food. There’s probably enough for a top ten – Ankhhor for one, but I can think of Satanus, the Black Plague spiders, and Nosferatu off the top of my head…

Anyway, back to Round 3 of Dredd vs the Mummy, it doesn’t start off too well for Dredd. The chain we see Ankhhor pulling here is connected to the gangway Dredd is on, breaking the gangway – and Dredd’s arm as he falls to the resyk conveyor belt.

Which prompts to mind the saying about costing an arm and a leg – as Ankhhor soon adds a broken leg to Dredd’s broken arm as Round 3 continues.

The episode closes out with things not looking too good for Dredd – with Ankhhor crouched over Dredd and poised to suck Dredd’s ka or life-force. Of course, being a comic, Ankkor can’t resist monologuing about sucking Dredd’s ka – and showing his surprising knowledge of genetics for a three thousand year old undead entity who has spent almost all of that time in a sarcophagus.

“I can almost tasste the honeydew of chromosomes, genes, the rich wine of your being”.

Which begs the question of why Ankhhor is almost tasting it as opposed to, you know, just tasting it rather than talking about it.

 

 

JUDGE DREDD CASE FILES 20:

BOOK OF THE DEAD 8 (prog 866)

 

“See, I figure there’s only one way to stop someone who can’t die. The Resyk way”

Would it work, though? An automated assembly line breaking down a body into its organic or even chemical components would seem hard to beat for killing an undead entity like the Mummy – or your average lich or vampire for that matter.

But what if the Mummy can regenerate from that? Luckily again for Dredd, it seems the Mummy can’t – but things might have been different if, say, it could regenerate from a single cell, like Junji Ito’s Tomie. Now there’s a match-up I’d like to see!

Wait, I see you say, what happened? We closed out the last episode with Ankkhor poised in victory over Dredd, the latter with a broken arm and leg.

Well, Dredd uses his good arm to pull out Ankkhor’s tongue in a scene I was sorely tempted to feature here – and then his good leg to kick Ankkhor into the automated resyk mechanism that dissects bodies into their components, hence my feature line and image.

And Dredd wins Round 3 – and the match – against the Mummy by resyk knockout.

Of course, it would have been more satisfying if Dredd’s victory had been less by chance than design – the happenstance that he and Ankhhor fell into Luxor’s resyk plant, rather than, say, Dredd deliberately luring Ankhhor to it. If they had fallen anywhere else, then Dredd would have been toast with his broken arm and leg. Having already quipped about Ankkhor as the Terminator, I suppose it’s not unlike the happenstance showdown of the automated assembly line at the end of the first film (or the smelting plant of the second film).

 

 

JUDGE DREDD CASE FILES 20:

BOOK OF THE DEAD 8 (prog 866)

 

“Shut it down! In the name of Grud, shut it down!”

These anonymous Luxor resyk workers don’t get enough credit as the true heroes of the story saving Dredd.

Dredd may have won his match against the Mummy – but it’s out of the frying pan and into the fire as Dredd is dragged into the same resyk automated mechanism that dissected the Mummy to its destruction.

Fortunately, the Luxor resyk workers overhear his cries for help and shut down the mechanism – which is particularly impressive as they don’t speak English and apparently ‘wake-up’ cases occur enough that the workers usually ignore them. Amusingly though, the note to the panel has “translated from the Egyptian” when it should be Arabic.

That wraps up Book of the Dead (except for a few panels effectively by way of epilogue). I also can’t help but think that Dredd’s quote reflected the reaction of fans to this story – as well as Morrison and Millar writing Dredd in general – at the time.

I can see where they’re coming from but I like Book of the Dead – as well as odd moments of Morrison and Millar writing Dredd – if only for Dredd vs the Mummy and Dermot Power’s sumptuous art of Luxor’s 22nd century retrofuturistic version of ancient Egypt.

 

 

JUDGE DREDD CASE FILES 20:

BOOK OF THE DEAD 8 (prog 866)

 

“What’s the matter, Rameses? Cut yourself shaving?”

And Dredd sees out the epilogue to Book of the Dead with his usual one-liners.

I suppose arguably that would make Rameses the third “mummy” Dredd encountered in this storyline, at least in appearance – the actual Mummy Ankhhor, the mummified corpse of Chief Judge Giza (killed by Ankhhor), and now the heavily bandaged Rameses.

Rameses was of course the Luxor Judge trading places with Dredd for this cultural exchange – I guess the streets of Mega-City One are tougher than Luxor. What puzzles me is how Dredd got speed-healing and Rameses didn’t – Dredd broke an arm and a leg during his fight with Ankhhor.

Also – I’m digging Hershey’s appearance here. Dredd of course has another characteristic one-liner to her asking him what happened with Luxor trying to feed him to one of their gods – “I didn’t agree with him. Now how about pointing me in the direction of some real action?”

And that’s a wrap on Dredd vs the Mummy in Book of the Dead.

 

 

 

 

JUDGE DREDD CASE FILES 20

Mega-City One 2115-2116

(1993-1994: progs 856-887 / Megazine 2.44-2.56)

 

We’re still in the darkest part of the Dark Age of Dredd (as written by Morrison and Millar) but there is one bright shining light in Case Files 20 – perhaps the brightest shining light in the entire Dark Age or Case Files 17-23.

I am of course talking about The Book of the Dead, the standout story arc in this volume or any other in the Dark Age.

It’s Judge Dredd vs the Mummy! What’s not to love?

It’s also our introduction to Egypt’s mega-city, Luxor – and what an introduction! The Luxor Judges may rank as yet another mega-city of villains but you have to love their uniforms – absolutely top tier, with their pharaonic chic.

It helps that it is illustrated throughout by artist Dermot Power, with some of his best art – or indeed, some of the best art featured in the Judge Dredd comic, up there with Brian Bolland. Hmm…note to self – compile my Top 10 Judge Dredd Artists.

Sadly, the same can’t be said of The Sugar Beat, the other exotic story arc introducing Dredd to another foreign mega-city – the Pan-Andes Conurb.

The Pan-Andes Conurb and its Judges had much potential – even if the latter were essentially just glorified security guards for the criminal sugar cartels – but instead that potential is squandered by what is arguably the laziest and most blatant stereotyping in the Judge Dredd comic. And we’re talking about that period of time in the comic’s history when stereotyping was most on the nose – after all, they had a Sov Judge named Traktorfaktori.

We’re talking literal flies buzzing about the Pan-Andes Conurb Judges – which is more the pity as they actually have one of the better uniform designs of foreign mega-city Judges, with condors instead of the eagles used in Mega-City One uniforms.

Now we get it – the Pan-Andes Conurb Judges are meant to be in the same casually brutal and corrupt category as the Judges of the only other surviving South American mega-city, Ciudad Baranquilla, the latter otherwise mimicking Mega-City One in their use of eagles in design. However, at least the Ciudad Baranquilla Judges have a genuine edge of menace and cunning to them, not to mention get some sly digs in at Mega-City One’s expense whenever there are dealings between the two mega-cities. The Pan-Andes Conurb Judges are just pathetic – literally fat and lazy in the case of their Chief Judge, seemingly in perpetual siesta but for when they are roused by corruption.

One wonders how these bozos survived Judgement Day when Ciudad Baranquilla just barely scraped by – and the two other South American mega-cities, Brazilia and South-Am City, went under and got nuked.

There are some other middling arcs and episodes, with points of interest but nothing to write home about – although enough to do brief recaps or reviews.

For arcs or stories of more than one episode, there’s the opening arc in Roadkill – but I’ll also briefly stop in on Frankenstein Division, The Manchu Candidate and Scales of Justice.

For episodes, we’ll have stopovers at Crime Prevention and Top Gun. However, as in Case Files 19, the Megazine stepped in with the standout episode – It’s a Dreddful Life.

 

 

JUDGE DREDD CASE FILES 20:

ROADKILL (prog 856-858)

 

Judge Dredd does a combination of Christine and, um, Robocar?

Yes – that’s a play on Robocop. I stand by my opinion – and I understand not only my opinion – that Robocop was inspired by Judge Dredd. However, in this particular story arc of three episodes, instead of putting a dead police officer’s brain (and what’s left of his body) into the titular cyborg, it’s putting a dead criminal’s brain into a car’s automated guidance system.

As you might guess, it does not work out too well.

The set-up for the plot involves elderly citizen Merv Whitstable due for his statutory eye test to retain his driving licence. Dredd pulls him over for a traffic violation (and gives him sixty days in an iso-cube). Dredd also advises him to use his nest egg savings to “invest in a new pair of eyes”.

Dredd would know of course – he’s had his own bionic eyes since losing his original organic eyes from gruesome injury all the way back in City of The Damned in Case Files 8 (nine years earlier in both episode publication time and in-universe time).

Although it is a little puzzling that 22nd century medicine has not extended people’s health more – as his licence indicates when Dredd pulls him over, Merv is 73, which you’d think would perhaps be comparable to someone a decade younger in our time. For comparison, Dredd is 54 at the time of this episode – and he’s in robust health. (It’s a little complicated – Dredd was “born” in 2066, but by virtue of acceleration during “gestation” in the cloning process was physically and mentally five years of age at “birth”).

There is a nice gag that Dredd could tell Merv’s eyesight was bad because Merv drove into a Justice Department vehicle park.

Unfortunately, his eyesight has deteriorated to the point he can’t pass the eyesight test for a driving licence. Instead of bionic eyes, his car dealer – who also strangely conducted the eyesight test and renews his licence – sells him and his wife the robo-car, or “living brain guidance system”.

And you guessed it – because they had limited money to spend, the dealer fobbed them off a “living brain guidance system” using a dead criminal’s brain. He’s nice enough to introduce himself to them – and for some reason is able to replicate his former face on their monitor – as Lenny-Lee Lucas, who we later learn was known as the Karaoke Killer, “part-time runner for the White Lotus Triad”.

“An’ boy-oh-boy…does ol’ Lenny have some scores to settle!”

For someone who finds himself posthumously as a car automatic guidance system, Lenny adapts quickly to his situation – with his first stop almost literally a pitstop at a local mechanical body shop to pimp out Merv’s modest vehicle (by holding one of their mechanics as hostage at, ah, bonnet-point against a wall, threatening to crush him). All this while holding Merv and his wife captive in their own car.

And by pimp out, I mean equip with wings and weapons, including missiles – which I’m not sure would have been part of the inventory of the average body shop, but then it is Mega-City One. As the Judge investigating the strange hold-up tells Dredd, the vehicle “demanded a full systems conversion and armaments fit-up” – which makes the latter sound relatively routine.

The investigating Judge also fills Dredd on the background as to how Lenny-Lee’s brain ended up in the car – “Vehicle is equipped with a Quantrak auto-pilot. Uses brains from repeat offenders. Med-Division supplies ’em straight from the slabs”.

As Dredd dryly asks, “whose bright idea was that?”

Apparently, it was Chief Judge McGruder’s as part of her business initiative for closer cooperation with private enterprise. In fairness, “the brains are wiped and reprogrammed from scratch. We got a 100% success rate. Well, we did have, up till today”.

It’s always that one glitch that ruins it. Anyway, Lenny-Lee is out for revenge on the Triad that left him out to dry – and die – on a botched organ bank job. You know how it goes – he essentially goes all Christine on them. Yes – that’s a reference to Stephen King’s demonic car of that name. Except Lenny-Lee likes to sing twentieth century songs as he kills people – hence his karaoke killer moniker.

Dredd apprehends Lenny the hard way – entangled by an anti-personnel net on the vehicle windscreen, he manages to extricate himself and cling long enough to the airborne vehicle in order to literally pull Lenny’s organic brain out the guidance system. Or as Dredd says, “time I got my hands dirty”.

So Dredd effectively kills Lenny for the second time but was injured by Lenny’s attempts to shake him – although not too badly by the standards of Dredd’s misadventures. It’s enough to wonder how he does maintain his robust health at his age.

Merv’s wife does less well – as in dead from cardiac arrest while held captive by Lenny. Merv himself does marginally better – paralysed from the neck down. My biggest problem with the story arc is that Dredd arrests him as “accessory to about thirty major variations” because the vehicle was registered in his name. I know Justice Department in general and Judge Dredd in particular are heavy-handed in their police state, but this just doesn’t seem to sit right – given that Dredd knows exactly what happened. Normally Dredd would target the dealer who sold Merv the automatic guidance system as the accessory or for criminal negligence – possibly even Subaro Autopods that holds the exclusive contract, or the Med-Division staff who supplied them.

To be blunt, Merv and his wife out of all the people involved were innocent victims – indeed, the only innocent victims as the people Lenny actually killed were Triad mobsters. Not to mention that Dredd used Lenny to lead him to the Triad gangsters who otherwise had eluded Justice Department.

Some names dropped not so much for blocks as for apartments – Arcudi for Merv’s residence, possibly a reference to comic writer John Arcudi, best known for his work on The Mask, which this story arc seems to invoke at times. Also – sigh – Sax Rohmer, author of the Fu Manchu books, for the Triad kingpin’s residence.

 

JUDGE DREDD CASE FILES 20: BOOK OF THE DEAD (prog 859-866) has its own page.

 

 

 

 

JUDGE DREDD CASE FILES 20:

FRANKENSTEIN DIVISION (progs 868-871)

I Hate Christmas (prog 867)

 

“An unholy amalgam of the Sov Judges who died in the Apocalypse War, Project X is the ultimate Judge with one mission in life…”

There – I’ve saved you actually reading the four episodes of Frankenstein Division.

I suppose I have to mention this story because once you see it you can’t unsee it but as you can tell, I’m not a fan.

You can guess the premise from the title and my feature quote – some weird Soviet project to create a Super-Judge from the best body parts of Sov Judges killed in the Apocalypse War. Which serves as something of a metaphor for writer Mark Millar picking over the pieces of the Apocalypse War to stitch together this monstrosity. At least when Garth Ennis warmed up his leftovers of the Apocalypse War, you very much had the impression he was a fan of the epic.

Not so much here. It makes no sense, not even as a weird play on Frankenstein. The Sov Judges who oversaw the project – Yeltsin and Andropov (sigh) – explain it to Chief Judge McGruder and Dredd.

But first – Yeltsin can’t even get the Apocalypse War right when fawning over Dredd. “It’s an honour to meet you, Judge Dredd. Though our mega-cities were once at war, you are a much respected figure in East Meg Two”.

Not so – at least with respect to East Meg Two and Mega-City One being at war. That was East Meg One – which was nuked by Dredd. There was a whole plot point in the Apocalypse War about East Meg One’s sister city not being involved in the war – it was how East Meg One kept Mega-City Two and Texas City out of the war.

I suppose it’s possible that Yeltsin could have been speaking as or on behalf of the East Meg One veterans who went to East Meg Two after the war – it was another plot point how Dredd just had the Sov Judges who surrendered and were taken prisoner dropped off at the site of their former city (with at least one Sov Judge announcing his intention to head to East Meg Two). But you’d think he’d say something more along those lines.

Anyway, it’s all downhill from here – and we didn’t even start high up. I’m talking the ridiculous plot of surgically combining the body parts of Sov Judges killed in the war into a literal superhuman Judge. How does that even work? How does it make him apparently invulnerable, since his body parts literally came from Judges who were killed?

When did the Sovs even ship back the bodies of their Judges killed in the war? And to East Meg Two, since any they shipped back to East Meg One would have been destroyed? And did they just put them on ice for all the years before Project X?

Drokk – even Dredd has a better explanation than the actual story. “So what’re we dealing with, Yeltsin? Some kind of robot?” That would have made for a better story – and perhaps help tied in with the dormant Mechanismo storyline, even reviving it to deal with the new threat. Or just cloning or genetic engineering.

Anyway, it’s “synthi-brain” malfunctioned and the Soviet Frankenstein escaped, with the single-minded pursuit of vengeance against Dredd for killing the Sov Judges making up its body. What – all of them? And yes, I know the story says so but come on. Did Dredd singlehandedly kill every Sov Judge in the Apocalypse War? Or just the “best” ones they just happened to use for Frankenstein Division.

Also – how do its body parts “remember” being killed by Dredd? The story kinda says they do – “Judge Dredd. The name on the badge. The last thing the Sov Judges saw when they died in the Apocalypse War – but again, come on. Surely that would at least have to involve the brain from those Judges. And if the Sovs created a “synthi-brain” for their Franken-Judge – then unless that too used the brains of fallen Sov Judges killed by Dredd – why is it consumed with the desire for vengeance against Dredd?

And yes – it’s Dredd vs Frankenstein for the showdown in the finale. Dredd wins when the creature stops to monologue, which serves it right for being a wordy monster – perhaps somewhat at odds with the inarticulate monster of the Frankenstein films, but on point for the monster in the book, which met its fate from going around quoting Paradise Lost.

Okay, okay – I’ll admit I’m a fan of the epilogue, where Dredd executes Yeltsin and Andropov after their Franken-Judge wreaked havoc on Mega-City One, with the endorsement of the Sov Chief Judge from East Meg Two disowning them and their Frankenstein Division. Dredd echoes the notorious scene from the Lethal Weapon film. Diplomatic immunity? It’s just been revoked.

British sitcom Oh No, It’s Selwyn Froggit is name-dropped for a Mega-City One block Dredd attends at the outset of the storyline.

And I skipped over the episode of I Hate Christmas in prog 867 – another Dredd Christmas episode with Dredd being grumpy about Christmas, notable only for another Judge going futsie (and Dredd having to take him out). Oh – there is a brief interlude at Gus Grissom Spaceport, named for an American pilot and astronaut, where Dredd cold-heartedly sends a stow-away from Simba City straight back, despite the man’s pleas about fleeing famine in the African Dustbowl.

 

 

JUDGE DREDD CASE FILES 20:

CRIME PREVENTION (prog 872)

 

“Standard psycho test revealed Stubbs to be a potential perp. 87% probability. Better we cube him now…” Judge Dredd does Minority Report by psych profiling.

That pretty much sums up this episode, although the Minority Report psych profiling thing MC-1 has got going in it doesn’t pop up again. That’s not surprising, since you’d imagine they’d have to pre-emptively cube almost all their citizens. I mean, who in MC-1 isn’t a potential perp?

There’s a interesting titbit in the opening of the episode – apples or at least apple trees would seem to be extinct, as Dredd recovers an apple stolen from the “Fresh Fruit Museum”, which suggests that enough fruit is functionally extinct to have a museum. Dredd’s reference to apples not growing on trees any more suggests that apples may originate from other synthetic sources, perhaps like the munce that is the main meat product in MC-1.

Anyway, one of the juvenile onlookers to Dredd arresting the apple-stealing perps is a fan. He tried out to enrol as a cadet Judge at the usual intake age of five but failed. Now he’s applying for the second round intake at age twelve – again a feature that seems to pop up in this episode but I don’t recall elsewhere. In fairness, that second round intake doesn’t qualify as street-Judge cadets, but does qualify for off-world Judges or Judges in the lunar colonies.

“All we had to do is pass a stringent psychological profile test”.

No prizes for guessing that test is just the cover story for the one to pre-emptively profile potential perps – or one for me for that alliteration. Needless to say, Dredd’s young fan – Ricky Stubbs by name – is sorely disillusioned about his hero. “Now I think he’s a monster”.

He has a point – the whole thing seems massively unfair, which may be why it never popped up again. Dredd doesn’t pass any sentence, which he does even for the worst actual perps, so it’s unclear what term of encubement Ricky has to serve. It may even be indefinite. Also, MC-1 does distinguish between juvenile and adult offenders, so 12 year-old Ricky should be in juvenile detention.

 

 

 

 

JUDGE DREDD CASE FILES 20:

THE SUGAR BEAT (prog 873-878)

 

I’d say Case Files 20 is giving us a treat with a second foreign mega-city after Luxor…but it’s the Pan Andes Conurb.

Sigh. It’s not that bad – spoiler: okay, it’s still pretty bad – but it can be goofy fun if you look at it just right and ignore some of the worst stereotyping of a mega-city. And since stereotyping is the point of mega-cities, that’s saying something.

The Pan-Andes Conurb and its Judges had much potential – even if the latter were essentially just glorified security guards for the criminal sugar cartels – but instead that potential is squandered by what is arguably the laziest and most blatant stereotyping in the Judge Dredd comic. And we’re talking about that period of time in the comic’s history when stereotyping was most on the nose – after all, they had a Sov Judge named Traktorfaktori.

We’re talking literal flies buzzing about the Pan-Andes Conurb Judges – which is more the pity as they actually have one of the better uniform designs of foreign mega-city Judges, with condors instead of the eagles used in Mega-City One uniforms.

Now we get it – the Pan-Andes Conurb Judges are meant to be in the same casually brutal and corrupt category as the Judges of the only other surviving South American mega-city, Ciudad Baranquilla, the latter otherwise mimicking Mega-City One in their use of eagles in design. However, at least the Ciudad Baranquilla Judges have a genuine edge of menace and cunning to them, not to mention get some sly digs in at Mega-City One’s expense whenever there are dealings between the two mega-cities. The Pan-Andes Conurb Judges are just pathetic – literally fat and lazy in the case of their Chief Judge, seemingly in perpetual siesta but for when they are roused by corruption.

Grud knows how these bozos made it through Judgement Day when two other Latin American mega-cities – Brasilia and Chile’s South-Am City – did not and Ciudad Baranquilla just barely scraped by. Even Ciudad Baranquilla has a certain brutal ruthlessness – these guys are just hopeless

Oh – and the premise of this arc involves growing sugar, classed as an illegal drug in Mega-City One, as an analogy for cocaine, although you wonder why they don’t just grow cocaine. Anyway, Judge Dredd is sent there to sort out the sugar trade from the Pan-Andes Conurb to MC-1 – and given that the PAC “Judges” are all in the pocket of the sugar cartel, that means sorting both the cartel and the PAC Judges as well.

 

 

 

JUDGE DREDD CASE FILES 20:

THE SUGAR BEAT 1 (prog 873)

 

Dredd’s stopping the sweet stuff hitting the streets of MC-1 at its source – the Pan Andes Conurb. “It’s high quality refined glucose, primo stuff”.

That’s the premise of the Sugar Beat, sugar as illegal drug in MC-1 being a stand-in for cocaine. Ah – can sugar grow at that climate? Why not just grow and traffic cocaine? Of course, this is a world in which the potato – the potato, originating in the very location of the Pan Andes Conurb – has gone extinct!

It amuses me that Dredd’s introduction to this new flood of sugar on to the streets of Mega-City One is the speed with which a mugger attempts to flee him. Attempts, as in Dredd shoots the mugger with a heat-seeker bullet, killing him. However, as Dredd observes during pursuit – “he’s fit, I’ll give him that” – and after shooting him – “kid was fast, too fast” – before solving the mystery with satchels of sugar. Um, I don’t think sugar works like that. It’s not a performance-enhancing drug or anything. Although maybe this twenty-first century sugar is, perhaps with genetic engineering?

Anyway, that’s where that primo stuff line comes in – from Chief Judge McGruder of all people, albeit quoting the “tech boys”, as she assigns Dredd his mission to stop the sugar trade at its source. Of course, as Dredd queries her, she has an ulterior motive for getting Dredd out of the city, reflecting the simmering tension not only between Dredd and her, but with other senior judges as her mental faculties continue to deteriorate.

Dredd touches down – presumably on one of the Justice line of official space shuttles. And that’s where we’re introduced to the Pan Andean Conurb judges in all of their stereotyped glory, lazy and corrupt, down to the flies buzzing around them. As I said, it’s a pity because despite the offensive portrayal of the Judges themselves, I actually like their uniform design.

The shoulder condors in substitution for the American eagles are a nice touch. They’re not top tier by any stretch – they seem to be from military fatigues rather than biker leathers and have non-standard footwear – but they beat the Ciudad Baranquilla uniforms, which wouldn’t look out of place in a Mardi Gras parade.

Dredd gets only bad jokes from the Pan Andes Conurb Judges – despite the promised “full diplomatic cooperation from the Pan Andes Conurb Justice Department”. When he asks them where his official transport is, they joke about Yankee’s pony (as well as calling him gringo) – presumably a reference to the pony in the lyrics of Yankee Doodle Dandy.

They’re not off to a good start with Dredd – and it only gets worse from here…

 

 

JUDGE DREDD CASE FILES 20:

THE SUGAR BEAT 2 (prog 874)

 

I guess Dredd just had a thing for pyramids at this time – he’s only recently back from Luxor but here he is checking into Sector House 12 in Pan Andes Conurb

However, the interior of the Sector House 12 pyramid is not as impressive – just Pan Andes Conurb Judges clubbing their hapless citizens

Also Judge Guacamole? Sigh. That’s pretty much as bad as Sov Judge Traktorfaktori. It’s like Judge Dredd doing Asterix.

The Sector House reception Judge tries to stall Dredd by having him wait for the Chief Judge but Dredd isn’t having any of it and just asks for the quickest route to the docks. Although I’m not sure why – does he know the cartels literally ship their sugar? It is the twenty-second century after all – although given how antiquated the Pan-Andean Conurb is, maybe they do.

And yes – Dredd does ask the name of “the freighter that’s been illegally transporting sugar to Mega-City One”, so I suppose he does know that. The criminals at the dock also knew he was coming, as the Sector House reception Judge tipped them off immediately that Dredd was out of earshot. So no surprise that Dredd is set upon by one of the heavies at the dock – although I am surprised that the heavy rebukes Dredd for his lack of jurisdiction. And impressed – they obviously have a high quality of mob muscle in the Pan-Andes Conurb docks, such as to dispute a legal point with Dredd. What’s more, as far as I can tell, the heavy is right – Dredd indeed does not have jurisdiction and just pulls his gun on the heavy. “This is all the jurisdiction I need”. The heavy swipes away Dredd’s Lawgiver and a melee ensues.

 

 

 

 

JUDGE DREDD CASE FILES 20:

THE SUGAR BEAT 3 (prog 875)

 

“The Cuba Libra, Condor Wharf, Pan Andes Conurb…a few of the locals are helping Dredd with his enquiries”

I love that opening panel – and I always love Dredd putting the smackdown on a gang of thugs trying to put the smackdown on him, as here in a classic bar brawl at a lowlife dive bar. I mean the low life gets pretty low in MC-1 – but it’s even lower here in the PAC

To give them credit, these street thugs are better antagonists against Dredd than are the PAC Judges, although everyone else in this storyline is as well. It’s why the PAC Judges just tip off everyone else to do their dirty work for them.

One of them even does the impressive feat of picking up a piano – yes, a literal piano – as a weapon to throw at Dredd. He might have done better picking up literally anything else as a weapon against Dredd or even just punching him with that strength.

As it is, Dredd questions him further as to the name of the freighter transporting sugar to Mega-City One, using the persuasive technique of dunking his head in the water off the docks – “hundreds of years of pollution have turned the Black Pacific into a deadly chemical cesspool”.

I know that’s the case for the Black Atlantic, which is almost as iconic a geographical feature as the Cursed Earth, but I seem to recall the Pacific faring better. In the Song of the Surfer prelude to the Oz epic, the Pacific was shown to be unpolluted – with Chopper even playing with unmutated dolphins. And in Babes in Arms, Mega-City Two was shown as having a beach life with its coastline on an unpolluted ocean.

Also, hundreds of years? Well, perhaps two hundred at most, from 1900 or so.

Anyway, the Pacific does the trick, polluted or otherwise – the thug fesses up with the name of the freighter, the Crazy Hoolio Ingracias, which I’m sure is a play on Spanish singer Julio Iglecias.

 

 

 

 

JUDGE DREDD CASE FILES 20:

THE SUGAR BEAT 4 (PROG 876)

 

“Count yourself lucky, Gonzalez. Think what I could’ve done if I HAD jurisdiction”

Judge Dredd – he is the Law! Even when he doesn’t have jurisdiction.

“Acting on intelligence from a concerned citizen, I had reason to believe that the freighter Crazy Hoolio Ingracias was involved in illegal sugar peddling”.

I love Dredd’s journal entries – it’s part of the humor of this story arc how his deadpan journal entries contrast with what we see in the comic, which in short is Dredd as one-Judge army descending on the Pan Andes Conurb and its sugar cartels.

The first casualties of Dredd’s one-Judge army, apart from the injured thugs at the docks (we later hear of fifteen civilian casualties of this episode), are the crew of the Crazy Hoolio – after they make the mistake of firing upon him in answer to his request to board them. Impressively, Dredd takes them out with one armor-piercing shot.

“The Crazy Hoolio ignored a clear warning to heave-to. I was forced to insist. Regrettably, I hit the ship’s magazine and my key evidence sank with all hands in the lethal waters of the Black Pacific”.

Dredd has no choice but to return to the Sector House of Pan-Andes Conurb Chief Judge, where Duty Judge Gonzalez remonstrates with him as to the casualties of his one-Judge war against the sugar cartels – ironically as it was Duty Judge Conzales who tipped off the dock thugs to Dredd in the first place.

Dredd has to call Chief Judge McGruder to get her to pull diplomatic strings with her counterpart in Pan-Andes Conurb – counterpart in title only that is, as Chief Judge Garcia is effectively a henchman of the sugar cartels. En route to the Chief Judge Garcia’s office, Dredd inflicts another casualty – slamming a door into an eavesdropping Pan-Andes Conurb Judge spying on his call with McGruder.

McGruder’s diplomatic string-pulling works quickly, albeit effectively sabotaged by the Pan Andes Conurb – as Chief Judge Garcia finds an antiquated twentieth-century helicopter as transport for Dredd, although that does come with its pilot Juan, the best character in the whole Pan Andes Conurb storyline. That’s not the only sabotage – as Chief Judge Garica personally calls the sugar cartel to tip them off “the eagle is on the wing”.

 

 

 

 

JUDGE DREDD CASE FILES 20:

THE SUGAR BEAT 5 (prog 877)

 

Okay – I’ll admit I’m a fan of this panel where Dredd finds himself massive outgunned in his derelict chopper by the Pan Andes Conurb sugar cartel air-gunship. As in, completely outgunned, because I’m pretty sure Dredd’s chopper doesn’t even have guns.

This episode introduces us to the other best character in this storyline (apart from Dredd’s pilot Juan) – Dredd’s antagonist and sugar cartel queenpin of the Pan Andes Conurb, Senora Testarossa. She takes her henchman, Chief Judge Garcia, to task because he remonstrates her that killing a Mega-City One Judge is insane. Testarossa points out to Garcia that if he’d covered his tracks, “we’d never be in this ludicrous mess”. She has a point but I’m not entirely sure how Garcia was meant to do that.

Not surprisingly, the Testarossa airship guns down Dredd’s chopper into one of the sugar fields, but Dredd manages to bail out with Juan at the last moment.

Dredd and Juan find one of the sugar refineries, which has a bomb set to blow up the intruders – somewhat inconsistently, as Senora Testarossa was complaining to her airship crew about the damage to the sugar crop from Dredd’s helicopter crash. I’m prepared to bet the sugar refinery is much more expensive to replace than a small area of sugar cane fields.

 

 

 

 

JUDGE DREDD CASE FILES 20:

THE SUGAR BEAT 6 (prog 878)

 

Dredd does a plea bargain with Senora Testarossa, sugar cartel queenpin of the Pan Andes Conurb.

Of course, she tried to kill him first. The explosion of the sugar refinery didn’t take – Dredd and Juan survive it, although implausibly Dredd leaves his Lawgiver behind for Juan to retrieve. Instead, it blows a hole in the cartel’s own defenses, such that Dredd is able to infiltrate their command bunker.

There he faces off with Senora Testarossa’s two bodyguards, dispatching them with a little help from Juan – although when I first read it, I thought Juan was helping one of them, tossing him Dredd’s gun. To be honest, I’m still not clear about that. Sure, a Justice Department Lawgiver is palm-printed to its Judge to avoid unauthorized use…but did Juan know that?! Anyway, it has the effect of incapacitating the bodyguard, as the Lawgiver blows up in his hand as it is designed to do from unauthorized use – maiming him with the loss of his hand.

Anyway, Dredd simply has to invoke what will happen to Testarossa at the hands of her own customers when she defaults on their sugar purchases – which makes me think he deliberately blew up the Crazy Hoolio – for her to agree to a plea deal. In this case, involving incarceration for her own protection.

 

 

 

 

JUDGE DREDD CASE FILES 20:

THE SUGAR BEAT 6 (prog 878)

 

“That GIVES me jurisdiction”.

The Sugar Beat wraps up as we all knew it would – with Dredd arresting most of the Pan-Andes Conurb Judges for corruption, based on the testimony of Senor Testarossa.

Dare I say it, it all works out pretty sweet for Dredd. He gets to return to the Pan-Andes Conurb in style, flying back in the Testarossa air-gunship. He even gets back at the two PAC Judges who joked to him about a pony when he arrived, arresting them for corruption and commandeering their vehicle – “there’s always the pony, pal!”.

And returning to Sector House 12, he arrests Chief Judge Garcia and most of the other Judges there, which he quips will keep the Mega-City One penal colony on Titan busy for a year. Sadly, he also arrests Juan – “piloting an unlicensed obsolete aircraft for personal gain”, “failure to file preservation order for said aircraft” and “unauthorized handling of official Justice Department weapon”.

Really, Dredd? The only person to actually help you – well, not under your duress – in Pan Andes Conurb?

Anyway, the story concludes with Dredd implying that he will stick around as the interim system of justice for the Pan Andes Conurb as “most of your Judges are now in the cubes”, in the fine tradition of Mega-City One imperialism. Actually, we see MC-1 do a fair bit of what we might describe as imperialism in the Judge Dredd comic. However, Dredd seems to get back to Mega-City One quickly as we see him there in the very next episode. In fairness, while a year of the Judge Dredd comic corresponds to a year in real time (only, you know, 122 years ahead of us), the passage of time between individual episodes can be somewhat amorphous – not necessarily the week implied by their weekly publication.

 

 

 

 

JUDGE DREDD CASE FILES 20:

TOP GUN (prog 879)

 

“Drokk! Check the size of that gun!”

“Neat wheels, Judge Dredd!”

Tek Division designs a prototype Lawgiver and Lawmaster like that car by Homer Simpson. The Lawgiver – the standard Justice Department gun – was not as bad, but the Lawmaster – the standard Justice Department motorcycle – was clearly overblown.

Needless to say, it does not too work out too well with Dredd – and in similar terms to Homer’s costly over-designed car. It gets the Tek Judge responsible for it “doing twenty for criminal negligence” on Titan.

In contrast to Homer Simpson’s car, the new Lawmaster looked okay in the shop so to speak – even Dredd said so at first glance:

“Tek Division are just applying the finishing touches, Dredd. This model comes with ground-to-air missiles and jet-ski option. Boys reckon it’s capable of anything up to six hundred kilometres an hour.”

On second thoughts, I don’t know how any of those options are going to be useful in hyper-urban Mega-City One. Where are they going to use the jet-ski option? The Black Atlantic?! Also, note the influence of the British writers over the American setting – kilometres rather than miles and spelt the British way as well!

It’s soon put to the test – a full on iso-cube breakout, hijacking three Justice Department vehicles no less – and fails almost straight away, with the engine catching fire. Strangely, the Lawgiver gun also catches fire. Dredd calls in for a burns unit to be on standby – “I may need medical attention”.

As it turns out, Dredd takes out each of the hijacked vehicles – and their escaped perp hijackers – with the Lawmaster’s missiles or the Lawmaster itself, on kamikaze autopilot, without needing medical attention. “Forget it – wasn’t as bad as it looked.”

Although perhaps Dredd should not have dismissed that burns unit, as he lays down some major burns on Tek-Judge Stone – “Lousy. Their malfunction cost an estimated three hundred dead – extensive public and private damage.”

I’m assuming those casualties and that damage is from the over-destructive effect of the explosions from the missiles or the Lawmaster. I don’t know, Dredd, I’m not sure all of that can be blamed on Tek Division, given you fired those missiles and commanded the Lawmaster as effectively another kamikaze missile…

 

 

 

 

 

JUDGE DREDD CASE FILES 20:

THE MANCHU CANDIDATE (progs 881-883)

Under Siege (prog 880)

 

Justice Department turns on itself as the Wally Squad or undercover Judges send one of their own as an assassin to take a shot at Chief Judge McGruder, in what seems like a potential Wally Squad coup.

I’m shocked! No, seriously. I normally would have expected it to be the SJS or Special Judicial Squad – the Slytherins of Justice Department. But they’re loyal to McGruder as she used to be SJS, rising to its head position and seat on the Council of Five.

Not that there is a Council of Five anymore, since McGruder did not reinstate it when returning to office after Necropolis. That’s the actual subject of argument between McGruder and Dredd when both are officiating at an Academy of Law graduation of cadets as rookies. Dredd proves loyal enough though when foiling the assassination attempt at the graduation, although the assassin manages to escape through disguising himself as a cadet Judge. That tips Dredd off to the identity of the assassin as a Judge, while he and McGruder deduce it to be a Wally Squad Judge.

Dredd gets a lucky break as he is further tipped off by a violent incident at Laurence Harvey Block – named for the actor who played the brainwashed US soldier in The Manchurian Candidate film – and soon traces it to the one Wally Squad operative in that block, who is indeed the assassin, Landslide Otis.

The story takes a bizarre twist. When the assassin dies in a shootout with Dredd as Dredd apprehends him, he’s revealed to be a Sino-Cit plant or sleeper agent – hence the title Manchu Candidate. What’s more – he tells Dredd in Chinese “I was only a patsy”

But how? How did he infiltrate Mega-City One, let alone the Judges? And presumably as a child cadet – apparently with “massive facial reconstruction” to disguise his Chinese appearance

Also but how was a patsy? Is Sino-Cit trying to assassinate McGruder? But…it seems to be a genuine conspiracy by the Wally Squad gone rogue? We actually see the would-be assassin’s Wally Squad superior (and handler) giving him the orders

So did the Wally Squad know he was Sino-Cit or was it just coincidence? Was the Wally Squad using Sino-Cit or vice versa? What’s more, it’s a Chekhov’s Gun – or the Sino-Cit equivalent, obviously set up to foreshadow conflict between Sino-Cit MC-1…but it never went off

I think the writers were planning or working towards just that, some conflict between Sino-Cit and MC-1 as the next crisis or epic storyline – remember War Games in prog 854? – but it just fizzled out and they abandoned it.

I skipped over the episode Under Siege in prog 880, which involved a storyline we’ve previously seen in Judge Dredd – the computer running Michael Portillo Block for the super-rich (with the block apparently named for a British journalist and member of Parliament) goes berserk and starts killing its residents with its own security systems.

 

 

 

JUDGE DREDD CASE FILES 20:

SCALES OF JUSTICE (progs 884-885)

 

Judge Dredd does Mad Max: Beyond Thunderdome. No, not the cool part with the Thunderdome. The part with the lost tribe of children – or cadets in this case.

That’s pretty much it. Dredd is sent to investigate a distress signal from the Cursed Earth. It’s from a Justice Department H-wagon that went down with cadets on board, although weirdly Dredd refers to that occurring in the Apocalypse War and elsewhere the story refers to it as 18 months earlier (which makes more sense). So unless it’s a flashback story or the reference to the Apocalypse War was meant to be a reference to something else, perhaps Inferno or Judgement Day…?

Anyway, there’s two rival factions within the lost cadets – one hardline faction effectively seeking to set itself up as Judges in the Cursed Earth, blaming Justice Department for abandoning them, and the other that seems to be holding to the standards of Justice Department until rescue. They both lose, although a girl from the latter saves Dredd’s life from the former – and the mutie raiders who gatecrash the party.

 

 

 

JUDGE DREDD CASE FILES 20:

THE ENEMY BELOW (progs 886-887)

 

Few 2000 AD artists depicted abominations quite so eldritch as Clint Langley.

This particular eldritch abomination is a mutant creature that seems to have infiltrated the iso-cubes under the Grand Hall of Justice that Dredd had ordered to be flooded during Inferno. So Dredd takes it out when he goes diving in the flooded iso-cubes to manually activate or work the pumps to clear out the flooding.

 

 

 

 

 

JUDGE DREDD CASE FILES 20:

IT’S A DREDDFUL LIFE (Meg 2.44-2.45)

Bury My Knee at Wounded Heart (Meg 2.46)

You are the Mean Machine! (Meg 2.47)

Freefall! (Meg 2.48)

Do the Wrong Thing (Meg 2.49)

Giant (Meg 2.50-2.52)

Howler (Meg 2.53-2.56)

 

And we wrap up Case Files 20 with my favorite Megazine episodes in it – as the title indicates, it’s Dredd doing It’s a Wonderful Life in a two-episode storyline.

Dredd appears to be transported by the ghosts of his past to an alternative world in which he never lived, narrated by Judge Death as host. “Judge Dredd. This is not your life. Come hither, enter the lawless zone – a world where you never existed!”

(That’s not an exact quote – I edited Death’s sibilant hissing).

It’s a fun tour through the history of the Judge Dredd comic, a dark alternative timeline without Dredd but which remains eerily familiar to the one we know. Technically speaking, there is a Judge Dredd in this timeline – but it’s Rico, not the Joe we know.

In this timeline, Rico does the Cursed Earth mission to Mega-City Two – but uses the serum to extort to become Chief Judge of Mega-City Two, with a little help from his friends, which strangely includes tyrannosaur Satanus as his loyal pet. There’s a nice gag in which Spikes, seemingly Rico’s companion for the Cursed Earth mission as he was for our Dredd, is riding Satanus while dangling a bound Tweek as carrot for his “horse”.

Chief Judge Cal comes to power back in Mega-City One, as he did after our Dredd’s return from the Cursed Earth mission, but harmlessly chokes on a bone from Deputy Chief Judge Fish after ordering Fish on the menu in a tantrum towards his beloved pet.

Psi-Judge Anderson died, presumably in her encounter with Judge Death in their mutual introduction in the comic – and we also see a “victorious” Death grappling with the futility of exterminating all life as a solitary Dark Judge. Even at the rate of one cull per minute, it will take 800 years to eradicate the existing human population – setting aside the birth rate and other living creatures.

We see Judge Hershey as an honorary angel in the Angel Gang – angel in the sense of Victoria’s Secrets angel, serving them up drinks in cowgirl lingerie – with the Judge Child held captive in a jar. Back in Mega-City One, Otto Sump has some bizarre business partnership with P.J. Maybe, while Radlands of Ji ninja assassin Stan Lee is a film star (aptly enough, given the influence of Bruce Lee and Stan Lee for his name).

Judgement Day still happens, ending Chief Judge Rico’s racket in Mega-City Two – and sending him riding Satanus away from the nuclear sunset. And Judge Death’s quest to judge life as a crime become even harder when the dead come back to life.

So not surprisingly the other Judge Dredd villains aren’t too happy with Sabbat and gang up on him – in the art we see Rico, Judge Death and the Angel Gang, as well as a Klegg (presumably Cal’s Deputy Chief Judge Grampus), an East Meg One Judge, renegade Judge Grice, Black Atlantic pirate Captain Skank, and Call-Me-Kenneth. It’s something of a premonition of the Helter Skelter storyline to come.

It also turns out to be a hallucination – from an illegal hallucinogenic substance in a vendor’s pie, although I’m not sure why Dredd took a bite from it in the first place, other than plot contrivance. The vendor is outside Frank Capra Block – a nod of course to It’s a Wonderful Life.

As for the other Megazine episodes:

• Bury my Knee at Wounded Heart (Meg 2.46). The title is of course a play on Bury my Heart at Wounded Knee. It involves a citizen with the surname Knee trying to bury his wife – died from old age – at Wounded Heart private cemetery, burials of course being a rarity with Mega-City’s Resyk
• You are the Mean Machine (Meg 2.47) is a Choose Your Own Adventure style as Mean Machine Angel. Of course, the only correct answer involves your signature headbutt
• Freefall! (Meg 2.48) involves the tragic thoughts of a leaper as she plummets to her doom
• Do the Wrong Thing (Meg 2.49) is an obvious play on the Spike Lee film Do The Right Thing, featuring a heatwave at Danny Aiello Block, a nod to the actor in that film
• Giant (Meg 2.50-2.52) sees Giant – that’s young Giant or Giant Jr – graduate from rookie to Judge, in a case involving the return of Walter the Wobot gone wogue, I mean rogue, advocating Call-Me-Kenneth’s robot revolution.
• Howler (Meg 2.53-2.56) involves an overpowered alien trying to take over Mega-City One or at least the Sump Tower Hotel. Funny – I was today years old when I realized that Otto Sump was (or adapted to) a parody of Trump. Also, overpowered alien tries to take over Mega-City One – or at least take on Judge Dredd – is a storyline that recurs surprisingly often.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Finally, I note that I was unable to play my usual drinking game of matching the Case Files volume cover art to the interior panel art – and that’s because, after using Google Image search, I was able to match it to the cover of prog 853 as featured. That prog was actually an episode collected in Case Files Volume 19 – indeed, three episodes before the ones collected in this volume – as the final episode of the Inferno storyline (so the cover art did not relate to that episode either). Still, since I did end up matching the Case Files Volume cover art to its origin, I suppose that counts for a shot in my drinking game…?

 

JUDGE DREDD CASE FILES 19

Mega-City One 2115

(1993: progs 830-855 / Megazine 2.27-2.43)

 

Our next stop is Case Files 19 but just make sure to remain near the Mega-City Law bus – we won’t be staying here long.

 

That’s right – we’re perhaps at the darkest part of the Dark Age of Dredd, when Garth Ennis passed the torch as main writer to Grant Morrison and Mark Millar. As I said previously for the Dark Age of Dredd, this was often seen as a low point for Judge Dredd and the 2000 AD comic in general.

 

Don’t get me wrong – I like Morrison and Millar as writers, indeed as two of my favorite writers of comics…just not for Judge Dredd here. For whatever reason, they just weren’t the best fit for the character or 2000 AD comic at this time (although both had written some of their best work for 2000 AD), particularly as a writing team duo.

 

Although don’t get me wrong about that either – I do like some of their Judge Dredd episodes or storylines even at this time. There’s just slim pickings from those collected in this Case Files volume.

 

The standout for me was easily the episode War Games – not least for its introduction of the Sino-Cit Judges – although sadly subsequent episodes did nothing with its premise, either the pending crisis predicted by Psi-Division (in eighteen months, maybe less) or the “aggro-drug” they experiment on with Dredd to prepare for that crisis.

 

Ironically, the Megazine episodes collected in this volume offer up the runner-up for standout episode with Revenge of the Egghead – ironically, that is, because for me the (monthly) Judge Dredd Megazine is generally secondary to the (weekly) regular 2000 AD issues, but because we’re dealing with the Dark Age of Dredd here, the Megazine episodes often stepped up to take their place.

 

Anyway, there were some other episodes or arcs of interest collected in this volume – the Muzak Killer returns, as does another recurring antagonists penned by Garth Ennis, Johnni Kiss.

 

The episodes in Case Files 19 did feature an epic storyline – epic that is, in length as it consisted of 12 episodes, albeit towards the shorter end of Judge Dredd epics. Not so epic in terms of story quality – I am of course talking about Inferno, which I’ll mostly be passing over with a couple of panels or so. Among other things, it set in place something of a trend for the space penal colony of Titan, reserved for Judges who break the law, to become almost as bad a revolving-door prison for escapees as Arkham Asylum in Batman. Well, perhaps not quite that bad but still annoying – and at least a recurring problem in general for Mega-City One.

 

There was also the return of the Mechanismo robot judge storyline in the Megazine. Heh – more like Meh-chanismo, amirite?

 

 

 

JUDGE DREDD CASE FILES 19:

ENTER JONNI KISS (prog 830)

 

Judge Dredd vs John Wick. Well not really (and not quite yet) but similar in the whole legendary assassin thing.

Okay, okay – I have to admit Case Files 19 opens with a bang and badass assassin Jonni Kiss looks cool when introduced, although everyone looks cool when they’re in art by Greg Staples.

And okay – he proves to be more dangerous than other antagonists for Judge Dredd. That is, when we return to him after his introduction here – two years later or so in the Goodnight Kiss arc compiled in Case Files 23.

But we’ve been here before – the badass or cool hitman or assassin pitted against Judge Dredd, often doing surprisingly well or even seeming to take Dredd out but then doing the Bond villain thing of gloating over him rather than just shooting him already.

Drokk – we’ve even done the exact same foreshadowing in an introductory episode a few years before returning in a longer story arc to kick Dredd’s ass but drop the ball just before touchdown. Remember Wu Wang – or as I like to call her, Lady Deathfist, out to avenge martial artist Stan Lee? Yeah – they did the same thing for her.

Let’s face it – Dredd has faced and will continue to face a long line of badass or skilled assassins, agents, bounty hunters, hitmen or just someone with a grudge against him, all with a bullet (or something) with his name on it, arguably going all the way back to his own clone-brother Rico. Grud – there’s probably enough for their own top ten – Top 10 People Out to Get Dredd or even just Top 10 Judge Dredd Assassins & Hitmen. As Dredd himself says when he hears someone is out to get him or has a grudge, they’ll just have to get in line to take their shot.

Indeed, the Megazine episodes compiled in this same volume include a parody of that same character type of the badass cool assassin out to get Dredd – Slick Dickens, amusingly written as a character of that type written by a Mega-City One citizen, which of course sees him repeatedly jailed by Dredd (although you suspect Dredd’s secretly a fan),

In fairness, Jonni Kiss does better and is better at it than most, as evidenced by his trophy wall of Judge badges.

And he is introduced with a literal bang – assassinating no less than East Meg Two’s Supreme Judge Traktorfaktori. Sigh – I liked him and he seemed a decent sort when introduced into the Glasnost storyline. And yes – Judge Dredd continues its 90s trend of names for foreign Judges seemingly straight out of Asterix. It gets worse in this episode – as we hear of two rival contenders for succession, Riboflavin and Markimarkov, although at least it gives us the great line from Dredd “one Sov’s as bad as another.”

Of course, it helped that Trakforfaktori seemed to be well past it and that Kiss had a little help from some Gila-Munja mutant offshoots, although he double-crosses them, I wouldn’t put it past the Sovs that he had a little inside help as well, given the lax security we see here – possibly one of those rival contenders or even just anyone from the Diktatorat because that’s just how they roll.

But in fairness, Kiss does seem to be the best at what he does – taking out the Supreme Judge as well as the Gila-Munja out for revenge. And those were just test runs to prove his worth for his real target – who is of course Dredd. Although weirdly Kiss seems to go in for a good old-fashioned fax for receiving his instructions, even though those instructions are literally just the one word “DREDD”, setting up his subsequent appearance…

 

 

JUDGE DREDD CASE FILES 19:

THE GREAT BRAIN ROBBERY (progs 835-836)

The Judge Who Lives Downstairs (prog 831)

The Chieftain (prog 832-834)

 

Judge Dredd’s memories are so bad they literally make your head explode!

Why? “Because they’re all bad, meathead”

No, seriously – that’s the plot twist of the two-episode storyline, The Great Brain Robbery, and I am here for it, even if it does not make sense or seems impossible in biology or physics.

I mean, this story is a hoot, both in its premise and plot twist.

Yes, the premise involves yet another new crime driven by technology – memory theft (or thought theft as it is called in the episodes), courtesy of the neuron extractor. Although I don’t recall it featured anywhere else other than these two episodes, which might reflect how flawed its premise is as a crime when you look at it too closely.

We’re introduced to it through a Mega-City ‘tap’ gang, literally mugging one of MC-1’s many down-and-out citizens of his memories. In fairness, they seem a cut above the usual street gang.

For one thing, they carry it out in broad daylight on a crowded street. Sure, they seem to be relying on that common tendency to look the other way, even in our contemporary cities, let alone the dystopian giant mega-city city of the future – particularly where the victim is someone socially invisible like a homeless beggar. That’s further explained by the narration in the second episode – which notes that half of the Judge force has been wiped out by Necropolis and Judgement Day, so “the creeps are making the most of it”.

For another, this memory-mugging gang has more resources than your average street gang. Apparently that’s because memory theft has a high-end market, with rich citizens paying big to live vicariously through the stolen memories. That’s the part that doesn’t make sense to me. The lives of the overwhelming majority of Mega-City One’s citizens – at least 90% – are defined by their dystopian quality of grinding welfare dependency and drudgery.

Why would Mega-City One’s richest citizens – who can afford to actually live top-end experiences – want to buy memories of lower-end experiences? Sure there may be some thrill of ‘slumming’ it in someone’s crappy memories. More probably, there may be the thrill of experiencing some violent crime that is the other definitive feature of life in Mega-City One, although one anticipates that the market would be more for memories of perpetrators rather than victims, as the equivalent of playing some video game like Grand Theft Auto. However, the narrative makes it clear that the neuron extractor only extracts a few memories and that it’s a matter of potluck which ones you get.

More to the point, the subject of the stolen memories actually referred to in the storyline are mostly banal – “best memory my supplier ever sold me was one of picking up this measly account’s clerk med bills”. Sheesh! That guy can buy all my crappy memories. Although I do like the drug analogy.

Anyway, at least the main antagonist of the storyline – Vito Colletta – has the right idea for a target with memories that promise to be exciting. That’s right – it’s Judge Dredd. After all, we read the comic for excitement.

The memory thieves get their opportunity from Dredd doing his usual thing – going in solo into a city sector gone wild. Chief Judge McGruder initially tells him “you’re going to need serious backup” and the withering look he gives her is priceless. (She immediately retracts her statement – “Uh–no offence, Joe…!”).

 

 

Anyway, that gives the memory thieves the chance to do a drive-by shooting with the neuron extractor. They only get a “handful” of memories but that’s apparently worth “at least 5 mil”. Although I’m a little worried – does this mean that Dredd has lost those memories? Going by that homeless victim we see in the story, it does. On the bright side, Dredd does end up apprehending the rich receivers behind the memory thieves and they have some device to play the memories, so he could have used it to restore the stolen memories.

That of course brings me to that plot twist. Vito Colletta tries on Dredd’s memories for size – after not only reneging on paying anything for them, let alone 5 million, but also having his henchman literally throw them off the building. No honor among memory thieves, I guess.

Anyway, as I said, Vito tries on Dredd’s memories for size – “Judge Dredd’s memories! The action of Necropolis–crossing the Cursed Earth in a killdozer. Soon I’ll have the memories of a hero!” – and they blow his mind. Literally – as in his head explodes. And just before Dredd raids them too, hence his line to the rest of the memory receivers, to which he adds “Guess that creep wasn’t tough enough to handle ’em!”

And yes I skipped two stories

 

• The Judge Who Lives Downstairs (prog 831) – A fun little episode of Dredd doing the rounds in his home block, Randy Yates Block, which the episode notes is “the safest place to live in Mega-City One”. No surprise there.
• The Chieftain (progs 832-834) – an ex-Brit Cit ranger from Cal Hab (Caledonian Habitation Zone) on a roaring rampage of revenge in Mega-City One. He even has a weaponized bagpipe droid that kills with sonic waves – the Psycho-Piper, a “tight focus sonic disruptor on a robot chassis”. Dear Grud. Still – probably sounds better than regular bagpipes.

 

 

JUDGE DREDD CASE FILES 19:

MUZAK KILLER – LIVE! (progs 837-839)

 

Video killed the radio star – the Muzak Killer’s back and this time he’s live! And again in that glorious Dermot Power art!

Yes – it’s Marty Zpok, back from when we last saw him a couple of years back in Case Files 16. I mean, there’s only been a global zombie apocalypse in the meantime but not much seems to have changed for Zpok and the 22nd century ‘muzak’ he hates.

Well, except of course, he’s doing time in the cubes from his run as the Muzak Killer, when he targeted a thinly veiled version of the 1990s English music producers Stock Aitken Waterman and their expatriate Australian artists from the long-running (and highly popular) soap opera Neighbours, foremost among them Kylie Minogue.

Apart from time in the cubes, that has also seen him as the butt of the running gag in these episodes – being called “sad”, as in pathetic or a loser. It starts slowly and subtly with the abuse of his fellow inmates – as they beat him up in the shower, leaving him with a gap-toothed grin from a missing tooth like Mad Magazine’s Alfred E. Neuman for the rest of the story – but escalating to pretty much everyone, including Dredd, calling him out as sad or pathetic.

As “sad” as he is, his luck changes as we find out the Muzak Killer has his own fans. Not many of them to be sure, but quality counts over quantity for fans that are willing and able to break him out of prison in an aerial raid, led by his biggest fan called – what else? – Indiana Saddoe, presumably yet another play on the recurring gag of Zpok being sad. The raid doesn’t exactly go without a hitch. Unluckily, Judge Dredd happens to be in the vicinity and a well-aimed hi-ex shot takes out the “stratorover”, although Zpok and Saddoe survive the crash to escape to Saddoe’s apartment.

And from there they plot – well, mostly Zpok plots and Saddoe just goes along with it like the saddo he is – to hijack a ‘vid’ broadcasting station and broadcast Zpok’s war on muzak live. Needless to say, it does not go well for them, although it ends in a surprisingly lucky turn of events for Zpok. Lucky lucky lucky!

 

 

 

JUDGE DREDD CASE FILES 19:

MUZAK KILLER – LIVE 1 (prog 837)

 

I’ve already covered most of the first episode in my introduction to this arc but the first episode concludes with Saddoe and Zpok holed up at Saddoe’s apartment.

Interestingly, Saddoe is such a fan that he’s even purchased a copy of Zpok’s original Muzak Killer outfit from the first story for Zpok to wear in this one. (Of course, Zpok was wearing his original outfit when apprehended by Dredd). Nothing is said – we just see Zpok wearing it as opposed to his iso-cube regulation clothing so Saddoe must have bought it for him in advance.

 

Sadly, Zpok is less impressed with Saddoe’s music collection, even though it’s “the hippest alterni-music vibes in the Meg). For Zpok, all new music is muzak – “Exactly, Indy. Lesson one – music is only cool when it’s old.”

 

Although he contradicts himself with the very next words out of his mouth – “Down to business, Indy. How’s the music scene doing? Who’s big? Must be some pretty good bands about, since I wiped out the bad ones!”

 

O well – I suppose we shouldn’t look for consistency in the mind of a deranged killer. I suppose he could be talking about covers bands…

 

Anyway, that prompts Saddoe to reply that “lots of new muzak stars popped up and took over from the dead ones”.

 

Zpok is incredulous – “Eh? They didn’t even notice me?”

 

Well yes, they did – but not in any good way. Saddoe produces all of the “press clippings” from the so-called Ramsay bop or Zpok’s first murder spree (weird to think that there’s still paper press clippings or no digital scans in the twenty-second century). And upon reading them Zpok is barraged with descriptions of how pathetically sad he is…which makes him angry.

 

To appease him, Saddoe sees if there is any news of Zpok’s escape on the vid news and sure enough there is. Even better, Zpok rebounds with a newfound sense of purpose upon seeing the latest ‘vid’ entertainment show, Word Up, featuring live muzak. Now he’s a man with a plan – “Heh heh heh…Indy, my boy? You and I are going to be vid stars”.

 

I just love the look on Indy’s face, which says it all really…uh oh. 

 

 

JUDGE DREDD CASE FILES 19:

MUZAK KILLER – LIVE 2 (prog 838)

 

“Oh my drokking Grud!”

I mean, haven’t we all wanted to take a monster chainsaw to that one annoying ponce mouthing off about us? You know the one. And this was before social media – now you could cut through whole swathes of online critics.

Joking aside, I can’t help but feel that writer Garth Ennis or artist Dermot Power are using the Muzak Killer to work through some issues here. That journalist – David O’Steven – has an awfully distinctive appearance. I suspect there’s some inner joke in his name or appearance that I just can’t get through the dust of all these years later.

Anyway, David O’Steven was the journalist whose gutter press writing about the Muzak Killer’s last appearance enraged Zpok on reading it – “Marty Zpok’s slaughter of muzak stars proves just how sad some people are. The love of a good woman might help – but he’s so sad he’s probably never had a girlfriend, the sad jerk”. So there you have it – Judge Dredd did i-n-c-e-l-s first by decades.

And as luck would have it, prompted by Zpok’s escape, he’s writing – or dictating – more of the same when Zpok decides to pay him a visit with Saddoe in toe. Well, you can guess how that goes, particularly with that chainsaw. Mind you, you’ve got to love O’Steven’s last words – “I’ll print an apologaaaagh!”. Sorry Dave, I’m afraid you can’t do that.

Meanwhile, Dredd is hot on Zpok’s trail, although it’s hard to miss. As Dredd observes – “I’m in O’Steven’s hab, Control – he’s all over the place.” Let’s say the visual image of the panel matches that.

However, as we know, Zpok has bigger plans than petty personal revenge – or perhaps rather bigger plans that overlap his petty personal revenge against the world of muzak. And those plans involve hijacking the popular vid broadcast Word Up.

A quick tangent – we see the host of Word Up interviewing “aging star Conrad Conn”. Now there’s a blast from the past – Conrad Conn featured all the way back in The Day the Law Died (as collected in Case Files 2), as Mega-City One’s most popular vid star conscripted by Chief Judge Cal to star as Cal in the Chief Judge’s video ode to himself. That’s what I love about Ennis writing Dredd – you can tell he was a real fanboy for the classic early episodes.

Anyway, that’s what Zpok and Saddoe do – hijack the vid broadcast. Saddoe takes over the control room, with a randomizer to block the Judges from jamming the broadcast (and to keep the control room robots and staff broadcasting at gunpoint). And Zpok’s our host, after throttling the actual host Gerry Hindu and shooting female co-host Kati Mukkrake.

And you know – I think he may have missed his calling as a vid broadcast host, because he’s quite entertaining. Perhaps he and Mega-City One’s muzak industry might have been happier if he’d gone that route as a host of a music vid broadcast, a metaphorical Muzak Killer as it were with snide snarky criticism of muzak stars he doesn’t like. Sadly now he’s the literal Muzak Killer – and as he announces to his live audience, he’s just getting started with the show’s guests…

 

 

JUDGE DREDD CASE FILES 19:

MUZAK KILLER – LIVE 3 (prog 839)

 

“And now…the end is near…And so I face…the final curtain”

Well it’s time to wrap up this show – and by this show, I mean the vid broadcast Word Up hijacked by Marty Zpok a.k.a. the Muzak Killer. He must have known how this would end but he planned to go out with a bang – you might say he did it his way. Indeed, he does more than say it – he sings it, which I found quite surprising since I hadn’t picked him for a Sinatra fan. I mean, I know he liked old music – it’s his moniker after all – but I thought he preferred the different genre of classic or alternative ‘rock’.

And as I said, he goes out with a bang – indeed, several of them. He killed the two broadcast hosts last episode and now he gets started on the guests. Mairaid McSlaphead – I’m pretty sure she was a parody of Sinead O’Connor. Demanda – another of the broadcast’s hosts. Clarence from the Crazy Sked Moaners – not sure of the reference, but ironically he kills himself trying to carve the word ‘real’ into his forehead with a las cutter. Not sure we can chalk that one up to Zpok’s tally, although arguably Zpok egged him on – and you have to admit Zpok quipping “that’s not how you spell real” is funny. In fairness, it wouldn’t be easy getting the letters right on your own forehead.

Zpok gets another good gag in when he asks Anni O’Boge, sister of Syreen O’Boge whom he killed in the ‘Ramsay Bop Massacre’, about her sister “two years ago”. She starts to answer him but belatedly recognizes him – “Hang on a mo’…ain’t you the bloke who…?”. “Yep” says Zpok as he shoots her.

Quick side bar – Anni would presumably be a parody of Danni Minogue, sister of Kylie Minogue parodied by Styreen. And I hadn’t noticed before now that the ‘Ramsay Bop Massacre’ would also be a reference to Ramsay Street, setting of the Australian soap opera Neighbours, beloved in England and from which Kylie and her fellow ‘muzak’ pop stars originated.

Anyway, that’s the last shot Zpok gets in – as Judge Dredd has answered the call by Justice Control to attend the studio, shot Saddoe, and had the hostage studio staff shut down the broadcast (bypassing Saddoe’s jammer).

Which brings us to Zpok singing My Way with its apt lyrics – and Dredd brings down the curtain with a gunshot to the head. “Sad, creep.”

 

 

JUDGE DREDD CASE FILES 19:

MUZAK KILLER – LIVE 3 (prog 839)

 

But wait – there’s more. I can’t resist this epilogue (“six weeks later”) of how Marty Zpok learned to stop worrying and love the muzak.

 

Of course it helps that Dredd’s headshot effectively lobotomized him.

 

Lucky, lucky, lucky.

There’s two episodes after Muzak Killer, which represented Garth Ennis handing over the reins of primary writing duties to the duo of Grant Morrison and Mark Millar:

• Tough Justice (prog 840), penned by Mark Millar, in which juves exchange the equivalent of campfire horror stories about Judge Dredd embodying the titular tough justice to scare one of them straight (sadly too late as Dredd catches them trying to dispose of a blaster)
• Down Among the Dead Men (prog 841) also penned by Milar – in which grave-robbing seems to make a 22nd century revival, except snatching corpses from Resyk for medical students. Except…isn’t most medicine done by robots?

 

 

JUDGE DREDD CASE FILES 19:

INFERNO (progs 842 – 853)

 

I should be excited.

Firstly, Inferno is a Judge Dredd epic, albeit of twelve episodes rather than the usual ‘full’ epic length – the first epic after Judgement Day and yet another existential threat to Mega-City One (as well as potentially to other mega-cities), made more dire by how much Justice Department was weakened by Judgement Day.

Secondly, it’s Grant Morrison’s debut as primary writer for Judge Dredd, taking over (in tandem with Mark Millar) from Garth Ennis.

I should be excited but I’m not. That’s because Inferno is distinctly underwhelming. I’m not entirely sure why – it hits all the right beats for a Dredd epic, but yet feels strangely by the numbers, like Morrison was phoning it in. As indeed it felt for his and Millar’s run as the primary writers on Judge Dredd and 2000 AD – as much as I enjoy both writers for their work elsewhere (indeed Morrison’s earlier story Zenith for 2000 AD remains my second favorite comic of all time, second only to Judge Dredd), ranking them both in my Top 10 Comics, they just didn’t seem to be the right fit here. I’m not the only one that regards their run as where the Dark Age of Dredd was at its darkest, although it still has its highlights – but Inferno isn’t one of them.

It’s essentially a jailbreak – from the penal colony of Titan back to Mega-City One. How anyone pulls this off is beyond me, but Inferno started the trend for Titan as some sort of revolving door prison IN SPACE, rivalled only by Arkham Asylum in Batman for ease of escape or riot (or both). Even worse, the jailbreak effectively happened off-panel before the epic, in the prequel Purgatory by Mark Millar featured separately in the Megazine.

By his own admission, Morrison wrote Dredd simply as “just a big bastard with a gun”, but despite some tantalizing glimpses to the contrary, Morrison also wrote the antagonist – ex-Judge Grice returned from his exile and imprisonment for his conspiracy against the referendum and Judge Dredd back in The Devil You Know / Twilight’s Last Gleaming – equally as one dimensional “bastard with a gun”. Except, you know, not just a gun but also armed with an apocalyptic virus. I’ll give him ram-raiding the Hall of Justice with a spaceship for style though.

I tend to agree with the observations of the Dredd Reckoning blog about Inferno:

“Instead, there’s so much horribly clumsy writing here. Morrison asks us to believe that Grice’s small team of disgraced, hobbled ex-Judges could drive all the current Judges out of the city (off-panel); that the Grand Hall of Justice is built directly on top of iso-cubes; that Dredd would unblinkingly slaughter a building’s worth of prisoners rather than allow them to potentially be freed (although “it was only a parking offence!” strikes me as a very Morrisonian joke…that the Titan escapees would be packed on board a “pre-programmed robot ship” (cough) so Dredd could blow it up; that the Statue of Judgement is perched adjacent to the Cursed Earth, i.e. on the western border of Mega-City One (hint: it’s directly adjacent to the Statue of Liberty, which is on the eastern edge of North America); that the Judges would have an oh-well attitude to germ warfare decimating the population of MC1 (“fewer citizens means less crime”–er, that’s Judge Death’s position); that, after killing a bad guy in a career-record gruesome way, Dredd would go for a James Bond-style one-liner; that hand-to-hand combat between Dredd and Grice could settle the entire problem…”

I also tend to agree with the observation that Wagner’s Day of Chaos not only was an effective sequel to the Apocalypse War, but was “also in some ways, a vastly improved variation on a lot of the plot devices of Inferno…It involves psychic premonitions of doom, germ warfare, turncoat Judges, the Statue of Judgment and Hall of Justice attacked)”

Still, it did have some classic Ezquerra art, so I’ll essentially go from one art highlight to the next while being as economic with the epic’s storyline as possible.

 

 

JUDGE DREDD CASE FILES 19:

INFERNO 1-2 – Inferno / Titan Fall! (progs 842-843)

 

“Death from the skies!”

Sigh – Psi-Division being useless as usual without Anderson.

Okay – I have to admit that’s a badass introduction to Inferno in the final panel of the first episode.

And you have to give it to the epic that it hits the ground running – literally ram-raiding the Hall of Justice FROM SPACE!

And it’s badass introductions all round this episode – not least for Judge Dredd himself, as he takes out the Bazooka Brothers, a dubious duo using their titular weapon of choice to destroy shops or something.

But before Dredd, we’re introduced to Psi-Judge Janus – literally on her 19th birthday. Although that just shows how useless Psi-Division is that this raw Psi-Judge, presumably fresh out from graduating as a cadet, is their replacement for Psi-Judge Anderson (on mission off-world). I mean, she’s, like, likable enough – that’s a play on her Valley Girl verbal mannerisms by the way – but she’s no Judge Anderson.

Sadly, Psi-Division is even more useless than that as they also have to rely on a secondment from another mega-city – which sees the first introduction of an Indian mega-city, Delhi-Cit (sometimes written as Nu Delhi), and an Indian Judge, Psi-Judge Bhaji.

It’s his precognitive dream quoted in that panel – “death from the skies”. Bhaji is only marginally more useful than Psi-Division. I mean, at least he had some precognitive alert to the impending disaster about to strike Mega-City One – although apparently “every single Judge in Psi-Division had the same dream” but it’s not exactly helpful advice in terms of warning or preventative action, is it? It’s even less helpful timing as it’s literally just before it happens. That’s barely precognitive. It’s like Lisa Simpson tells a fortune teller in one episode – wow, you can see into the…present. That dream is barely better than looking out the window.

Or screen in this case, as Mega-City One detects fifteen incoming spaceships as the second episode opens – after the reader has been introduced to the epic’s antagonist, ex-Judge Grice and his fellow escapees from Titan, “carrying a deadly germ weapon, the meat virus”.

Which seems to have a nearly instantaneous effect in the dispersion area as they use their ships to ram raid the Hall of Justice and other buildings. We see a Judge Noonan succumb to it as she reports back from Mick Travis Block – named for a fictional film character. “Rapid…toxic…effects!”

We also see Grice swooping in with a jetpack – “This is your wake-up call, Mega-City One!”

I guess that space prison time on Titan left a little to be desired for rehabilitation.

 

 

JUDGE DREDD CASE FILES 19:

INFERNO 3-4 Descent into the Maelstrom! / Kill or Cure! (progs 844-845)

 

“No! It was only a parking offence! My Grud! It was only a parking offence…!”

Classic Morrison gag, although not up there with his best one-liners – for that, you have to go to Zenith.

Anyway, Grice and his renegade ex-Judges overwhelm Justice Department with their spaceship ram-raids – and above all the “meat virus”, apparently a weaponized virus they were developing on Titan. McGruder tells the other senior Judges in the Hall of Justice bunker that they have about an hour before showing symptoms – masks are useless as it spreads through the skin.

Still not sure how Grice’s few ex-Judges and spaceships are able to achieve the spread – of ex-Judges, ram raids or the meat virus – to overwhelm the entire Justice Department throughout Mega-City One but there you have it. There’s also Citi-Def but the writers forgot them for the other recent crises of Necropolis and Judgement Day as well.

There’s a grisly scene replaying that brutal torn apart by horses thing you see as a trope in pre-modern torture or execution. You know the one – where you have four horses pulling in opposite directions on a rope or chain to each of a person’s limbs. Except here of course they use Lawmasters – begging the question of how they bypassed the security protocols of the Lawmaster computers. You know, being ex-Judges convicted and sent to Titan.

Anyway, Grice and his renegade Judges ram-raid the Hall of Justice itself, as well as pumping the gas with the meat virus through the vents. McGruder orders a strategic evacuation – but says they can’t “afford to let Grice free the prisoners in the iso-cubes”. Um – why? As in why would he free them? And why can’t they afford to let him free the prisoners – would they really be reliable allies for Grice, or allies at all? Although it does give us that parking offence gag, as Dredd orders the cubes to be flooded. Since when did the Hall of Justice have iso-cubes? And follow-up question – why are they rigged to be flooded? Fortunately, the flooded cubes do serve a more useful – and less callous – purpose later in the epic.

We get to see Judge Hershey pull a big damn heroes moment similar to McGruder gunning down zombies in Judgement Day, but for the renegade judges threatening to gun down the evacuees, Dredd and McGruder among them. She also has a H-wagon, begging the question of where every other H-wagon in the city is and what they are doing.

As they fly away in the H-wagon – apparently part of a general and implausible retreat by all Justice Department outside the city, something which has never occurred in any crisis before or since – McGruder explains the meat virus. An alien virus (from actual dead aliens on Titan), Justice Department were developing it as a weapon. Secondary stage symptoms are sores appearing on the skin a couple of days after infection – more seriously, they all have two weeks to live as that’s when the terminal tertiary stage symptoms or complete tissue breakdown appears unless the antidote is administered before then. (And it has to be before the tertiary stage).

You’d think Justice Department might have had some antidote in Mega-City One in case something went wrong on Titan…but no. You’d be wrong. Of course, Grice and his renegade ex-Judges have the antidote. So that probably explains why McGruder heads off on a Lawmaster, presumably to make amends for her lapse of judgement – perhaps offering herself up to Grice in return for the antidote – and Dredd pursues her.

 

 

JUDGE DREDD CASE FILES 19:

INFERNO 5-6 – Long Live the Chief Judge! / Judges with Grudges (progs 846-847)

 

“Long live the new Chief Judge! Long live the Lord of Misrule!”

That’s ex-Judge Grice’s declaration of usurpation, as he usurps the position of Chief Judge in MC-1.

Of course, Dredd is having none of it – “When are you gonna get sick of the sound of your own voice, Grice? ‘Cause I’m already sick of it.”

Before we get there, episode 5 opens with the narration – “Forced out of Mega-City One by Grice and his renegades, the Judges have established a makeshift encampment in the Cursed Earth”.

By makeshift encampment, it means H-wagon parking lot – and by Cursed Earth, it means literally parking their H-wagons right outside the walls of Mega-City One.

The whole scenario is implausible, but perhaps above all that this entire epic makes it seem that the entirety of Mega-City One consists of not much more than a short stretch of the West Wall. Hence, Grice’s ridiculously small force of ex-Judges straight outta Titan in a ridiculously small flotilla of ridiculously small spaceships was able to eject all the Judges from Mega-City One – an Atlantic seaboard super-conurbation of 400 million from New Hampshire to North Carolina – and apparently to the one encampment as H-wagon parking lot outside the West Wall.

It gets worse. Dredd saves a citizen about to be randomly killed by two of Grice’s renegade Judges – and by randomly, it means because the citizen’s ‘eyes are too close together”. Really? Surely Grice’s renegade Judges have some motivation beyond terrorizing random citizens for no reason? Or at least something better to do? Like some sort of plan or orders from Grice?

After saving the citizen, Dredd directs the citizen to report to the cubes “when this is over” for doing nothing more than pleading with the renegade Judges “what do you want?” and offering them “everything I’ve got” – “I’m giving you six months for attempted bribery”. Really? They weren’t actual Judges but renegade ex-Judges and hence criminals – something Dredd is at pains to point out when the epic plays this scene again almost beat for beat a few episodes later, albeit more true to Dredd’s character dealing with the citizen he saves in that scene. Dredd wouldn’t charge a citizen being robbed by other citizens for trying to offer the robbers what they want because of their actual or threatened violence (although he might charge a citizen for flaunting wealth as enticement) – that’s essentially the nature of robbery. Of course, this is an example of how Morrison misfired with the character in this epic, essentially parodying Dredd as embodiment of the Law consistent with his catchphrase, except Dredd isn’t enforcing the Law so much as some deliberately obtuse distortion of it. And even if Dredd was obtuse enough to effectively charge victims of a crime as a party to it, it makes no sense or strategic timing for him to do so here.

Meanwhile, McGruder is being beaten up by Grice as he taunts her – “What did you think you were doing coming here, McGruder?”

Um, he has a point – what was her plan? Presumably it was offering herself up to Grice – but you’d think she planned to do so in exchange for something. You know, perhaps Grice handing over the antidote to the Judges? Or the citizens?

Anyway, Grice offers an exchange – her life for her loyalty to him, which we also saw him offer to that Judge he had dismembered by Lawmasters. Um, what was Grice’s plan here if she accepted? Which she should have – or more precisely feigned it to buy time to get the antidote or plot against Grice, hence my query what was Grice’s plan here if she accepted. Hence the query of what her plan actually was offering herself up to Grice – and what Grice’s plan was if she accepted his offer.

Fortunately for him, she neither has a plan nor accepts his offer, so instead he decides to use her for a much more dramatic and demoralizing display in the style of the Mongol conquests – which, come to think of it, his violent takeover of MC-1 resembles. Or perhaps more in the style of defenestration – except for throwing her out a high storey window, he just launches her on her Lawmaster off the Wall in full view of the aghast onlooking Judges.

Hence his declaration of usurpation. That might have been more interesting as some sort of declaration of anarchy – Lord of Misrule – or some sort of inversion in the style of a Department of Injustice, but Morrison doesn’t do much with it.

McGruder is a tough old bird – she survived injuries in the Apocalypse War, she survived her Long Walk in the Cursed Earth, and she survives this, albeit barely and with critical injuries.

And Dredd picks this moment to somehow materialize on top of the Wall for a dramatic showdown with Grice. Um – what was Dredd’s plan here, exactly? Yes, yes, it’s literally a baseball bat as we see a couple of episodes later. But what was his plan?! I’m so confused!

Anyway, it works out as well as you’d expect for him, given the showdown is only halfway through the epic. Which is to say, not too well, as Grice and his fellow renegade Judges easily best the sickened Dredd. Dredd is saved by a literal deus ex machina – well, literal ex machina anyway – in the form of Walter the Wobot, who also materializes out of nowhere, and out of a prolonged absence since his regular appearances as Dredd’s comic sidekick (which also seems misplaced here). Walter manages to get him out of the City (through some strange shafts or tunnels in or through the Wall) to the Cursed Earth – where it’s a case of out of the frying pan, into the fire as a horde of cannibal mutants attack them…

 

 

JUDGE DREDD CASE FILES 19:

INFERNO 7-8 – Death Dance! / Trial by Fire (progs 848-849)

 

“I got my plan right here!”

Okay, okay – I admit it. I can’t help but like this panel – the best of the epic – even if it doesn’t make sense.

I mean, his plan is a baseball bat?! Usually Dredd has better plans than that.

Also where did he get the bat? He literally just woke up in a makeshift hospital bed in the Justice Department encampment (where they didn’t take his helmet off).

I’m not done with the bat as his plan. Yes, yes – I know it’s Dredd announcing that he’s still in the fight (“who’s with me?”) but a literal fight? That is, a one on one, hand to hand – or rather bat to bat – smackdown with Grice? You know, the same plan as before, that saw him end up in the hospital bed, except with…a bat? You know you have a gun, don’t you, Dredd? Which if you had simply used last time you confronted him – shot first and spoke later – it would now be over. Instead, you did the whole  “I’m taking you in” routine which made no sense – as Grice even said and he had a point. And you only ended up in a hospital bed by grace of deus ex machina in the form of Walter – and Psi-Judge Janus tracking you before the mutants ate you.

Oh yeah – that’s how episode 7 opened. Dredd is about to be eaten by cannibal mutants after Walter helped him out of the city – but Psi-Judge Janus leads a team of Judges to find him and gun down the mutants. “Judge Janus picked up your psi-profile and led us to you”. Hence the hospital bed.

In the meantime, we do have some entertaining internal villain monologues from Grice, who in his usurped position of Chief Judge appears to have become completely deranged, combining the capricious psychopathy of Chief Judge Cal with the omnicidal mania of Judge Death. No, seriously – he muses happily to himself of the death of the entire population of Mega-City One – “Everyone has to die. No one is innocent” – before taking it on world tour. “And then Grice will stretch out his hand to touch and corrupt each of the great mega-cities in turn”.

I mean, replacing the eagle head with a skull on the Chief Judge uniform is something of a dead giveaway (heh).

Surprisingly, there’s only one sane man among his renegade ex-Judges trying to take him out before he kills everyone – “Grice has gone loco! He just wants to kill everythin’ now. Figger he reckons he’s Judge Death or sumthin'”. Unfortunately, he only has one flaky co-conspirator who betrays him to Grice, so Grice has him “executed” (along with the co-conspirator). By chainsaw.

I guess Dredd’s bat is looking better now…

 

 

JUDGE DREDD CASE FILES 19:

INFERNO 9-10 – Here Comes the Judge! / Girl Trouble! (progs 850-851)

 

You know I love a good panel of Dredd’s catchphrase – “I am the Law!”

Also roll credits as Grice replies – “Welcome to the Inferno, Dredd. Burn in hell!”

That’s at the end of these two episodes. Before we get there, we left episode 7 with Dredd heading off, a man with a plan with a bat in his hand, to beat up Grice.

In fairness, this time the epic does Dredd right as he saves a female elderly citizen from two renegade Judges. They were extorting fines from her under pain of execution, but as she pleads with them that she has not money, they switch to killing her as penalty “for flaunting poverty”. Although you’d think the renegade Judges, having the run of the city, could pick more lucrative targets. You know – banks, corporations, wealthier city blocks. But no – I guess street mugging it is.

At least this time there’s no nonsense from Dredd about charging the citizen. Instead he tells her – “On your way, citizen. Anyone you meet, tell ’em Judge Dredd is back!”.

Meanwhile, Grice has been busy setting his own charges – explosive charges on the Statue of Judgement. And yes – he detonates them, bringing the Statue down on top of a large section of the West Wall and tearing it down, conveniently right in front of the exiled Judges encamped outside the Wall. This becomes their cue, spurred on by exhortations from Psi-Judge Janus and Judge Hershey, to charge in and take back the city. Although – couldn’t they have just gone in with Dredd through the underground access he used? Or just flown in on the H-wagons which Hershey exhorts to get “rolling” into the city.

Somehow Bundy, the extremely butch chief henchperson of Grice, manages to find and get the jump on Dredd. Finally he uses his gun to just shoot her, as he should have done with Grice those few episodes back, albeit after the cavalry arrives in the form of Hershey and other Judges. RIP Bundy.

And that brings us to Dredd hunting out Grice for another showdown as the latter is getting started on burning down the Hall of Justice with a flamethrower, declaring there is no law – hence Dredd’s signature catchphrase. Although once again you could have just shot him, Dredd, rather than announce your presence. You’re even shown pointing your gun right at him (with Grice busy flamethrowing in another direction). It’s easy – you just did it with Bundy.

Anyway, there goes the element of surprise again as Grice turns his flamethrower on Dredd.

 

 

 

JUDGE DREDD CASE FILES 19:

INFERNO 11 – White Heat! (prog 852)

 

I’ve come to that time in my Mega-City Law recap when I play my Dredd drinking game – matching up the Case Files volume cover art with the comic panel art.

And what glorious art! By Brian Bolland of course – you can see his signature peeping out from under the 2000 AD title logo, meaning that it wasn’t the comic panel art but the comic issue cover art, Bolland’s specialty by that time.

Unfortunately – and unforgivably! – Case Files 19 does not include this cover, seemingly breaking the rule for Case Files volume covers including art from the episodes compiled in them, and usually compiling the Dredd cover art (where issues featured it as opposed to cover art for other storylines as 2000 AD is an anthology comic), typically at the end of the volume.

Worse, it was the cover for the wrong episode, symbolising what a mess this epic was. As you can see from the cover (if you zoom in), it was the cover of prog 848 – which was the seventh episode of the Inferno epic (titled Death Dance).

 

 

The cover art would actually appear to correspond to prog 852 or the epic’s 11th (and second last) episode – particularly this scene evoking the titular inferno as Dredd confronts Grice (again) while the latter is burning down the Hall of Justice with a flamethrower.

My assumption is that Bolland was given the description or draft art for this episode by inadvertence or mistake for the cover art of the earlier episode which featured nothing like this scene.

This scene also shows us how Dredd gets out of this one. He shoots the floor – for which Grice mocks him in this panel – into the flooded iso-cube cell hallway conveniently right below him, allow him to escape by swimming (and extinguishing the fire while he’s at it).

Dredd retrieves his Lawmaster and has another showdown with Grice outside the Hall of Justice. He finally just shoots at Grice, but then seems reluctant to get another shot in to finish Grice off, allowing Grice to go hand to hand with Dredd – seemingly poised to strike the final blow to Dredd…

 

 

JUDGE DREDD CASE FILES 19:

INFERNO 12 – Mortal Kombat! (prog 853)

 

Grice comes to a grisly end at the wheels of Dredd’s Lawmaster – and so too does Inferno with that Bond one-liner “What’s the matter, Grice? Feeling run down?”

If there’s a running theme (heh) to Inferno, it’s that protagonist Dredd and antagonist Grice spend too much time monologuing at each other rather than just finishing the other off or just shooting him. At least Dredd breaks the habit enough here to have his Lawmaster finish Grice off first before shooting off his one-liner.

And that pretty much wraps up Inferno, but for the usual epilogue bits. As the episode itself narrates, “Grice’s coup is collapsing” – and the coup finishes collapsing with the Judges led by Hershey regaining the city and either killing or capturing Grice’s renegade ex-Judges from Titan. And I suppose also whatever Judges defected to him in the city itself, presumably for the antidote – Grice mentions them but we never see any. What we do see is the last of them – Grice’s renegades – loaded onto a robot-crewed spaceship to be shipped right back to Titan.

Oh – and Hershey casually mentions that they won’t be able to produce enough of the antidote for all the citizens, so there’s going to be a death toll. How many? Who knows, other than Hershey quipping resyk will be working overtime and Dredd quipping back fewer citizens means less crime. It’s lazy writing. Just like we never see when or how the Judges captured the antidote from the renegade Judges – it would have been nice to feature a panel to show this, perhaps even some surrendering renegades offering it up for amnesty.

Speaking of amnesty, you didn’t think they were really shipping the renegade Judges back to Titan, did you? Where presumably they’d just escape all over again, maybe next week? Not on Dredd’s watch! Yeah…Dredd’s not doing that Batman putting the Joker back in Arkham Asylum and the whole revolving door prison thing. Instead he pushes the button and pulls a gotcha on the Titan escapees.

 

 

Nice if somewhat predictable twist but did he really have to waste the ship and robots for it, not to mention the elaborate ploy? And so Inferno ends with a bang – although really epic itself was a story not with a bang but a whimper.

 

 

JUDGE DREDD CASE FILES 19:

WAR GAMES (prog 854)

 

“Judge Dredd! For crimes against justice — you are sentenced to death!”

Finally – a bright shining light in the darkness that is Case Files 19 with my favorite episode, at least among the regular 2000 AD episodes and apart from the Megazine.

Unfortunately, it does have its problems and I’ll get to those, but they do not so much arise from the episode itself as the failure to do anything with it subsequently (and its timing as the very next episode after Inferno).

But what’s not to love about that very first panel, with our very first look at the Chinese or Sino-Cit Judges, rendered in superb art by Paul Marshall? Of course, that would be Sino-Cit 2 as Sino-Cit 1 was overrun by zombies in Judgement Day and nuked.

I mean, just look at them! Those uniforms come very close to knocking off those of the Sov Judges and Mega-City One Judges from their pedestal as my favorite. But for the fact that we don’t see them again for many episodes (as I have difficulty recalling their reappearance in the regular episodes) and then only after changing their uniforms, they might well be my favorite Judge uniforms.

I believe that they toned down the uniforms – which is frankly outrageous. If anything, they should have toned them up! But they’re perfect as they are. I note that there appears to be two regular Judge uniforms and one in a more senior or commanding position, although both uniform designs are in the red and yellow designs of the present Chinese flag.

As for the regular Judges, there’s the helmets styled in the traditional conical Asian design. The dragons as shoulder pad similar to the eagle for Mega-City One Judges. The Chinese characters which I presume to be their name, similar to the badges for Mega-City One Judges. The only issue I have is the shuriken belt buckles – which are a bit too much and also a potential source of injury.

The senior or commanding Judge has a similar coloring and design – but with some big boss shoulder pads going on and a dragon helmet. He also has skulls on his collar and badge, suggestive of perhaps a similar role to the SJS in Mega-City One, as well as a giant Chinese character on his chest.

And we’re still just in the very first panel – but I haven’t finished admiring it. You just have to love that grin on the Sino-Cit Judge on the right.

Of course, it’s the Sino-Cit Judges that are in trouble here. It’s that old adage – Dredd’s not locked in there with them, they’re locked in there with him…

 

 

“Not just Sino-Cit Judges, imperialist pig!”

Sino-Cit Judges and Sov Judges and stomm – oh my!

Yes, yes – just bask in that glory of Paul Marshall’s art in these panels from this episode, particularly as we have so few episodes like it in Case Files 19.

Despite being strapped into what appears to be an electric chair for his execution by the Sino-Cit Judges, with a leap Dredd is free! And suddenly armed with two Lawgivers to take them out instead, allowing us to get a look at the back of those Sino-Cit Judge uniforms and see they’re even cooler with the yin-yang symbols on the back.

But no sooner has Dredd escaped from the Sino-Cit Judges, calling for backup from Control (“We’ve got a nest of Sino-Cit Judges right here in Mega-City!”) then he is ambushed by a nest of Sov Judges, prompting an expletive of “stomm” from Dredd.

Or dare I say it, the stomm-bomb! So little used compared to the much more popular f-word substitute drokk. I believe stomm is the s-word equivalent. You often get a good drokk in Judge Dredd but you rarely get a good stomm. Mind you, we also get a good drokk coming up…

 

 

“You failed, Dredd! Welcome to hell!”

Sino-Cit Judges and Sov Judges and drokking hell – oh my!

Out of the frying pan, into the hellfire. The Grand Hall of Justice in flames and Dredd overwhelmed by SJS zombies.

 Just what the hell is going on?!

 

 

And it was all a dream!

Well, by dream I mean experimental psychotropic drug hallucination.

If anything, that’s even darker in some ways than the literal hellscape we saw in Dredd’s drug-fuelled nightmare vision – and as much as I love this episode, that’s where my problems with it start.

Not so much with the darkness of it – that Justice Department is prepared to resort to some extremely callous calculus from grim desperation. The callousness is obvious with the pile of poor chumps that Dredd has brutally killed in his literal drug psychosis and whom McGruder even calls “guinea pigs” – “Perps…we picked them up this afternoon — most of them minor offences but we needed some guinea pigs”.

Good Grud! Picked them up this afternoon? Minor offences?! You may have needed guinea pigs but you need them that badly and that quickly? You couldn’t have, say, used more serious offenders? You know, death row inmates – or the equivalent, as Mega-City One doesn’t have the death penalty…mostly.

Also…did they arm these chumps with, ah, spatulas or fly swatters? And I’m sure one of them just had a skateboard?  Against Dredd with a daystick and Lawgiver?!

Of course, they probably didn’t want anyone – or anything – more dangerous against Dredd, as they doped him to the eyeballs with their experimental “new aggro drug”. That’s the other part of their callous calculus here – the risk to their own Judge, let alone a Judge of the stature of Dredd, from an untested drug affecting their sensory awareness and perception, let alone doing so in some sort of extreme combat simulation to the death. What if it had incapacitated him, of itself or in combat? Not to mention they went all MK-Ultra with it – doing it without his consent or even knowledge.

It prompts to mind the official use of methylamphetamine in World War Two, originally for its perceived performance enhancement but ultimately banned for its negative effects – presumably including a deterioration of that performance (and one anticipates quite a bit of friendly fire).

But my problem is bigger than that. There’s the timing of it – literally the next episode after Inferno. What about Dredd recovering from his injuries, let alone McGruder?

However, the biggest problem is that they do exactly nothing with it – neither with its premise nor with the drug, both of which are never seen again. The premise is essentially one of grim desperation – “according to Psi-Division, there’s a crisis coming on. At our current depleted strength, we’re not strong enough to deal with it”. That crisis is further stated – or rather predicted – to be 18 months away or less, originating in the eastern blocks. “Somethin’ bad is headed this way”.

Spoiler alert – it isn’t and didn’t. While it is on brand for Psi Division to be useless as usual, that’s probably on the writers. No doubt the writing team – including Mark Millar who wrote the episode – intended and planned for something big and bad to hit Mega-City One, but they must have quietly dropped that story idea, whatever it was.

As for that drug tested on Dredd, no doubt it would have come in useful for Mega-City One’s Judges once they ironed out the kinks, not least in one of the crises that did come to Mega-City One, but again they must have quietly dropped it as story idea.

 

 

JUDGE DREDD CASE FILES 19:

JUDGE TYRANNOSAUR (prog 855)

 

“Stomping citizens is illegal, meat-mouth! You’re toast!”

You may be cool but will you ever be Judge Dredd taking out a T-rex with a flamethrower cool?

And that’s pretty much the point of this episode (which wraps up the regular 2000 AD episodes in this volume) but I’m always a fun of Jurassic Dredd – whenever dinosaurs pop up in the comic. Although by dinosaurs, let’s face it – it’s almost always tyrannosaurs. Or is that T-rexes?

There is another point of the episode – yet another episode showing Mega-City One’s citizens to be lovable idiots, although the lovable part may be an acquired taste. They’re certainly idiots – which is where the Judge Tyrannosaur of the episode title comes into play.

You guessed it – by contrived but fortuitous happenstance, a tyrannosaur that has wandered a long way from its Cursed Earth home to Mega-City One just happens to eat the right person, a perp holding Mega-City One’s “favorite granny” or oldest citizen hostage for ransom. This happens at the West Wall – the art suggests at one of the gaps still in the wall, so it may have been even more fortuitous that the tyrannosaur slipped through the gap at just the right time.

Although mind you, I’d have expected the oldest citizen to be older than 130 years in twenty-second century Mega-City One. I seem to recall body transplants in one episode.

Anyway, naturally Mega-City One’s lovable idiot citizens in the crowd hail the tyrannosaur as hero – with one oddball “Jurassic expert”, transparently named Dr Michael Crichton, lobbying for it to be made a Judge. How and why the tyrannosaur was taken inside (or further inside) the city, let alone restrained in chains, is not clear. Nor is why the Judges at the hostage situation either did it or let the citizens do it.

However, Judge Dredd is not having anything to do with this mother-drokking dinosaur in his mother-drokking city – “This nonsense has gone far enough!”

And just as well too, since that fortuitously coincides with the tyrannosaur escaping from its bounds just as the citizens were about to give it a giant Judge’s badge. It doesn’t seem to eat anyone but does stomp on the unfortunate Dr Crichton, despite him keeping still – as he tells the panicked citizens, the tyrannosaur responds to sudden movement (another nod to Jurassic Park). Hence the rebuke by Dredd to the dinosaur, before he fries it and finishes it off with a high explosive round.

As he tells the citizens, they don’t need heroes, dinosaurs or otherwise – “You citizens don’t need heroes – you already got us! Appreciate it!”

 

 

JUDGE DREDD CASE FILES 19:

THE HOTTIE HOUSE SIEGE (Meg 2.31)

The Jigsaw Murders (Meg 2.27 – 2.29)

Ladonna Fever (Meg 2.30)

 

“They practice progressive lobotomy…They have bits of their brains systematically burnt out to bring them closer to Grud. Ignorance is bliss, as they say.”

Normally I feature just one notable or standout story from the Megazine episodes in a Case Files volume, but there’s a four from this volume – one as my favorite episode in the volume, even above War Games in the regular 2000 AD episodes, and three for storylines that were to continue or recur in later regular episodes.

Of course, that might say something for the Dark Age of Dredd in the regular episodes at this time – allowing for the episodes in the Megazine, which I think were written by Judge Dredd’s best writer, John Wagner, to shine.

Although not so much in the first two storylines in the Meg – the Jigsaw Murders in the three Megazine episodes 2.27-2.29 and Ladonna Fever in Megazine 2.30.

The former is a ho-hum story about a deranged serial killer targeting a replacement arm for surgery to replaced his own amputated one but I’ll admit the latter is fun – an obvious parody of Madonna and her performances at the time. Naturally they breach Mega-City One’s public decency laws but Dredd hadn’t anticipated the city-wide riots in response to her arrest. They pull a fast one releasing her before serving her thirty year sentence – by releasing her after serving it, via some sort of “time stretcher”. Now she’d unappealingly old to the Mega-City crowds. Even better, her management contracts expired after three years – so her contracts no longer protects her records and assets are confiscated by the city. Hmm – I’m not sure it would work that way, as only Ladonna went through the time-stretcher. Interestingly, she apparently was a model citizen before her transformation into a pop star (essentially through total body plastic surgery). American actress and Madonna associate Sarah Bernhard is name-dropped for the block citi-def in which Ladonna served with exemplary record – during Necropolis or the Big Nec, which is somewhat surprising as Citi-Def resistance was omitted from the epic itself.

The Hottie House siege – an obvious satire of the Branch Davidian cult and its leader David Koresh, famously besieged by federal law enforcement at Waco in Texas – proved such a popular storyline that it was to recur in subsequent episodes. Mega-City One’s Branch Moronians – led here by David Wacovitz – were just the black comedy gift that kept on giving. A nice comic touch is the one or two members who lag behind other cult members in lobotomy and are therefore smarter. Not much smarter, of course, but enough to constantly trigger their leader David Wacovitz – although he implicitly relies on them for his plan of taking the hot dog outlet or Hottie House hostage to have any coherence or indeed purpose. Although even with those members lifting up the bell curve, the whole thing is doomed and Dredd takes out the cult single-handed.

 

 

JUDGE DREDD CASE FILES 19:

SLICK DICKENS: DRESSED TO KILL (Meg 2.34-2.35)

The Al Capone Story (Meg 2.32)

Bagging the Bagwan (Meg 2.33)

 

Judge Dredd does literary criticism!

“Thought you killed me in your last one, Kaput?…I’m giving you another five years for this pile of garbage!”

The most amusing thing about this all is that Dredd obviously read the book to pick plot points, pixie dust and all .

That book being the latest Slick Dickens book – Slick Dickens: Dressed to Kill – by Truman Kaput, an obvious play on Truman Capote. We last saw Kaput and his literary creation, sartorial hitman extraordinaire Slick Dickens, all the way back in episode 505 in Case Files Volume 10 – when Kaput found himself doing cube time for practising the crimes in his Slick Dickens book for realism. Dredd obviously read that book too (as he sentenced Kaput for practising other crimes in the book) – he’s a fan!

When he was introduced, Kaput had his literary creation kill Dredd – hence Dredd’s dry observation “Thought you killed me in your last one, Kaput?”

In these two Megazine episode, Kaput’s written a sequel – in his characteristic overblown style – in which Slick is back to finish the job, which has his fictional Dredd spooked. Well, his more fictional Dredd – as opposed to our fictional Dredd, who is less than impressed. Hence the five years Dredd adds to Kaput’s sentence – personally, I think Dredd just wants him to write another sequel and gave him the time to do it.

The preceding two Megazine episodes were also interesting but do not reflect a recurring character like Slick Dickens.

The first episode, The Al Capone Story (Megazine 2.32) features its titular protagonist growing up as a disappointment to his thuggish family – placid, good-natured and intelligence. That’s in marked contrast to Herman Schwartz, born on the same day to the next door neighbors of the Capones, and a constant terror in his delinquent behaviour, although the two boys become best friends. Capone’s father pre-empts the twist in the tale, bemoaning whether there was a mix-up at the block hospital – although Al Capone ultimately lives up to his name, imprisoned for tax fraud (albeit doing better than Schwartz, killed in a shootout with Judge Dredd on his way to arresting Capone).

People name-dropped for blocks include the mob bodyguard and successor to Capone, Frank Nitti (for the birthplace block of the two boys), gangster Joe Bananas (from Joseph Bonanno – for the block the families move to), and white collar criminal financier Michael Milken (for the block in which Capone settles down). I don’t know – it seems unlikely Justice Department would approve naming blocks for notorious twentieth century criminal figures.

The second episode, Bagging the Bagwan (Megazine 2.33) features Dredd having to protect a Dalai Lama-like figure – except less a figure of resistance and more a figure of annoying pacifist obsequiousness (his religion is named kowtowism) – from assassins hoping to claim the fifty million credit put on the Bagwan’s head by the Organization of Extremist City States. Sadly, as far as I know that organization is never featured again and we are not told anything about which cities are members of it – although they’re probably the usual suspects of villainous mega-cities in Judge Dredd.

 

 

JUDGE DREDD CASE FILES 19:

REVENGE OF THE EGGHEAD (Meg 2.36)

 

“Of course, why didn’t I think of it before! I’ll tranquillise the whole block!”

And believe me – this block needs tranquillising.

Ironically named after Kenneth Clark (albeit with misspelt surname Clarke), British art historian and TV presenter of Civilization, there’s not much civilization in this block, populated with the dregs of Mega-City One. As one of its own residents proudly proclaims, “this is a low IQ block”.

Which makes it all the more strange that Egward Shelduk, university nerd with a penchant for chemistry, lives there – but the answer is quickly revealed that it’s a Department of Housing mistake. Although to say he lives in the block is an overstatement – survives might be more accurate. And barely at that – even then it looks like he won’t last much longer.

By the way, this is it – my favorite single episode in Case Files 19. Yes – even more than War Games, because unlike War Games it actually goes somewhere, in self-contained fashion to boot. Also yes – I’m just as surprised as you are that it was not one of the regular 2000 AD episodes, usually the source of my favorite episodes, but one of the Megazine episodes. But perhaps not too surprised – this was the Dark Age of Dredd in the regular episodes after all.

My favorite Judge Dredd episodes often resemble the finest Greek tragedies. Yes – I stand by that comparison, with the common element being that the best Judge Dredd black comedy and the best Greek tragedy boil down to their tragic hero falling through no flaw or fault of their own but from being screwed over by fate. Indeed, often the tragic hero fights against their fate, only to bring it about or make it worse – the tougher they fight, the harder they fall.

Which is exactly what we see with Egward here – he tries to do everything right to peacefully avoid the relentless and violent bullying by his neighbors, only for none of it to work. We see the conga humiliation line pile-up in messages – his girlfriend leaves him a Dear John letter by video message as she can no longer see someone living in “that block” and his house loan application is turned down because his block is classified as “high risk”.

Worst of all, the Department of Housing pulls a good news bad news joke on him. The good news is that they have identified their mistake – he apparently was meant to be housed at Swingle Singers Swinging Singles – and are “rectifying their mistake immediately”. The bad news is that by immediately – or their “urgent priority” list – they mean the year after next.

The worse news is that Egward isn’t going to make it to the day after next the way he’s going, let alone the year after next. So again he does the right thing – he calls in Justice Department on his assailants. Of course, Justice Department shows up in the form of Dredd. Egward pleads with Dredd – “I don’t want any trouble – if you could just have a word with them.” Unfortunately for Egward, Dredd doesn’t do just having words with perps. Dredd arrests the family of bullies and now the whole block is out for Egward – “No judge to protect ya now, egghead!”

And that’s when Egward gets his bright idea – to tranquillise the whole block. “It’s so simple! I can make it up myself from common chemicals you’d find in any highly advanced laboratory!”. Sadly, nothing in Mega-City One is ever simple…

 

 

“Control! Med-wagons to Kenneth Clarke! We have a mass gassing!”

You sure do, Judge Dredd, you sure do. And how!

But also – and how? Well, we know the how. Block egghead Egward Selduk tranquillised the whole block. You know, to avoid being killed by the other occupants, which seems reasonable to me.

Not so much to Justice Department, who are alerted to the block being tranquillised when the crime in and around Kenneth Clarke drops to zero – “Normally we’d expect a crime every three minutes!”

Judge Dredd is called in to investigate and with the protection of his helmet respirator uncovers that everyone in Kenneth Clarke is out cold. Well, except Egward who protected himself with nose filters.

But that’s getting ahead of our story. Dredd disables the tranquilliser gas feed and the block residents awaken, in an even more violent mood than usual and ready to rumble. Or riot in this case – such that Dredd has to call in reinforcements who deploy my favorite Justice Department feature, riot foam.

And right then with the riot quelled Dredd’s off to deal with the perpetrator…

 

 

“You put the whole block to sleep, creep!”

“But that’s impossible! The – the tranquilliser wasn’t strong enough!”

“Not on its own, maybe — but combined with the tranquilliser WE pump into the block system –”

Ah yes – Mega-City One Justice Department tranquillizing its own citizens again. And yet again another citizen who discovers it – by mishap in this case – paying the price. Which for poor Egward Selduk is twenty years in the cubes.

And I for one will not stand for this – justice for Egward!

For one thing, it sounds like Justice Department should have been upping the dose. As Judge Dredd tells Egward, Justice Department’s tranquillizer was “just enough to keep them under control”. I’m not so sure about that, given that whole “crime every three minutes” thing.

For another, Egward had little choice to avoid being killed by other block residents – having tried everything else, including calling in Judge Dredd, none of which worked. He then chose a non-violent means of protecting himself – which would have worked but for Justice Department doing it first, outside his knowledge and obviously not as effectively.

And one last thing – Egward is exactly the sort of person Justice Department should be looking to enlist as a civilian auxiliary. Drokk – Justice Department in general and Judge Dredd in particularly cut deals to conscript peepers to use their spying for the city. Why not the same here? On his own and without any of the experience or resources of Justice Department, Egward tranquillised a whole block, peacefully putting it to sleep to protect himself and dropping its crime rate down to zero. Sure, the block rioted when they woke up, but you could argue that’s on Dredd for disabling the tranquillizer gas without calling in any Tek Division support or other Judges to deal with the citizens as they roused beforehand. So why not cut Egward a deal to conscript him as an auxiliary for Tek Division rather than encubement?

Although you do have to love Dredd’s wry observation at how he was able to identify Egward as the perpetrator – “No one else in the block is smart enough!”

 

 

JUDGE DREDD CASE FILES 19:

MECHANISMO – BODY COUNT (Meg 2.37 – Meg 2.43)

 

And we wrap up Case Files 19 with the ongoing Mechanismo storyline in the Megazine episodes. For me, it was more like Meh-chanismo (heh) but it had too big an impact for me to ignore in my Mega-City Law – and one that would continue for many more episodes yet. It makes quite the Megazine episode tally for Case Files 19. Normally I just feature the best Megazine episode, Revenge of the Egghead in this case (heh), but Case Files 19 had three recurring storylines which had to be featured – Slick Dickens: Dressed to Kill, Hottie House Siege, but the most important of all was Mechanismo: Body Count.

I’ll be quick about it, however, because none of the Mechanismo storyline really grabbed me – except for the climactic and fateful decision by Dredd here.

Judge Stitch – the Tek-Division Judge who masterminded the Mechanismo robot Judge project – is continuing with his insane pet project searching the sewers for his little lost robot which malfunctioned with lethal consequences, Mechanismo Number Five, having escaped psychiatric treatment to do so.

Meanwhile, Chief Judge McGruder is continuing with her pet project to fill the city’s depleted Judge ranks with robot Judges, rolling out the Mark Two models a year after the failure of the original Mark One models, not least Number Five – while Dredd continues to oppose robot Judges.

And Number Five is still out there continuing its pet project of law enforcement with ever more extreme prejudice. It’s pretty much executions all round for Number Five

McGruder conceives the perfect operational trial for the Mark Two models – search and destroy for the rogue Number Five. Dredd opposes this as well but realizes that he has only one option to prevent the Mark Two models becoming fully operational – find Number Five first.

And he does just that, tracking it through the illegal salvage crew that found and reactivated it, but unfortunately it manages to evade him into the sewers – where he, one of the Mark Two units, and Judge Stitch all converge on it. Dredd has already disabled it with a well-aimed shot and disables it further with another, but the Mark Two that destroys it despite Dredd’s order to “hold your fire!”

And that’s when Dredd does the darker side of his catchphrase by taking the law into his own hands – shooting and destroying the Mark Two unit. Dredd compounds this by exploiting the extremely impressionable state of the onlooking Judge Stitch (in his psychiatric breakdown) to effectively implant that the two robot Judges had destroyed each other.

As Dredd muses to himself – “A deception, but necessary under the circumstances. Enough to make McGruder pull back from commissioning the Mark 2s — for a while at least. Long enough to figure out how to deal with McGruder…”

And yes – you know that Dredd is just kicking the can down the road but it’s going to have some big consequences when it catches up to him, or he to it. I forget how that metaphor works. Sometimes you catch the can and sometimes the can catches you, but it’s going to have some big consequences in either case.