Banded pit viper in Thailand, photograph by Rushenb and used as feature image for Wikipedia “Snake” as well as a featured picture on Wikimedia Commons (nominated as one of its finest pictures) under licence https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/2.0/deed.en

(3) BIBLICAL – VILLAIN: SERPENT

“Now the serpent was more cunning than any beast of the field the Lord God had made.”

That’s right – it’s all Biblical mythology from here on for my top three villains, because the Bible is unmatched when it comes to mythic villains. Indeed, I could have easily filled out this top ten entirely with Biblical villains (and can easily compile a Top 10 Biblical Villains – with many special mentions left over).

But you simply couldn’t feature villains of Biblical mythology without that original sinner, the Serpent in the Garden of Eden, at or close to the top.

This might seem somewhat surprising at first. The Serpent is not of monstrous size, operates on a similarly small scale (duping two people in a Garden), and has a walk-on one-hit-wonder bit part right at the start of the Bible. However it’s a bit part that has a big impact, changing everything and without which there’d be no story for the rest of the Bible.

That bit part was the successful temptation of Adam and Eve, the first man and woman, to disobey God and eat the forbidden fruit – the fruit of the Tree of Knowledge of Good and Evil, as inexplicably in the Garden of Eden as the Serpent itself. That saw God forever evict Adam and Eve from the Garden – paradise lost, lest Adam and Eve then eat the even more forbidden fruit of the Tree of Life.

In Genesis, “the serpent is portrayed as a deceptive creature or trickster, who promotes as good what God had forbidden and shows particular cunning in its deception.”

Of course, the Serpent’s deception is even more compelling because, almost uniquely among animals in the Bible, it has the ability to reason and to speak. In short, it could talk, begging the question of why no snake has spoken ever since, because while God cursed the serpent after its successful temptation of humanity, He did not curse it with losing its ability to speak,

Speaking of God’s curse on the Serpent, there’s something even more eldritch about the Serpent that’s easily overlooked which is implicit in the very bible narrative itself – it had legs! Or as I like to imagine it…wings? God curses it to crawl on its belly as punishment for its crime. If I came across a walking talking snake, I’d listen to whatever it said too – and quite frankly, the whole Garden of Eden set up smacks of a classic two-man con played by God and the serpent.

The ability of the Serpent to reason and to speak, so close to our own, suggests that the Serpent in Eden may be symbolic for an aspect of ourselves or our nature. Or perhaps an adversarial aspect of God – or, as became the common Christian interpretation, the Adversary himself.

Anyway, serpents are a recurring feature in the Bible – after all, “in the history of religions, the snake is the “sinister, strange animal par excellence” – but I like to imagine that all serpents in the Bible are aspects of the Serpent.

Or similarly to the Midgard Serpent in Norse mythology, that it may have started as a small snake but it grew to truly monstrous size as the Dragon that faces off against the Woman Clothed in the Sun in the Book of Apocalypse. It doesn’t matter that the Dragon is set in the War in Heaven prior to the Garden of Eden – as an eternal being, it is outside the linear flow of time.

ELDRITCH ABOMINATION RANKING

It’s a walking, talking snake. So yeah.

FANTASY DARK LORD RANKING

As the cunning and persuasive being it is, it ranks quite highly as a potential fantasy dark lord – although its lack of force as opposed to temptation suggests it is better suited to play the part of the Mouth of Sauron rather than Sauron.

RATING: 5 STARS*****

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Achilles in his standard design character profile art for the Smite video game

(3) CLASSICAL – HERO: ACHILLES

“Sing, Muse, of the wrath of Achilles”.

“Iron-hearted man-slaying Achilles

Who would not live long” –

The Shield of Achilles, W.H. Auden

It’s all classical mythology from here on in for my top three heroes. The villains of classical mythology may have been outranked by those of (two) other pantheons, but no one did heroes like classical mythology.

This is not surprising given that, as I noted in my introduction, the very word hero comes from Greek – as indeed many of our concepts or narratives of heroism originate from those of classical mythology, albeit somewhat at odds with the competing heroic narratives of moral idealism in Biblical mythology or Judeo-Christianity”.

A classical hero was a ‘warrior who lives and dies in the pursuit of honor’ and asserts their greatness by ‘the brilliancy and efficiency with which they kill'”.

And no hero illustrates that better than Achilles, the greatest Greek warrior and central character of the Iliad – of whose wrath the Muse sings in its opening line.

When people think of the Iliad, they usually think of all the things that aren’t actually in it – the whole mythos of the Trojan War in what is usually referred to as the Trojan Cycle, where in actuality it is an incredibly brief snapshot of the Trojan War – a few weeks or so in the final year of a legendary ten year war.

However what is definitely in the Iliad is the wrath of Achilles and his unmatched skill as the greatest warrior in the Trojan War – unmatched by Greek or Trojan, reflected in his feat of slaying the greatest Trojan warrior Hector, or perhaps even by the gods in face-to-face combat of arms. After all, he was only taken down by an arrow in the heel by the Trojan prince Paris – and even then Paris had the divine aid of Apollo.

As usual in classical mythology, there are different and competing versions – in this case for the weakness of Achilles at his heel, which has since lent itself to the proverbial phrase Achilles’ heel for a particular weak spot or area of vulnerability.

The version that perhaps looms largest in popular culture or imagination is that his mother, the nereid or sea nymph Thetis, had dipped him in the underworld river Styx as an infant to make him invulnerable – except that she held him by one of his heels, so that it was left untouched by the water and hence remained invulnerable.

Of course, that version is difficult to reconcile with the need for the divine armor and shield made for him by Hephaestus, as he would hardly need it if he was invulnerable. So there’s the competing version is that the arrow found his heel as the part that his armour left vulnerable, not his mother sticking him in the Styx.

None of this is in the Iliad, which is concerned more with the wrath of Achilles than his death – and it opens with the greatest Greek warrior Achilles sulking in his tent, because the Greek leader Agamemnon deprived him of the booty, in both senses of the word, of a Trojan girl taken captive. Until of course Achilles’ companion Patroclus is killed by the greatest Trojan warrior Hector – at which time, it’s personal, in turn until Achilles kills Hector and the Trojan king Priam begs Achilles if the latter could please stop dragging Hector’s dead body behind him while doing victory laps in his chariot.

The Greeks revered Achilles, with his tomb as focus of their reverence – venerated not only by Greeks but also “by Persian expeditionary forces, as well as by Alexander the Great and the Roman emperor Caracalla. Achilles’ cult was also to be found at other places…accounting for an almost Panhellenic cult to the hero”. I seem to recall one myth even pairing up Achilles with Helen in the afterlife, because it was only fitting that the greatest warrior should be with the most beautiful woman.

Others have taken a less favorable view of Achilles – “the Romans, who traditionally traced their lineage to Troy, took a highly negative view of Achilles”, essentially that of “man-slaying Achilles” – a savage and merciless butcher of men” or even “ruthlessly slaying women and children”. This carried over to medieval writers and others since, who have favored Hector as the true hero of the Iliad.

SUPERMAN-BATMAN SCALE

Achilles readily fits into the Superman end of the scale as divine or divinely powered superman, as opposed to the Batman of my next hero place entry.

PUNCHING OUT CTHULHU RANKING

Well, yes and no – or rather no and yes. Achilles doesn’t punch out any eldritch abominations rather than other warriors, but he totally could have.

PARTY ROCK RANKING

Well perhaps not when he’s sulking in his tent…

RATING: 5 STARS*****

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Fenrir or the Fenris Wolf in his standard design art in his Smite video game profile

(4) NORSE – VILLAIN: FENRIR / FENRIS WOLF

The other beast of Gotterdammerung in Norse mythology – the ultimate big bad wolf, outranking his father Loki as a figure of apocalyptic destruction.

And by big bad wolf, I mean the biggest and baddest – so big and bad that he was bound by the gods with magical bonds (made by the dwarves as everything magical in Norse mythology was) until the end of the world which cost the god of war Tyr a hand as he insisted upon Tyr to place it in his mouth as ransom in good faith for being bound.

So big that his two sons (Skoll and Hati) devour the Sun and Moon respectively – and he himself when he breaks his bonds to assault Asgard (with the Midgard Serpent) opens his mouth so wide that his upper jaw hits the sky.

And so bad that, well, his sons swallow the Sun and Moon, the breaking of his bonds ushers in Ragnarok, he assaults Asgard – and he swallows Odin whole, although he is then slain by Odin’s son.

He is also the ultimate big bad wolf as it is theorized that the other big bad wolves in Norse mythology – his sons that wolf down the Sun and Moon as well as the wolf Garm that slays the god of war Tyr – “were originally simply all Fenrir” or aspects of Fenrir.

Interestingly, Fenrir started as a good boy, a cute puppy raised by the gods until they bound him from fear of prophecy that he would kill Odin and unleash Ragnarok (or perhaps because he was just getting too big) – a self-fulfilling prophecy if ever there was one.

“John Lindow says that it is unclear why the gods decide to raise Fenrir as opposed to his siblings Hel and Jörmungandr…theorizing that it may be “because Odin had a connection with wolves? Because Loki was Odin’s blood brother?…He also points to Fenrir’s binding as part of a recurring theme of the bound monster, where an enemy of the gods is bound, but destined to break free at Ragnarok.”

Bound monster – or as per one of my favorite tropes on TV Tropes, sealed evil in a can.

ELDRITCH ABOMINATION RANKING

The abominable wolf – one of the most eldritch and abominable beasts in Norse mythology, arguably exceeded only by the Midgard Serpent. It’s not often you get an abomination in the shape of a dog.

FANTASY DARK LORD RANKING

Where the Midgard Serpent may outrank the Fenris Wolf, the Fenris Wolf outranks the Midgard Serpent for fantasy dark lord ranking – although it may be remembered for its bestial brutality, it had intelligence and even speech. And let’s not forget Sauron wolfed out as dark lord before The Lord of the Rings – literally assuming the guise of wolf or werewolf.

RATING:

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Odin in his standard design art for his character profile in the Smite video game

(4) NORSE – HERO: ODIN

If Thor is the Superman of Norse mythology, then Odin is Batman – the wily strategist of gambits and plans, indeed, a trickster more akin to Loki than Thor.

So yes – once again (for the third time) I’ve included two gods from a pantheon in my top ten heroes of mythology but just have a idiosyncratic preference for the more ambiguously heroic or even outright anti-heroic figure. In this case, a preference for Odin over Thor, as I did for Osiris over Horus for the Egyptian pantheon and Shiva over Vishnu for the Hindu pantheon.

To some extent, that was reflected by the Norse themselves. While Thor was the more conventional heroic figure and favored by the common Norse farmer, Odin “was preferred by the warrior aristocracy” who favored his “more chaotic and bloodthirsty ways”. Of course, that’s a matter of interpretation. To some, those chaotic and bloodthirsty ways were his “theme of self-sacrifice” and “ruthless actions…necessary for preventing Ragnarok”.

Odin was the god of wisdom as well as “war, death, frenzy (literal and figurative), magic, nobility, poetry, healing, the pursuit of knowledge and the runic alphabet itself”. Leader of the Norse gods known as Aesir, he had hundred of names and titles – with one of my favorites as “lord of frenzy” or “leader of the possessed”.

He was “famously one-eyed, as he sacrificed his other eye” for wisdom. When he wandered the earth (Midgard), he characteristically did so as bearded old man with wide-brimmed hat. “He is sometimes accompanied by animal familiars, such as the ravens Huginn and Muninn and the wolves Geri and Freki.”

“Odin is widely regarded as a god of the dead and warfare”, receiving slain warriors at Valhalla (“Carrion-hall” or “Hall of the Slain”) in the realm of Asgard aided by the Valkyries. “In the mythic future”, Odin leads the valiant slain warriors at Ragnarok. “In some later folklore, he is a leader of the Wild Hunt, a ghostly procession of the dead.”

And of course, Wednesday is named for him as Thursday is for Thor.

Like Thor, Odin has had an enduring influence in popular culture and imagination. Probably the best known thanks to the Marvel Cinematic Universe is his adaptation along with Thor and the rest of the Norse pantheon within the fictional universe of Marvel Comics. In The Lord of the Rings, Gandalf has been likened to Odin as wanderer – and although it’s by no means an exact correspondence, there is more than a little Odin about Gandalf.

SUPERMAN-BATMAN SCALE

As I said, if Thor is the Superman of Norse mythology then Odin is Batman.

PUNCHING OUT CTHULHU RANKING

Well not so much punching out eldritch abominations but planning to win or at least hold the line against them.

PARTY ROCK RANKING

Odin scores high on my party rock ranking – Valhalla was a party every night!

RATING:

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The Midgard Serpent in its standard art design from its Smite video game character profile

(5) NORSE MYTHOLOGY – VILLAIN: JORMUNGANDR / MIDGARD SERPENT

The beast of the twilight of the gods – Gotterdammerung or Ragnarok – in Norse mythology.

Indeed, along with my next entry, one of two such beasts that outrank Loki as figures of apocalyptic destruction, despite being his children.

And by beast, I mean “an unfathomably large and monstrous sea serpent or worm who dwells in the world sea, encircling the Earth (Midgard)” – literally encircling that is, an ouroboros biting its own tail as it coiled around the world. Hence it was also known as the Midgard or World Serpent, “the sea monster to end all sea monsters” – “there isn’t an ocean in Midgard that doesn’t have part of him in it”.

Admittedly it didn’t too much than slumber at the bottom of the sea biting its tail, but that’s just because it was waiting for Gotterdammerung. Once it stopped biting its tail, you knew things were going down and the end of the world was literally nigh, led by the Serpent itself emerging from the ocean to assault Asgard. Even then, it’s so colossal that “only a third of his body is able to emerge from the ocean”.

It amuses me that the gods threw him in the world sea when he was just a small serpent to drown him, only for him to grow into the world-encircling entity he became. Even while essentially dormant at the bottom of the sea, he had a long running feud going on with Thor – with each regarded as the other’s nemesis, as they ultimately proved to be at Ragnarok, with Thor smiting the Serpent but succumbing to the Serpent’s venom afterwards. Before that, Thor had a few run-ins with him even while he was at the bottom of the sea – run-ins so terrifying that Thor’s companions cut the Serpent loose to force Thor to abandon the fight.

ELDRITCH ABOMINATION RANKING

One of the most eldritch and abominable, arguably the archetypal abomination – and on the largest scale, in Norse or any other mythology. Indeed, it is uncannily similar to fantasy’s benchmark eldritch abomination, Cthulhu – with both essentially dormant slumbering under the sea, until waking up and destroying the world

FANTASY DARK LORD RANKING

Yeah, not the brightest abomination, essentially just sleeping under the sea with a button marked “Push here for Ragnarok”. Indeed, one of the most mindless of mythology’s villains which costs it major points in my fantasy dark lord ranking – the other villainous entries from Norse mythology in my top ten run rings around it as potentially fantasy dark lord.

RATING:

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Thor as depicted in his standard art design in his Smite video game character profile

(5) NORSE – HERO: THOR

Hammer time! The people’s champion! Thor the Thunderer – god of “thunder, storms, strength, protection, fertility, farmers and free people”. Thursday is named for him.

One of two deities from Norse mythology I rank as heroes in my top ten, Thor is the more conventionally heroic figure and was “the favorite god of the average Norse farmer”.

“Thor’s exploits, including his relentless slaughter of his foes” – giants and other primal “demonic threats to the gods and mankind” – and his “fierce battles with the monstrous serpent Jormungandr”, including “their foretold mutual deaths” in Ragnarok. Spoiler alert – Thor smites the serpent with his hammer but is then overcome by its venom (within nine steps).

What else is there to say? It was relatively straightforward for Marvel Comics to adapt Thor as a superhero in comics more or less the same as he is in Norse mythology. That led to his adaptation in film by the Marvel Cinematic Universe and his portrayal by Chris Hemsworth lent itself to Thor looming largest of all my top ten mythic heroes in popular imagination.

SUPERMAN-BATMAN SCALE

Definitely towards the divine superman end of the scale, except whereas Superman in comics is essentially superpowered by the sun, Thor is Superman of the storm.

However, he does have a certain Batman quality, relying on gadgets such as his hammer, belt, and gloves.

PUNCHING OUT CTHULHU RANKING

It’s what he does – routinely punching out giants and the other eldritch abominations of Norse mythology.

PARTY ROCK RANKING

Yes – Thor would thunder at parties and not just as depicted by Chris Hemsworth. He literally drains the sea as his keg in one of his stories.

RATING:

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*

Loki as he appears in his standard character design from his official profile in the Smite video game

(6) NORSE – VILLAIN: LOKI

The supreme shapeshifting trickster deity of Norse mythology, whose shtick seemed to be screwing things up for the Hel of it before just wanting to watch the world freeze in Fimbulwinter for s€x, drugs and Ragnarok-and-roll.

Indeed, one might be surprised that I rank him only in sixth place – lower than two other figures of Norse mythology and children of Loki at that – given his ultimate apocalyptic role, arguably the equivalent of my top entry for Norse mythology.

However, that last feature is often seen as “adaptational villainy” under the influence of Christianity rather than reflecting his original role, which was more mischievous than destructive. This is also reflected in Loki happily knocking about with the gods (and being adopted by them), frequently paired up with Thor himself as trusted companion. And on the whole Loki lived up to the trust of Thor and the gods. Yes – he got them into sticky situations, but you really get the impression that he did so as a challenge to himself to see if he could get everyone out of the mischief he caused, as indeed he almost always did.

Ultimately however, at least in the popular version of Norse mythology we have inherited, he crossed the line into outright villainy with his role in the death of Baldur (as well as thwarting Baldur’s return from the underworld) and it was all downhill from there.

Also, I think it’s a fair call for his offspring to outrank him as they were monstrous and primal forces of destruction throughout, albeit he ultimately joined with them in the destruction of the world. They also take down the big two of Norse mythology, whereas Loki settles for settling scores with his longstanding enemy Heimdall in mutually assured destruction. It’s interesting that while Loki himself was not monstrous – at least in his fair appearance – he consistently sired monstrous offspring. I do feel sorry for his wife Sigyn, who remained the model of devotion to him despite everything he did.

ELDRITCH ABOMINATION RANKING

Not so much for Loki himself, although it is hard to fell with a shapeshifter, but certainly for everything he sired. I mean, whenever Loki got it on, it seemed to result in the birth of some monstrous abomination and usually a world-ending one at that.

FANTASY DARK LORD RANKING

Loki ranks high as a fantasy dark lord given his intelligence and abilities, arguably becoming an apocalyptic dark lord in Ragnarok albeit as one of what seems to be a committee of dark lords (and ladies), but loses points for his lack of focus because his true love seems to be trolling.

RATING:

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King Arthur as he appears in his official character profile art from the Smite video game

(6) CELTIC MYTHOLOGY (ARTHURIAN LEGEND) – HERO: KING ARTHUR

Arthur Pendragon, the once and future king of Britain.

It always intrigues me that a figure that, if not actually a historical warlord of sub-Roman Britain is at least portrayed as one, should have such enduring resonance in popular culture and imagination beyond his time and place of origin. And not just in his native Britain onwards or even beyond to the wider ‘Anglosphere’ of British settlement and cultural influence but also in Europe and Western culture in general.

For mine is the grail quest –

round table & siege perilous

fisher king & waste land

bleeding lance & dolorous stroke

adventurous bed & questing beast

Part of that derives from the compelling elements and personae of Arthurian legend beyond Arthur himself. His father Uther. The wizard Merlin. The Lady in the Lake. The sword in the stone or Excalibur (which are not the same but are often conflated in adaptations, notably the film Excalibur).

His queen Guinevere. The enchantress Morgan Le Fay (often conflated with another character, Morgause, as the mother of usurper Mordred). The knights of the Round Table – most famously Lancelot but also Gawain, Galahad, Perceval and Bedivere. The Holy Grail. Avalon – and so on.

And yet always and everywhere the beating heart of Arthurian legend remains Arthur himself, befitting his title as once and future king, itself from the motif of his messianic return. He is consistently portrayed in heroic terms, as the best we can be in ability and character.

It might seems anomalous that I rank Arthur over gods or cosmic figures from Egyptian or Hindu mythology – Osiris and Horus, Shiva and Vishnu. In part, that’s because of preference from my Eurocentric and Anglocentric perspective. However, it also reflects that those gods or cosmic figures seem remote or even alien, with an alien morality to match. That is not the case for the all too human Arthur, whose character and morality are much more relatable to us – and indeed has served as the archetype of the ideal king or ruler, both in history and the genre of fantasy.

SUPERMAN-BATMAN SCALE

Finally a hero more on the Batman side of the scale – not a divine superman (although there are elements of that) but the peak of human perfection.

PUNCHING OUT CTHULHU RANKING

I am more familiar with King Arthur punching out human opponents but I seem to recall variants of Arthurian legend or at least adaptations from it when he punches out more supernatural opponents.

PARTY ROCK RANKING

We tend to think of Arthur as a paragon of honour, humility and virtue but I’m prepared to bet he could party hard at the Round Table or Camelot.

RATING:

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