Top Tens – Film: Top 10 Shark Horror Films

 

 

Poster art – Shark Bait (2022)

 

For instant horror, just add sharks!

Also just add sharks for an instant Top 10 Shark Horror Films!

Although to be honest, once you get past my top shark horror film, shark horror tends to be well, schlock.

 

1 – Jaws (the original and still the best shark horror film, although even the Jaws franchise couldn’t escape shark schlock in the sequels)

After Jaws in the top spot, I rank them alphabetically because there’s not much difference between them.

2 – 47 Meters Down (with at least one sequel – with those mutated cave sharks)

3 – Bait (the one with the tsunami sharks – in Australia!)

4 – Deep Blue Sea (genetically engineered brainy sharks – with a sequel!)

5 – Great White (res ipsa loquitur)

6 – The Meg (megalodon shark horror)

7 – Open Water (based on a true story from Australia – with at least two sequels)

8 – The Reef (another film set in Australia)

9 – The Shallows (a great white so filled with rage against humans that it doesn’t even care about a juicy whale carcass)

10 – Shark Night (where humans are the real villain, wanting to feed other humans to sharks – same shtick as Dangerous Animals in 2025)

 

SPECIAL MENTION: ALLIGATOR & CROCODILE HORROR – CRAWL & ROGUE

 

While nowhere near as prolific as shark horror films – which always seem to have a few films breach each year – I have almost as much as soft spot for alligator and crocodile horror films. I’d nominate Crawl as my favorite for the former and Rogue as my favorite for the latter.

 

Top Tens – Fantasy & SF: Top 10 Fantasy Books (Special Mention: Cult & Pulp) (9) Richard Kadrey – Sandman Slim

Cover art from Killing Pretty, seventh book in the series

 

 

 

(9) RICHARD KADREY –

SANDMAN SLIM (2009 – 2021)

 

How could I resist a hero – or anti-hero – named Stark? No simple revenant clawing his way out of the grave – James Stark or the titular Sandman Slim is a revenant who claws his way like a badass out of hell. Literally. The first book (and series) had me at hell – I have a soft spot for heroes back from the dead, or even better, gone to hell and back. Stark is a naturally talented magician (not wizard, because wizarding is for wimps like Harry Potter) in the secret magical underworld of Los Angeles and falls afoul of one of his colleagues, who sends him straight to hell, before stealing the keys to the universe to return to our world for revenge on those who dealt out his damnation. And that’s just where the first book starts!

The other books in the series up the ante even more – from hell coming to Los Angeles and Los Angeles going to hell…

The series might well be described as dark fantasy noir or occult detective fiction, sharply written with an engaging cast of characters, not least Sandman Slim himself (whom I can’t help but picture as author Richard Kadrey). If you read contemporary fantasy, you must read Sandman Slim. Where the hell is the screen adaptation?

 

RATING:
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Heart of Starkness – Eightfold Path 7: I believe in the god of doubt (zen catholicism)

OldWorldGods – divine gallery free art sample

 

 

I believe in the god of doubt –

the sound of one hand clapping,

a tree falling in a forest,

a finger pointing at the moon,

your face before you were born,

the goose in a bottle,

and three pounds of flax

(zen catholicism)

*

*

my horns won’t fit through the door!

Top Tens – Film: Top 10 Slasher Horror Films

 

2010 film poster

 

“Here, we can see a slasher movie killer in their natural habitat, stalking the final girl.”

I tend to prefer other sub-genres of horror to slasher horror but the latter is so iconic of the horror film genre in general that I have to rank it in my S-tier or god-tier special mentions, particularly with the iconic visual design of their slashers.

They have become so prolific as to define their own film genre, one worthy of their own top ten list many times over just for their themes, tropes and types, as well as by iconic slasher.

Anyway, here’s my Top 10 Slasher Films (and their iconic slashers) on the spot.

 

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1 – WES CRAVEN – NIGHTMARE ON ELM STREET (FREDDY KRUEGER)

 

My favorite slasher film franchise – the combination of slasher horror with supernatural dream-haunting demon is hard to beat. Wes Craven has also proved one of the more capable directors as creator of slasher horror (and horror in general).

While iconic, Freddy is not the most iconic slasher – that title has to go to the duo of my next two entries

 

2 – JOHN CARPENTER – HALLOWEEN (MICHAEL MYERS)

 

That iconic William Shatner mask. And hello again, Mr Carpenter.

 

3 – FRIDAY THE 13TH (JASON VORHEES)

 

That iconic hockey mask

 

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4 – WES CRAVEN – SCREAM (GHOSTFACE)

 

Hello again, Mr Craven. Yeah – we’re very much in the self-referential phase of slasher canon here, with Scream as its definitive franchise.

 

5 – SAW (JIGSAW)

 

Yes – less slasher and more torture p0rn but I’m still ranking it here as close enough. And yes – it’s not so much the killer that’s iconic as that damn puppet. “You want to play a game?”

 

6 – TEXAS CHAINSAW MASSACRE (LEATHERFACE)

 

Title says it all really – as does the slasher’s nom de slash.

 

7 – CHILD’S PLAY (CHUCKY)

 

If a dream-demon like Freddy Kreuger can be a slasher, why not a possessed doll? Well, apart from the size thing, which makes Chucky a little hard to take seriously – hence why he’s not in the top iconic slashers.

 

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8 – WES CRAVEN – THE HILLS HAVE EYES

 

Hello again, Mr Craven. I’ll rank this here – namely because of the lack of a similarly iconic slasher among its hillbilly mutant cannibal tribe (and also because said tribe strays somewhat from the archetypal slasher film).

 

9 – I KNOW WHAT YOU DID LAST SUMMER

 

A distant second to the Scream franchise as representative of the self-referential phase of slasher canon – also that hook guy just doesn’t have the same iconic status or visual design as the top slashers.

 

10 – WOLF CREEK

 

Australian slasher horror!

Although again John Jarratt’s Mick Taylor isn’t as iconic a slasher.

 

SPECIAL MENTION

 

1 – CLASSICAL SLASHER HORROR (1974-1993)

 

According to Wikipedia “the slasher canon can be divided into three eras: the classical (1974–1993), the self-referential (1994–2000) and the neoslasher cycle (2000–2013)”.

Within the classical era, there’s the Golden Age of slasher films from 1978 to 1984 – which would include the first Halloween, Friday the 13th, and Nightmare on Elm Street films.

Prior to the Golden Age, there was The Texas Chainsaw Massacre and The Hills Have Eyes, while after it the classical era included Chucky – hence the classical era included seven of my top ten entries.

 

2 – SELF-REFERENTIAL SLASHER HORROR (1994-2000)

 

Scream is the archetypal self-referential slasher horror. I Know What You Did Last Summer was also from this era.

 

3 – NEO-SLASHER HORROR / POSTMODERN SLASHER HORROR (2000-2013)

 

Wolf Creek is my top ten entry from this era

 

4 – EVIL DEAD

 

Yeah, my top horror film doesn’t really fall into slasher horror but I include it in special mention because of Ash’s nickname Ashy Slashy. Also the Deadites are somewhat similar to slashers – and the iconic cabin in the woods is similar to your archetypal slasher setting (of Camp Crystal Lake).

Speaking of which

 

5 – THE CABIN IN THE WOODS

 

As a metafictional horror, slashers feature among the monsters used by the Organization – arguably including the zombie redneck torture family (the Buckner family) picked in the film.

 

6 – ALIEN & TERMINATOR

 

I mean, they’re not slashers but they essentially operate by slasher tropes…although you could say that of most horror film antagonists.

 

7 – PSYCHO

 

Precursor and inspiration for slasher horror – it also gives us an iconic horror figure with Norman Bates

 

8 – THE HITCHER

 

As I rank it in my Top 10 Horror Films and it definitely overlaps with slasher horror, I have to give it a shout out here.

 

9 – SILENCE OF THE LAMBS & AMERICAN PSYCHO

Two of the most (in)famous serial killers in cinema – Hannibal Lecter and Patrick Bateman – influenced and an influence on slasher horror films, although they obviously depart from the slasher archetype in a number of ways.

 

 

Top Tens – Fantasy & SF: Top 10 Fantasy Books (Special Mention: Classic) (9) Edgar Rice Burroughs – Tarzan

Cover art of Tarzan Alive by Philip Jose Farmer published in 2006 by Bison

 

 

(9) EDGAR RICE BURROUGHS –

TARZAN (1912 – 1966)

 

Tarzan is the most iconic hero of fantasy and science fiction – the archetypal jungle hero (or perhaps modern barbarian hero), in a series of books by Edgar Rice Burroughs. The start of the series is easy to date to “Tarzan of the Apes” in 1912 – the end of the series less so but I’ve dated it to “Tarzan and the Valley of Gold” in 1966, authorized as the 25th official Tarzan novel by the Burroughs estate.

Born John Clayton and heir to English aristocracy as Lord Greystoke (or more precisely Viscount Greystoke), Tarzan was marooned with his aristocrat parents and ‘adopted’ after their deaths by a maternal female ape within a ‘tribe’ of great apes – indeed, Tarzan is his name in the ape language.

Philip Jose Farmer condensed Tarzan’s fictional ‘biography’ from the series by Edgar Rice Burroughs into his book Tarzan Alive, which is essentially my central reference to Tarzan (and exclusively so after the first two books). Farmer was an enduring fan of the character and wrote of Tarzan (or his world) in a number of books – most infamously in A Feast Unknown, featuring a thinly veiled pastiche of Tarzan and Doc Savage, or most famously, in his so-called Wold Newton Universe, where he linked together a number of fictional superheroes to the effect of a meteorite.

And I say superheroes as Tarzan has virtually superhuman abilities. After all, we’re talking someone who has wrestled virtually every animal, including full grown bull apes and gorillas. In short, he easily out-Batmans Batman and is the Superman of the jungle.

He is also of superhuman intelligence – a feature not readily discerned from the unfortunate monosyllabic and broken English of his screen adaptations. In the books – indeed, the first book – he could read English before he could speak it, having taught himself to read from the children’s picture books left in his parents’ log cabin and deducing the symbols as a language, in complete isolation from humans. He also spoke French before he spoke English, learning it from the first European he encountered. He readily learns to speak English – as well as thirty or so languages after that. So much for “Me Tarzan, you Jane”.

Despite a certain lack of plausibility, he remains an enduring hero – a “daydream figure” who obviously appeals to our continuing fascination for an animal or nature hero (and perhaps less fortunately to a ‘white god’ figure)

 

RATING:

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Top Tens – Film: Top 10 Religious Horror Films

 

One of the most iconic images of religious horror – Damien – from one of the two most iconic religious horror films – The Omen

 

The original horror, preceding horror in film and indeed as old as dirt – horror in religion, with the source of the horror as the antagonistic supernatural beings of that religion. In Western popular culture, that religion is Christianity – usually defaulting to Catholicism. Hence the supernatural beings will usually be the Devil, demons or other forces of Hell – with exorcism and possession often featuring prominently as the opposing sides of the battlefield.

No prizes for guessing the top two entries, which for me will always be the two leading religious horror films – but there’s other religious horror films, enough for this top ten, but those two are the biggest.

So here’s my Top 10 Religious Horror Films on the spot

 

S-TIER (DEVIL TIER)

 

1 – THE OMEN (1976)

 

Damien!

Antichrist horror.

And yes – it spawned a franchise. The first two sequels were okay enough but neither equalled the first film. 2024 saw The First Omen as a decent prequel.

 

2 – THE EXORCIST (1973)

 

Another franchise – the title gives you the basic premise.

 

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3 – ROSEMARY’S BABY (1968)

 

More Antichrist horror

 

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4 – AMITYVILLE HORROR (1979)

 

Iconic haunted house horror – or rather, possessed house horror. Also spawned a franchise.

 

5 – ANGEL HEART (1987)

 

Seemingly starts off as film noir, ends up as religious horror. Nice turn by Robert De Niro – going by the transparent moniker Louis Cypher.

 

6 – THE EXORCISM OF EMILY ROSE (2005)

 

More exorcism horror

 

7 – PARANORMAL ACTIVITY (2007)

 

More haunted house horror – or rather, haunted family horror. Also spawned a franchise, albeit with ever diminishing returns in quality.

 

8 – THE CONJURING (2013)

 

More haunted or possessed house horror, even if I otherwise think of the Warrens, like all mediums or psychics, as frauds. Yet another franchise – I’m also counting the Annabelle and Nun spinoffs, the latter being even more religious horror than the Conjuring

 

9 – HEREDITARY (2018)

 

More haunted family horror, similar to the premise of Paranormal Activity – but without the stretches of nothing on “found footage”.

 

10 – LATE NIGHT WITH THE DEVIL (2023)

 

Sadly not Satan hosting a late night TV show but that’s close enough to the premise for the film

 

HONORABLE MENTION:

 

(1997 – 1999) THE DEVIL’S ADVOCATE  & END OF DAYS

 

Not really horror – more supernatural thriller, hence the honorable mention. There was just a thing about the upcoming millennium that saw these two films with the similar premise of an apocalyptic plot for the birth of the Antichrist.

 

(1998) FALLEN

 

A serial killer turns out to be something else.

Top Tens – Film: Top 10 Folk Horror Films

 

 

Classic film poster art for The Wicker Man

 

 

“Who are these coming to the sacrifice?”

Folk horror is a subgenre of horror fiction or film – indeed, arguably a sub-genre of religious horror, except based on elements of folklore, supernatural or otherwise, “to invoke fear and foreboding”.

“Typical elements include a rural setting, isolation, and themes of superstition, folk religion, paganism, sacrifice and the dark aspects of nature”.

The original “unholy trinity” identified as folk horror were three British films in the 1960s-1970s – Witchfinder General (1968), The Blood on Satan’s Claw (1971) and my own personal archetype of folk horror (as well as second favorite horror film of all time), The Wicker Man (1973).

It’s tight (and I have to squint a bit at some films to make them fit) but I can just squeeze out a Folk Horror top ten on the spot – and even a few special mentions.

 

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1 – THE WICKER MAN (1973)

 

The archetypal folk horror film, eerie and otherworldly without any supernatural elements. Second place in my Top 10 Horror Films.

 

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2 – PICNIC AT HANGING ROCK (1975)

 

“Miranda!”

Light on the horror (as opposed to mystery) but the film is cited as eerie and otherworldly Australian folk horror centered around the titular landmark. The mystery at its heart is left unanswered but suggests the supernatural (which turned out to be true according to the answer to the mystery in the final chapter eventually published by the author of the book on which it is based – and a little underwhelming).

Also how has this not had an adult film parody version (well, apart from being too “artsy” and niche a film)? There’s naughty schoolgirls – and the title basically writes itself.

 

3 – ROBERT EGGERS – THE WITCH (2015)

 

All of Robert Eggers’ films have had a folk horror vibe so far – but none more so than The Witch, with the most supernatural element. Overlaps with Christian religious horror in Puritan America.

 

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4 – THE RITUAL (2017)

 

Folk horror in Sweden – definitely with a supernatural element. Ninth place in my Top 10 Horror Films, riding on the back of its supernatural antagonist.

 

5 – GARETH EVANS – THE APOSTLE (2018)

 

A surprising change of direction (heh) to supernatural folk horror by Evans after the martial arts action of The Raid. I’d have ranked it higher if it had included the signature Raid cast.

 

6 – MIDSOMMAR (2019)

 

Brightly lit Swedish folk horror – replaying many of the same beats of The Wicker Man, similarly with no supernatural element.

 

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7 – DEAD AND BURIED (1981)

 

I featured it in both my Top 10 Horror Films and Top 10 Zombie Horror Films. Perhaps somewhat light on the folk part of its American setting (which is borrowed from folk religion elsewhere) but this film definitely has a folk horror vibe to it – and supernatural to boot.

 

8 – CHILDREN OF THE CORN (1984)

 

Based on a Stephen King short story (and surprisingly a film franchise) but it’s also American folk horror – with a supernatural element.

 

9 – LAIR OF THE WHITE WORM (1988)

 

Featured in my Top 10 Vampire Horror Films, it’s also folk horror with its surviving pagan Roman cult and snake god (with a thing for Christian virgins and characteristic psychedelic imagery by director Ken Russell)

 

10 – THE SERPENT AND THE RAINBOW (1988)

 

Featured in my Top 10 Zombie Horror Films – it’s also Haitian folk horror

 

SPECIAL MENTION

 

1 – EVIL DEAD

 

My top horror film – also my top zombie horror film, stretching the definition of zombie. It’s not folk horror as such but could easily be tweaked to be, particularly as a cult to the Necronomicon – and occasionally folk horror elements pop up in the franchise

 

2 – FROM DUSK TILL DAWN

 

Featured in my Top 10 Vampire Horror Films, it’s not folk horror but has some elements suggestive of it, especially in that closing shot panning out from the Aztec pyramid at the back of the strip club – and in elements of the TV series.

 

3 – BEN WHEATLEY

 

A director whose films have been a large part of the twenty-first century folk horror revival – I’d probably rank him in my top ten if I could find his films to stream and watch.

 

RATING: 5 STARS*****

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Top Tens – Mythology: Top 10 Mythologies (Special Mention: Divine Comedy Rankings)

An Italian joker card – public domain image Wikipedia “Joker (playing card)”

 

 

 

Life is the laughter of the gods – but sometimes they have a black sense of humor.

Ranking mythologies by their comedy and tricksters, from the laughter of the gods to serious business…

 

S-TIER (GOD-TIER – OR IS THAT JOKER-TIER?)

 

(1) CLASSICAL

 

As for the equal rites of its goddesses or female figures, classical mythology has to rank highly for the laughter of the gods – in the prolific number and enduring iconic nature of myths with comedic elements or trickster figures.

The Odyssey is arguably one long trickster’s tale. Indeed, the origin of dramatic comedy is in Greek theater or drama, which tended to revolve around the tales, themes or tropes of classical mythology.

 

(2) NORSE

 

For a mythology of icy warrior gods holding the line against chaos before being swallowed up by it (literally in the case of Odin), Norse mythology is surprisingly comedic when it comes to the laughter of the gods.

Part of that comes from the prevalence of tricksters, including the head of its pantheon Odin – who always reminds me of a compulsive gambler trying to string out one trick after another to stop the house from winning.

 

(3) CELTIC (ARTHURIAN)

 

Arthurian legend might seem very earnest, but it has quite the comedic streak to it. I mean, the Questing Beast is a gag, right?

Not to mention quite a few trickster figures – I’m counting Merlin.

 

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(4) EGYPTIAN

 

There would seem to be little room for the laughter of the gods in a mythology between the desert and the deep blue sea, but surprisingly Egyptian mythology does come to the party with some divine comedy, albeit some of it seemingly unintentional and more comedic to modern readers – as well as working blue.

There’s the creation myth, admittedly one of many, of the supreme god, again one of many, literally mast*rbating the cosmos into existence – or of the sacred scarab or dung beetle rolling the sun like dung. And the less said about Horus’s special sauce in his salad dressing the better, although I presume that must have been intended as a dirty joke.

 

(5) HINDU

 

A mythology that proposes reality as maya or illusion, and as lila or divine play, is clearly one for laughter of the gods, divine comedy and tricksters.

 

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(6) NATIVE AMERICAN (LAKOTA)

 

More broadly, Native American mythologies have quite the divine comedy of recurring trickster figures – foremost among them the animal trickster gods Coyote and Raven. I like to draw a direct line of mythic descent from the former to Wile E Coyote as modern trickster.

 

(7) AFRO-AMERICAN (VOODOO)

 

The loa seem to enjoy humor, often of a crude nature.

 

(8) MIDDLE EASTERN (BABYLO-SUMERIAN)

 

There’s some laughter of the gods here and there. Gilgamesh has a few gags.

 

(9) MESO-AMERICAN (AZTEC)

 

A priest sacrificing you and dancing around in your flayed skin isn’t that funny.

Okay, it’s a little funny but perhaps more as horror comedy along the lines of the Evil Dead franchise – or splatterpunk.

 

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(10) BIBLICAL

 

The Bible seems to be very serious business.

Or is it?

You’d be surprised by the Bible when it comes how much divine comedy or how many trickster figures you can squeeze out of it. Some of that is seemingly intentional but even more is unintentional – typically absurdist or black comedy.

What is neither black nor unintentional is the argument that the Gospels are ultimately comedic in nature, essentially along the lines of its eucatastrophe or happy ending in triumph over tragedy.

Taking that a bit further to less serious interpretations, I’ve always been struck by the similarity in style between parables and jokes. And you can’t deny that Jesus had a gift for a snappy one-liner, particularly to hecklers – even when those hecklers include the Devil.

Top Tens – Film: Top 10 Vampire Horror Films

 

Screenshot of Christopher Lee as Dracula in the 1958 film (public domain image from Internet Archive)

 

If zombies are the flesh of horror films, vampires are the blood – and these are my Top 10 Vampire Horror Films in one of my shallow dips or top tens on the spot.

 

S-TIER (GOD TIER – OR IS THAT DRACULA-TIER?)

 

1 – LET ME IN (2010)

 

epiction of vampires as alien predatory entities to humanity to invoke horror on the screen for me – the shark-like predators of 30 Days of Night, or the Lovecraftian parasites in the TV series The Strain.

A refreshingly revamped horror film – revamped also from its origin in the Swedish novel and film Let The Right One In. For one thing, there is just something inherently unsettling about child vampires – in this case, the vampire girl played by Chloe Grace Moritz. For another, the horror was not so much from any scares in it, but again more conceptual or existential – particularly in the relationship between the vampire girl and an alienated and bullied boy.

 

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2 – FRIGHT NIGHT (1985-2013)

 

Probably my favorite vampire film to watch – classic pulp fun! What do you do when a vampire becomes your next door neighbor? Call on the celebrity film vampire hunter turned late night horror TV host, of course.

Also a media franchise with a sequel and remake (and remake sequel).

 

3 – FROM DUSK TILL DAWN (1996-2016)

 

A vampire horror film by Robert Rodriguez (and Tarantino) so iconic that it has spawned a whole franchise extending over two decades – mostly lacklustre film sequels but I liked the TV series adaptation.

Gangster criminals on the run in Mexico vs stripper vampires? What more could you want? Well, apart from Salma Hayek’s Santanico Pandemonium, whose snake dance will be hot-branded in my psyche forever.

 

4 – 30 DAYS OF NIGHT (2007-2010)

 

Technically this should be in my comic book films as it is based on a comic series of the same name but it’s one of my favorite vampire horror films to watch so I’m ranking it here instead.

The title says the plot and premise – vampire congregate on the Alaskan town of Barrow for an all you can eat buffet opportunity of the titular thirty days of night in the depths of winter.

Also spawned a media franchise.

 

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5 – THE KEEP (1983)

 

Vampires and Nazis – what more do you want? How about Gandalf vs Dracula? (Well, before Gandalf facing off with Dracula actor Christopher Lee as Saruman in the Jackson Lord of the Ring films).

Okay – technically it’s not a vampire (or Dracula) but something posing as one, adapted from the novel by F. Scott Wilson. Still, I’m counting it as another of the more ‘artsy’ vampire horror films out there, albeit somewhat lacking in coherence for anything but cult following. Some big names among its actors – including Ian McKellan obviously for my Gandalf vs Dracula joke.

 

6 – LAIR OF THE WHITE WORM (1988)

 

Stoker strikes again! A film adapted from his 1911 novel – I suspect very loosely, borrowing from his more famous novel to feature snake-vampires in a pagan cult to a snake-god. Snakes for the snake-god! Slither in!

Directed by Ken Russell in his characteristic controversial flamboyant or psychedelic style – not to mention kinky, hence coiling itself deep in my psyche.

 

7 – SHADOW OF THE VAMPIRE (2000)

 

Nosferatu got a lot more real than you’d think. Willem Dafoe shines as usual, as does John Malkovich.

 

8 – BLOOD RED SKY (2021)

 

Putting the red into red-eye flight when hijackers take a plane with a surprise among the passengers.

 

9 – ABIGAIL (2024)

 

Apparently loosely based – very loosely based – on the 1936 film Dracula’s Daughter.

Part of the fun was the ensemble cast. Giancarlo Esposito, who seems to be the go-to guy to add smooth badass vocal charm to film or animated series. Dan Stevens – who is always fun in horror film roles and should be in more of them. Melissa Barrera further establishing herself as horror film scream queen (although she’ll never eclipse the high queen Jenna Ortega).

 

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10 – SINNERS (2025)

 

A vampire horror film that essentially pulls a From Dusk till Dawn switcheroo halfway through the film, but in a 1930s Mississippi blues speakeasy rather than a 1990s Mexico strip club. Quite frankly, the vampires seem to be doing almost everyone involved in the former a favor, given life in this Mississippi Delta sharecropping town – and given that the speakeasy, run by the Smokestack gangster duo, was doomed in three different ways before the vampires showed up. The vampires just got there first – and not by much.

The film has its highlights, foremost among them its Irish vampire antagonist Remmick but also its music, which essentially becomes its own character in the film.

 

 

SPECIAL MENTION

 

(1) DRACULA (CARMILLA & ELIZABETH BATHORY) – BRAM STOKER’S DRACULA (1992)

 

Special mention has to go to Dracula films within vampire films – and Bram Stoker’s Dracula is still my favorite cinematic adaptation of Dracula, albeit playing somewhat loose with the novel at times.

Apocalypse Now in Transylvania!

(Amusingly, Kim Newman did a short story doing just that inspired by the film).

Yes – that’s a quip based on the same director, Francis Ford Coppola, but captures the same cinematic visual style he brought to both. Also – it wouldn’t take too much to rewrite it as Apocalypse Now, except going upriver in Transylvania to take out Dracula.

Shout-out to films of literary vampire Carmilla and historical ‘vampire’ Elizabeth Bathory – not as prolific as Dracula but still worthy of their own special category within vampire films.

 

(2) NOSFERATU (2024)

 

“He is coming”

Yes, I know it’s Dracula with the serial numbers filed off but it’s essentially become a franchise all of its own, of remakes as well as a recurring model with Count Orlok (and the name nosferatu) for vampires. Although the original film was the 1922 German silent film – also remade by Werner Herzog as the 1979 German film Nosferatu the Vampire which is the ‘original’ version I saw – I’m giving this entry to the passion project remake by Robert Eggers as the outstanding version.

As played by Bill Skarsgard (upping the ante on his previous eldritch horror depiction of Pennywise), Orlok is still grotesque but also a towering and terrifying figure of apocalyptic plague, literal and metaphorical. And that’s not just by sight but also by sound – with his reverberating, sepulchral voice.

As usual, Eggers excels in the atmospheric and visual nature of his films – with the use of darkness so palpable here that it is virtually a character in its own right (and indeed usually is as part of Orlok). Much of the film has a dream-like quality, or rather a quality of nightmare – not coincidentally as Orlok has the power to invade the dreams or minds of his victims, being as much like a lich as he is a vampire.

The only drawback is the naked virgin on horseback – I would have liked to see much more of her, or even a whole film about her as naked virgin vampire hunter. Apparently she was played by a Czech model Katerina Bila – you’re welcome.

 

(3) SALEM’S LOT

 

A media franchise based on Stephen King’s version of Dracula in Maine.

 

 

HONORABLE MENTION

 

(1983) THE HUNGER

 

One of the more ‘artsy’ vampire horror films out there – with a cast of beautiful people (Catherine Deneuve, David Bowie and Susan Sarandon). Based (loosely) on a novel by Whitley Streiber, it features a love triangle between a doctor specialising in ageing research and a vampire couple.

 

(1987) THE LOST BOYS

 

Classic 80s vampire film, albeit trying a little too much too be cool for my taste and not as fun as Fright Night, that other classic 1980s vampire film.