Top Tens – Film: Top 10 Films (Revamped) (7) Zulu

 

Scene from the Zulu film, with Michael Caine front and center – so much so that I tend to think of his historical character, Lieutenant Bromhead, simply as Michael Caine

 

(7) ZULU (1964)

 

The Battle of Rorke’s Drift.

That’s it – that’s the entry. Well that and the 1964 film Zulu which depicted it.

If you’re a fan of the Battle of Helm’s Deep in The Lord of The Rings film (The Two Towers), then you’re a fan of the Battle of Rorke’s Drift as depicted in this film, as the former was filmed in a manner deliberately reminiscent of the film Zulu according to Jackson.

If anything, Rorke’s Drift in Zulu was even more epic than Helm’s Deep – as a small company of less than 150 soldiers attached to the Royal Engineers (including a substantial number of sick and wounded) fought off a force of about 3-4,000 Zulus.

The battle was a small albeit highly celebrated part of the Anglo-Zulu War, with the British soldiers finding themselves in the path of a Zulu force in the aftermath of the opening Zulu victory at Isandlwana.

When it comes to Rorke’s Drift, I tend to default to its depiction in the film Zulu, as it is deeply embedded in my psyche. While generally accurate to the historical battle, it does of course have inaccuracies (with perhaps the most egregious involving the depiction of Private Hook, a model soldier, as a rogue redeemed in the battle). The film may also be seen as somewhat problematic in these times given its celebration of British imperial victory – I don’t care.

Indeed the film tends to glamorize both sides in the battle – with the Zulus depicted as a brave, intelligent, capable, resourceful and ultimately honorable adversary. And if anyone can resist the stirring orchestral theme by John Barry, I don’t know what to say.

The British soldiers were led by Lieutenant Chard, portrayed by Stanley Baker, and his second in command Lieutenant Bromhead, portrayed by a young Michael Caine in his breakthrough film role. Deciding that retreat isn’t an option as they will move too slowly with their sick or wounded and the Zulus will catch them out in the open, they have no option but to stand and fight behind improvised barricade defenses.

Throughout the day and night (into the following day) after the Zulu force surrounds them, wave after wave of Zulu attackers are narrowly repelled by the desperate British defenders. At one point, the Zulus succeed in setting fire to the field hospital, leading to tense scenes of the evacuation of patients under fierce attack by Zulu warriors – and British Surgeon-Major James Henry Reynolds calmly continues his surgery on a wounded soldier with fighting all around him. And yes – he got a Victoria Cross.

The British defenders retreat to the shortened lines of their inner barricades. One tactic you see through the film is the use of multiple ranks of soldiers to maintain a nearly continuous volley of fire with their bolt-action rifles. None more so than the climactic scene with three such ranks used (after falling back from desperate hand-to-hand combat at an outer barricade) to defend a massive assault by Zulu warriors. And as the camera pans back, you see the fallen Zulu warriors mere inches away from the front rank of breathless British soldiers – an impressive feat of holding the line.

That’s when you start to think from the preceding sense of overwhelming doom that hangs over the British soldiers – holy crap, they’re actually going to make it! And then – no, holy crap, they’re not…as the Zulu force masses on the hill overlooking Rorke’s Drift, seemingly barely diminished, while the British are exhausted and running low on ammunition. Lieutenant van den Burgh, their Afrikaaner advisor serving with the Natal Native Contingent, sinks to his knees and rebukes the British officers (and arguably their imperialism as well) – “Haven’t you had enough? We’re all dead!”

And then, holy crap again – as the Zulus chant, raising their spears. “They’re taunting us!” Michael Caine’s character exclaims. Van den Burgh laughs – “You couldn’t be more wrong – they’re saluting us as fellow braves!”. And then the Zulus slowly turn and walk away, still chanting, until a lone warrior is left, before he too turns and leaves.

Sadly, the historical battle ended in a more prosaic way, without the Zulus saluting the British but more withdrawing from strategic sense and an advancing British relief column. I prefer to think it ended the way it did in the film.

11 Victoria Crosses were awarded to the defenders of Rorke’s Drift, as the film itself narrates with a full roll call just before the end credits – including the surgeon as mentioned but also Hook and the two commanding lieutenants Chard and Bromhead.

 

FANTASY & COMEDY

 

I’ll deal with both at once, since the film has little fantasy or comedy as pure his

 

RATING:
A-TIER (TOP TIER)

Top Tens – Fantasy & SF: Top 10 SF Books (Special Mention) (3) Paranoia

Rulebook cover art

 

 

(3) PARANOIA (1984 – PRESENT)

 

Commie mutant traitor!

“The Computer is your friend. The Computer wants you to be happy. Happiness is mandatory. Failure to be happy is treason. Treason is punishable by summary execution. Are you happy, citizen? Have a nice daycycle”

Welcome to Alpha Complex in the SF role-playing game of Paranoia – “a world designed by Kafka, Stalin, Orwell, Huxley, Sartre, the Marx Brothers and that crazy old man at the airport bar at 2 am”. A dystopian fusion to the point where everything would be monstrously overwhelming but for its own dysfunctionality and the game’s absurdist dark humor.

It’s also a post-apocalyptic dystopia – although what apocalypse (if any?) forced the last survivors (or are they?) of humanity into the last underground or domed city (or is it?) run by the supercomputer known simply as the Computer or Friend Computer is now mysterious, as no one is sure what happened any more, if anyone ever did. Not even the Computer, when it tried to figure out what went wrong – “unfortunately, the Computer’s databases had been corrupted, and after finding some old Cold War propaganda, it concluded that the Communists did it”.

And now, the Computer is the equivalent of a barely functional paranoid schizophrenic – that probably would have wiped out Alpha Complex but for its inefficiency, its ability to simultaneously pursue wildly inconsistent goals at odds with each other, and its genuine but abstract benevolence towards Alpha Complex (or whatever remains of either that benevolence or Alpha Complex).

It may be teetering on complete breakdown (or outright psychosis) after decades of subversion or reprogramming by conflicting groups, but the Computer still rules Alpha Complex – “its dystopian society organized in a hierarchy of “security clearances based on the electromagnetic spectrum (specifically Isaac Newton’s version), from lowly Infrared worker drones, through Red grunts and Yellow managers, all the way up the rainbow to the Violet and Ultraviolet elite”, the High Programmers.

This society is supported by “swarms of robots” – which if anything, tend to be crazier and more dangerous to humans than the Computer – as well as “spies, omnipresent surveillance, and a bureaucracy so huge and convoluted no one’s quite sure who’s in charge of what any more”.

“Problems in Alpha Complex are solved by teams of Troubleshooters, whose job is to find trouble and shoot it”. (Stay alert. Trust nobody! Keep your laser handy!).

Those problems including traitors – where virtually everything is treason, and even the knowledge of what is or isn’t treason is usually above your security clearance – as well as Communists or other secret societies, and mutants. Or a combination of all of these – the trifecta of “commie mutant traitor”, which is what players yell as they shoot each other in the back. Indeed, I’m known to be fond of using that phrase in real life.

Of course, “thanks to years of clone breeding” (everyone is a clone in Alpha Complex), “overexposure to radiation, and other snafus”, everyone is a mutant. Everyone is also a member of one or more secret societies, mostly plotting to overthrow the order of Alpha Complex. Ironically, the secret societies were started by the Computer, as an outlet to the natural human impulse to conspire together, but as usual in Alpha Complex, got out of control.

(You seem a little too informed of matters above your security clearance, citizen – please report for termination! Have a nice daycycle!)

The players “are (usually) Red-level Troubleshooters working for Friend Computer, grudgingly assigned useless, backfiring equipment and weapons, and dispatched on (often impossible) Suicide Missions, all while navigating the endless deathtrap which is Alpha Complex, keeping their mutant powers a secret, advancing the cause of their secret society, and trying to earn promotion to higher color grades”. Not to mention in-fighting among players – if you’re not shooting each other in the back, it’s because you’re shooting each other in the face.

You’ll go through a few clones, if not all of them, by the end, if you make it to the end – which is the truly dangerous part, the mission de-briefing, when you accuse each of treason. If you’re lucky, your fabricated accusations of treason might just overlap with their genuine treason.

 

RATING: 5 STARS*****
S-TIER (GOD-TIER)

Top Tens – Film: Top 10 Films (Revamped) (9) The Raid

 

From the films’ theatrical release poster

 

 

(9) GARETH EVANS –

THE RAID (2011-2014)

 

100 minutes of awesomeness in a frenetic, claustrophobic martial arts action masterpiece – the martial arts being the Indonesian pencak silat that is showcased by the film’s fight choreography and the claustrophobic being the film’s premise.

That premise being an Indonesian police squad deployed to raid a drug lord’s apartment block in the sums of Jakarta – actually a fortress-like safe house for the city’s worst criminals – only to find themselves forced to fight their way through the complex to carry out their mission or just to survive long enough to escape.

“Good morning, everyone. You may have noticed we have some guests trawling the halls today. Now, I certainly did not invite them and they most certainly are not welcome. So, in the interests of public health, should you rid this building of its recent infestation, well, then, you can consider yourself a permanent resident of this building. Free of charge. You’ll find these f*cking cockroaches on the sixth floor. Now, go to work. And please, please enjoy yourself.”

And yes – it was the same premise that was (independently) used to similarly great effect in the 2012 Dredd film.

And ever since, I’ve enjoyed whenever The Raid pops up in one form or another – most obviously in its 2014 sequel, which maintained the frenetic action of the first. You know you’re in for glorious action when the climax of the film is preceded by a character telling its action hero that the only way to solve his problems is to kill all of the parties responsible. My personal highlight of the sequel was the assassin duo dubbed Hammer Girl and Baseball Bat Man.

I also get excited whenever I see what I call the Raid guys – primarily Iko Suwais and ‘Mad Dog’ Yahan Ruhian – in a film. Even when they were disappointingly wasted in The Force Awakens. Fortunately, John Wick Chapter 3 made up for that.

I’m also counting it as The Raid popping up for any film by the same director Gareth Evans.

 

FANTASY & SF

No, except to the extent that the intense fighting skill and survival of characters borders on supernatural.

 

COMEDY

Again, not really any comedic elements, except occasionally of the blacker kind

 

RATING: 4 STARS****

B-TIER (HIGH TIER)

Top Tens – Fantasy & SF: Top 10 SF Books (Special Mention) (2) Encyclopedia of SF

Cover of the 1993 print edition published by Palgrave Macmillan with the SFE logo in the circle – the edition I own (and yes – I own an elusive print edition)

 

 

(2) ENCYCLOPEDIA OF SCIENCE FICTION (1979 – PRESENT)

 

“That you could be reading it right now goes without saying, since in some alternate universe you surely are”.

Quite simply, my favorite reference work for the genre of science fiction in different media – books, comics, film & television, and so on (art and illustration, magazines, even music). The first print edition was edited by Peter Nicholls and John Clute in 1979 – with entries not only for works and creators, but also the greater (and lesser) themes and terminology of science fiction. Even better, it was published online in 2011 and is regularly updated since then (winning a Hugo Award in 2012), with editors expanded to include David Langford and Graham Sleight.

And like its companion Encyclopedia for Fantasy, its most engaging strength as a reference work is not so much its entries for individual authors or works, but its compilation of SF themes and terminology or tropes – although it doesn’t have the abundant classification of subgenres, nor quite the evocative phrases used as entry titles as the Encyclopedia of Fantasy. However, it does have a handy online index of themes, featuring such themes of interest as Dream Hacking or Medieval Futurism.

It even has an entry on itself. Kudos, SFE, kudos.

 

RATING: 5 STARS*****
S-TIER (GOD TIER)

Top Tens – Film: Top 10 Films (new entry) (10) Warfare

Film poster art

 

(10) WARFARE (2025)

 

Warfare is “a 2025 American action war drama thriller film” that earns my wildcard tenth place entry by my usual criteria as best film of the present or previous year. Also, it’s a nice bookend with my film in top spot – you’ll see why.

I like the films of Alex Garland, who wrote and directed the film with Ray Mendoza, based on Mendoza’s experiences during the Iraq War as a US Navy Seal. The backdrop is apparently the (Second) Battle of Ramadi or its aftermath in 2026. Mendoza’s platoon – shown with pseudonyms in the film – are on a surveillance mission, which involves them taking over a civilian house, much to the fear and distress of its occupants, and literally scoping out the local jihadi insurgents. Literally, that is, through their sniper sights.

And that’s where things go horribly wrong, as the insurgents scope them right back and get in first, just as American air support withdraws (except for a couple of shows of force that are indeed awesome). From there, it’s a tense story of survival, as the Americans focus purely on extraction – just getting the hell out of there, in one piece or as close as possible. Spoiler alert – it’s not possible, at least in one piece.

You, the viewer, are right there with them, immersed in a visceral experience of combat, and in real time to boot. Also the futility of it all, apart from the destruction of a random civilian house because it was in a good position for surveillance. As one of the female civilians repeatedly shouts after them – “Why?”. They don’t have a good answer for her.

 

RATING:

X-TIER (WILD TIER) – BEST OF 2025

Top Tens – Fantasy & SF: Top 10 SF Books (Special Mention) (1) Omni

One of Omni’s highlights was its top quality SF (and fantasy) art, showcased by this hardcover book collection of it published in 2014

 

 

(1) OMNI (1978-1998)

 

O Omni – the iconic magazine of science and science fiction!

Omni was founded by Kathy Keeton and her partner Bob Guccione, better known as the publisher of Penthouse magazine, in 1978. Unfortunately, it foundered with Keeton’s death in 1997 and wound up in 1998, having ceased print in 1995 but continued online for a short time.

I was introduced to Omni magazine when a spring-cleaning neighbor gave me their old collection of magazines, which also included an anthology Best of Omni Science Fiction. Omni was the gift that kept on giving, as it introduced me to a variety of SF writers, including many writers in my Top 10 SF list or special mentions.

In its halcyon days, it obviously paid writers well as it was a leading light of SF stories, including genre classics. Its impact wasn’t limited to stories – it also featured leading genre artists (including H.R. Giger) as well as feature articles on science and other recurring features. One of the latter was competitions for readers, with one such being for Partly Baked Ideas, the winning entry of which has lodged in my psyche ever since – the Partly Baked Idea for plant flight. Take certain plants that open and close their leaves with the alternation of day and night, combine them with gradually decreasing artificial light from the natural day cycle to strobe frequency, and you may just have plants that flap their leaves enough to fly…

Or not – they were Partly Baked Ideas after all!

 

RATING: 5 STARS*****
S-TIER (GOD TIER)

Top Tens – Top 10 Girls of Mythology

Cover art of issue 7 War Goddess published by Boundless Comics

 

 

GIRLS OF MYTHOLOGY: TOP 10

 

That’s right – I can find Fantasy Girls in anything.

Of course, this is something of a personal novelty top ten list, as my Girls of Mythology don’t tend to have the same art or cosplay as my usual Fantasy Girls in popular culture – the holy trinity of comics, video games and anime of course, but also animation or fantasy and SF.

Although you may be surprised – my Girls of Mythology probably have more name recognition or adaptations in popular culture than those from other areas of culture (which I’ll similarly feature in novelty top ten lists – such as my Girls of History or my Girls of Poetry and Literature). And perhaps even more surprisingly, since some of them do pop up in popular culture – even in comics or video games – they do feature in art and cosplay. Of course, it helps to have video games in which gods and goddesses are playable characters, such as the game Smite.

And they’re reasonably diverse – mostly goddesses of course, but a few mortal girls or at least semi-mortal. You know how mythology is – sometimes the lines of the divine feminine are blurry. Also, they come from a range of my favorite mythologies. My classical mythology girls get top billing of course (and potentially their own top ten) – after all, I’m in it for the nymphs. However, the top ten is reasonably spread throughout different mythologies – including a surprisingly high billing for Biblical mythology, which reflects a surprisingly high prevalence of high profile Biblical bad girls (who will also potentially get their own top ten).

Anyway, counting down my Top 10 Girls of Mythology.

 

Not quite Erzulie but close enough – cover art for the first issue of Vertigo’s Dominique Laveau: Voodoo Child

 

(10) AFRO-AMERICAN (VOODOO): ERZULIE FREDA DAHOMEY

 

Erzulie (or Ezili) Freda Dahomey is the voodoo love goddess, or more precisely, loa – and one of the few female figures in our top ten who is the subject of actual worship by substantial numbers of people today. Like many mythologies, voodoo gets a little messy with its pantheon- the Erzulie are apparently a family of loa associated with femininity and fluidity (or water), or perhaps different aspects of the same loa. Here we are concerned with Erzulie Freda, often titled more expansively as Maitres (also Metres or Mistress) Mambo Erzulie Freda Dahomey (or Daome) – goddess of love, but also beauty, dancing, flowers, jewelry, luck, luxury and more.

She is very much the flirtatious and sensuous party girl, so much so that she has three husbands and one ring for each of them, but can also be coquettish, vain or prone to jealousy and other flaws. In Catholic iconography – usually important in Haitian voodoo due to its history of camouflage for their deities – she is identified with the Mater Dolorossa, which reflects her characteristic depiction of never being able to attain her heart’s desire and prone to tears of longing or regret.

 

RATING:

A-TIER (TOP TIER)

*

Free sample ‘divine gallery’ art – Old World Gods

*

(9) NATIVE AMERICAN (LAKOTA): WHITE BUFFALO CALF WOMAN

 

White Buffalo Woman is the sacred or ‘wakan’ woman of the native American Lakota nation. She came to the Lakota in a time of famine, appearing as a beautiful young woman in white, teaching them their sacred rituals and promising to return. Hers will be an apocalyptic return or ghost dance, in which evil will be swept from the world, and all the buffalo, ancestors and lost tribes will return.

 

RATING:

A-TIER (TOP TIER)

*

 

Kali as she appears in her Golden skin character profile art in the Smite video game

 

(8) HINDU: KALI

 

Kali is the original bad girl goddess – and as a goddess of Hinduism, one with more actual live worshippers than any other female figure in my top ten.

In general, female figures in Hinduism are some of the few which appear attractive to modern eyes in their traditional artistic depictions, most notably their voluptuous temple sculpture (some of which would not look out of place in Playboy, or even an adult film in the more steamy temples). Indeed, there’s pinup style art by Elias Chatzoudis – inspired by Kali – would not be out of place there.

Good girl goddesses such as Lakshmi and Parvati might seem sweeter, but ultimately Kali is more iconic, although she is traditionally depicted as a fearsome or terrifying black or blue-skinned destructive figure (yet still often naked and voluptuous). Although Kali is sometimes identified as an aspect of Parvati as divine mother goddess – Hindu mythology can get convoluted in its polytheism. It’s complicated – and so is Kali.

Like Shiva – who tends to be identified as her consort – Kali is the destroyer (within the cycle of creation, preservation and destruction), but hers is a righteous destruction. Again like Shiva, she tends to destroy demonic or evil forces – “she destroys evil to protect the innocent” or as divine protector to bestow liberation. Even her image as destroyer can be seen as merely a form of a supreme goddess figure and mother of the universe (devi) or divine feminine force (shakti) – who is herself creator, preserver and destroyer

 

RATING:

A-TIER (TOP TIER)

*

Morgan Le Fay character profile from the Smite video game

*

(7) CELTIC (ARTHURIAN): MORGAN LE FAY

 

Morgan or Morgana Le Fay (there are other variants) is characteristically the bad girl of Arthurian legend – an enchantress who seduces Arthur’s knights away from Camelot (such that they are mostly dead or lost or compromised) and plots to overthrow the kingdom.

Or not. Her early appearances in Arthurian legend “do not elaborate her character beyond her role as a goddess, a fay (or fairy), a witch, or a sorceress, generally benevolent and related to King Arthur as his magical savior and protector”. Her prominence increased over time, as did her moral ambivalence or outright villainy, particularly in Malory’s Le Morte d’Arthur, which was in many ways the codification of Arthurian legend.

She is variously portrayed as Arthur’s sister (or more precisely half-sister), even conflating her with another traditional character (and her sister) Morgause as his lover and mother by him to Mordred, usurper and adversary to Arthur in his fatal last battle (as in the film Excalibur, which remains my favorite cinematic adaptation of Arthurian legend). Yet she moves in mysterious ways and is one of the retinue of maidens who take Arthur to Avalon after his final battle.

 

RATING:

A-TIER (TOP TIER)

*

 

Freya as she appears in her standard design in official character profile art in the Smite video game

 

 

(6) NORSE: FREYA

 

Freya (or Freyja or Freja) is the Nordic love goddess, blonde and blue-eyed, most beautiful of the goddesses and ogled lustfully by the giants – more than one Norse myth has a giant unsuccessfully claim Freya as their prize. She was also goddess of war and queen of the Valkyries, taking half of all heroes slain in battle into her heavenly field in Asgard (the other half going of course to Odin’s hall in Valhalla).

More broadly, she was the goddess of love, beauty, fertility, s€x, war, gold and magic – goddess of the golden necklace or torc Brisingamen, goddess of the falcon-feathered flying cloak and goddess of the cat-pulled chariot.

Above all, she was the lady of Friday, the day named for her. All hail Lady Friday, goddess of the weekend!

 

RATING:

A-TIER (TOP TIER)

*

Ishtar in her standard art design for her Smite video game character profile

*

(5) BABYLO-SUMERIAN: ISHTAR INANNA

 

Babylonian goddess Ishtar (Sumerian Inanna) is the sensual goddess of love and war, personification of the morning star, and mistress of the mysteries of death and rebirth. Her most famous myth is her descent into the underworld for her lover Tammuz (Sumerian Dumuzi), where she had to take off one of her seven veils at each of the seven gates of the underworld (the dance of the seven veils) so that she came naked to the heart of hell.

Ishtar was above all associated with s€xuality – the rites of the sacred marriage (hieros gamos) and her cult of temple pr0stitution. As such, she may have been the original model for the Biblical Wh0re of Babylon. Certainly, she and her sister goddesses repeatedly seduce the Israelites away from their Biblical faith – the prophet Ezekiel lamented her rituals of “the women weeping for Tammuz” at the very “door of the gate of the Lord’s house” in Jerusalem. Yet she has also been seen as the model for Esther, the beautiful and virtuous Biblical heroine of the Babylonian exile. Such are the mysterious ways of this good and bad girl goddess, who dances with stars and descends into the underworld.

Her counterpart in the pagan borderlands of Biblical Israel was Astarte or Asherah, who recurs through the Old Testament as a constant temptress of the Israelites – even worshipped as the pagan goddess of Israel, the consort of Yahweh and Queen of Heaven. Her sacred figures or asherim – poles, trees or groves – were found throughout Israel and her worship maddened the prophet Jeremiah as the people of Jerusalem gathered “to burn incense unto the queen of heaven, and to pour out drink offerings to her”. (Those Biblical prophets sure knew how to spoil a good party)

 

RATING:

A-TIER (TOP TIER)

 

Isis in her standard art design for her Smite video game character profile (under her more Egyptian name Eset)

 

(4) EGYPTIAN: ISIS

 

Outside of Hinduism, ancient Egyptian female figures are perhaps the other female figures that appear attractive to modern eyes in their traditional artistic depictions, particularly their monumental statues and paintings. Lithe and svelte in their tight, form-fitting dresses, with their golden skin and painted eyes, they would not look out of place as supermodels on a modern catwalk.

Isis is the most iconic and famous of Egyptian goddesses – throne goddess of the pharaoh, goddess of magic who seduced the secret name from the sun god Ra, lover of Osiris who resurrected him after he was dismembered by his evil adversary Set and mother of the divine hero Horus. She enchanted the Greek and Roman conquerors of Egypt, so much so that that she loomed as a goddess of the Roman Empire to rival even Christianity and it is tempting to think how the empire could have gone the way of the ankh and not the cross. In the words of her apostle, Lucius Apuleius:

“You see me here, Lucius, in answer to your prayer. I am nature, the universal Mother, mistress of all the elements, primordial child of time, sovereign of all things spiritual, queen of the dead, queen also of the immortals, the single manifestation of all gods and goddesses that are…Though I am worshipped in many aspects, known by countless names … the Egyptians who excel in ancient learning and worship call me by my true name…Queen Isis.”

 

RATING:

A-TIER (TOP TIER)

 

Cover art by J. Scott Campbell of Eve for the Hero Comics Hero Initiative Book published 1 April 2017 – both my favorite artistic representation of Eve depicting her temptation in all its naked snaky glory and one of my favorite J Scott Campbell artworks

 

 

(3) BIBLICAL: EVE

 

“When the apple reddens

Never pry

Lest we lose our Edens –

Eve and I”

 

Few mythic female figures are as iconic, as evocative as Eve – the original Biblical bad girl and primal woman. And few have as many faces. She has posed as the definitive femme fatale and temptress of Western art and literature, the Bible’s original sinner and siren of paradise lost. As such, she has been the focus and symbol of much misogyny – although without her role in it, there’d be no Bible. The words Margaret Atwood gave her fairy tale villainess could well be said by Eve – “I’m the plot, babe, and don’t ever forget it.”

Of course, as the iconoclastic Camille Paglia has noted, the Biblical story of Eden at least gave her a male accomplice in the serpent. However, even this has been reversed in Western art (notably during the Renaissance), which has even given the serpent Eve’s face – and breasts! That’s some deep Freudian kind of mixed-up right there. Although there’s something else equally as mixed up (albeit not quite so much in the Freudian sense) that’s easily overlooked which is implicit in the very bible narrative itself – the serpent had legs! (God curses it to crawl on its belly as punishment for its crime). If I came across a walking talking snake, I’d listen to whatever it said too – and quite frankly, the whole Garden of Eden set up smacks of a classic two-man con played by God and the serpent.

She has also posed as s€xual temptress, the naked woman for all seasons. Religious tradition saw Eve and Adam as models of physical perfection, befitting those shaped by God’s hand as opposed to those born into this world (or the reality of our ancestral African hominids). And although the Garden of Eden is a tangled jungle of symbolism (that deserves its own list), let’s not forget the steamy sexual symbolism of original sin. There is the temptation itself – Eve is tempted by the phallic serpent and Adam is tempted by the lush fruit offered to him by Eve (in the words of John Milton, “emparadis’d in each other’s arms”). And then there are the consequences – consciousness of their naked state of nature, Eve is punished by the pains of labor, and Adam is punished by the pains of a different labor, working the earth to feed his family. To paraphrase Kurt Vonnegut, it all smells of apple juice…

Finally, she has posed for those who would reclaim her as a figure of female power or even divinity – Promethean heroine plucking the knowledge of humanity from divinely imposed ignorance or goddess of paradise and mother of life. Some have seen the myth of a fall from paradise as an echo of each of our own experience of prenatal bliss (or at least childhood) – we all fall from the womb into the world. All hail Eve, God the Mother! She is the goddess and this is her body.

 

RATING: 5 STARS*****

S-TIER (GODDESS TIER)

*

Helen of Troy as portrayed by Diane Kruger in the 2004 Troy film

*

(2) CLASSICAL: HELEN OF TROY

 

When it comes to girls of mythology, for me every other mythology is simply outgunned by classical mythology – and foremost among the female figures of classical mythology is Helen of Troy. I mean, come on – they fought a war for her! Greece’s greatest heroes fought the Trojan War for ten years – and in the end Troy burned – for her. Also, as an acronym, she’s H.o.T.

Apart from Eve, she is the other definitive femme fatale of Western art and literature – without her, there would be no Iliad or Odyssey, the epic heart of classical literature and rosy-fingered dawn of Western literature. And at the end of the war, when her husband Menelaus went with sword in hand to kill her for ten years of adultery, he had only to gaze at her as she dropped the robe from her shoulder and the sword fell from his hand.

Her legend has continued to enrapture throughout history, even occasionally tempting Christianity. The apostles had to compete with the cult of Simon Magus, who toured with his showgirl Helen of Troy, posing as an incarnation of the eternal feminine. And Christopher Marlowe’s Faust famously marveled at his Helen of Troy, one of hell’s temptations to seal the demonic pact for his soul – “Is this the face that launched a thousand ships?” Of course, he burned for her as well. Such is Helen of Troy

 

RATING: 5 STARS*****

S-TIER (GODDESS TIER)

*

Aphrodite in her standard design art from her Smite video game profile

*

(1) CLASSICAL: APHRODITE VENUS

*

Is there any contest? Greek Aphrodite (Roman Venus) is the archetypal goddess of love and beauty – born of the morning star, the sea’s foam and the world’s desire. Her very name gives us aphrodisiac and her planetary sign for Venus is the universal symbol for the female sex. And there’s a reason that female figures in art are often labeled Venus – and that Aphrodite or Venus herself has been the predominant female figure in art, particularly for nudes, with perhaps the most iconic being that by Botticelli.

The Olympian goddesses Athena and Hera were foolish enough to compete against her for the prize of the golden apple inscribed “to the most beautiful”. No contest – the gods appointed Trojan prince Paris as the judge and he awarded it to Aphrodite. (He then took Helen as his reward and the rest is mythic history – the Trojan War).

In addition, Aphrodite and her Roman counterpart Venus had a plethora of aspects denoted by epithets which could well be a top ten all of their own – with the dualism of the ‘higher’ Aphrodite Ourania and the ‘lower’ (or dirtier) Aphrodite Pandemos being perhaps the most well known. Although I’ll always have a soft spot for Aphrodite or Venus Kallipygos – the Aphrodite or Venus “of the beautiful buttocks”. Baby got back!

Mighty Aphrodite! She is the goddess!

 

RATING: 5 STARS*****

S-TIER (GODDESS TIER)

*

*

TOP 10 GIRLS OF MYTHOLOGY: TIER LIST

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S-TIER (GODDESS TIER)

(1) CLASSICAL: APHRODITE VENUS

(2) CLASSICAL: HELEN OF TROY

(3) BIBLICAL: EVE

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A-TIER (TOP TIER)

(4) EGYPTIAN: ISIS

(5) BABYLO-SUMERIAN: ISHTAR INANNA

(6) NORSE: FREYA

(7) CELTIC (ARTHURIAN): MORGANA LE FAY

(8) HINDU: KALI

(9) NATIVE AMERICAN (LAKOTA): WHITE BUFFALO CALF WOMAN

(10) AFRO-AMERICAN (VOODOO): ERZULIE FREDA DAHOMEY

Top Tens – History: Top 10 History Books (Honorable Mention: Roman History)

 

 

ANTHONY KALDELLIS –

THE NEW ROMAN EMPIRE: A HISTORY OF BYZANTIUM (2023) 

 

The history of the eastern Roman Empire – from founding to fall of Constantinople, with more than a millennium of history in between them.

By the fall of Constantinople to the Ottomans in 1453 AD – on the threshold of the Spanish discovery of the Americas and marking the start of the early modern period – the empire was effectively reduced to the city itself with some spare change left behind in the couch in the Peloponnese.

It had come a long way – and fallen so far – from its glorious founding as new imperial capital from the former city of Byzantium by Constantine in 330 AD, reigning as sole emperor over the whole classical Roman empire. From that point the empire was almost inevitably destined to be divided (again) into western and eastern halves, with the latter ruled from Constantinople and almost inevitably destined to outlast the former.

The founding of Constantinople and its rule over the eastern empire that became the sole empire once its western counterpart fell prompts consideration of what to call that empire, which is addressed from the outset of the book – and in its title.

It was of course, as they considered themselves to be, the continuation of the Roman Empire, but it also had important distinctions from the former classical empire – distinctions that allowed it to endure as long as it did and not merely as a “pale facsimile of classical Rome” but “a vigorous state of its own, inheritor of many of Rome’s features, and a vital node in the first truly globalized world”.

Western history has borrowed from Constantinople’s former title Byzantium – as indeed does the book’s subtitle and its author as self-described Byzantist – to call it the Byzantine empire, often to the detriment of the empire’s continuity with the Roman Empire. I guess Constantinopolitan Empire doesn’t exactly roll off the tongue.

That is something which this book resists, advocating persuasively against that usage. While it is no doubt a term with an unfortunate history of usage, much like the general usage of Byzantine as a pejorative adjective, I think the title of Byzantine Empire may well be too ingrained in common usage to shake.

The common alternative has been to call it the Eastern Roman Empire – a usage similar to that of various Chinese dynasties to distinguish their geographical extent at different times, such as the Southern Song dynasty.

The book makes a persuasive case for a title as the New Roman Empire but then doesn’t really use that beyond the book’s title and introduction, instead preferring to use Romania – a usage that I don’t think will catch on for potential confusion with the modern nation of that name. Also come on – neo-Roman Empire was right there!

As for the book’s history of that thousand-year empire, it’s pretty much summed up by that earlier quote about it as a “vigorous state of its own” – one which endured through “innovative institutions and a bottomless strategic playbook”, the latter including what in modern parlance is called soft power and set out in one of the book’s many engaging points.

Another engaging point is that the book plays into my preference for thematic history, not simply chronicling what happened but asking how and why it did – above all, the question of how and why the empire “lasted so long lies at the heart of the book”.

That can be broken down into further questions, which the book engages. How and why did it survive when the western empire didn’t? How and why did it almost succumb to enemies after that, notably the Persians and Arabs when it came within a heartbeat of falling? How and why did it then rebound after those and other occasions of decline?

As to the book’s big question of how and why it lasted so long, a fundamental part of the answer is reflected in its preferred usage of Romania – that the empire transformed itself to resemble not so much subjects under imperial rule as participants in a Roman nation state.

A further engaging point is that the author doesn’t shrink on occasion from laying down some snide snark – such as when channelling his inner Procopius, he lets the occasional barb slip that he really doesn’t like Justinian. He quips that the Plague of Justinian was the only thing the emperor didn’t want to name after himself – ooo, sick imperial burn! Of course, in this house, Justinian is a hero – although even I have to admit he overextended the empire.

Less engaging for me is when he detours into the endless theological disputes in the broader history of Christianity within the empire. Yes, yes – I know the history of the empire is intimately caught up with the history of Christianity within it but my eyes mostly glazed over when the book went there.

Except for the dispute over icons – that kept my interest, although I suppose it helped it just involved the simply use (or prohibition from use) of images and not some mindbogglingly pedantic semantics. Also, there was the book’s insight that the iconoclasts were not as, well, iconoclastic as they were made out to be.

Even so, I preferred the book’s more straightforward political and military history of when the empire was kicking ass or having its ass kicked.

Top Tens – History: Top 10 Books (Special Mention)

Romanticized statue of Herodotus in his hometown of Helicarnassus (modern Bodrum in Turkey) – image donated to the public domain and used by Wikipedia in their article “Herodotus”

 

 

TOP 10 HISTORY BOOKS (SPECIAL MENTION)

 

History is just one damned thing after another – and one top ten after another!

So I don’t just have a top ten history books, I have a plethora of special mentions. And by plethora, I mean my usual rule of twenty special mentions for each top ten, where the subject matter is prolific enough, as it is here – although presently it’s a work in progress as I shuffle between all my book special mentions over time.

So here are my four special mention entries so far for books of history.

 

 

 

(1) PAUL JOHNSON –

MODERN TIMES: A HISTORY OF THE WORLD FROM THE 1920S TO THE 1980S (1983)

 

“A latter day Mencken, Johnson is witty, gritty, and compulsively readable”.

 

Probably the most divisive entry in my special mentions, in part because Johnson is without a background as an academic historian. Instead, Johnson was a journalist and popular historian – although it makes you sit up and pay attention when you read that as a journalist he interviewed some of the historical figures in this book, as for example he states in a footnote he did with Kerensky (obviously in the latter’s exile as former leader of the Provisional Government of Russia overthrown by the Bolsheviks).

 

In part that explains the divisive nature of this entry – but perhaps mostly it’s the strength of his opinions and the prose style with which he expressed them, both of which (as well as that divisive nature) were reflected in this book.

.

Yes, yes – I know this book has been updated and reissued with various subtitles to reflect that (such as the one in my feature image) but I’m going with the original title.

 

It was the first book of history that I read from Johnson although afterwards I avidly read others by him as it was a huge influence on me in my youth. Not so much now as I’ve receded somewhat from him as I’ve perceived some of his more idiosyncratic opinions.

 

For example, I can agree with his assessment of Eisenhower as the twentieth century’s most successful president (although he also ranks Reagan highly, perhaps even higher in the later editions) but not so much some of the other presidents he ranked highly (or badly). Sorry, I will never see Nixon as anything but crooked, even if he demonstrated a certain amoral competence.

 

From the above one may divine his opinions to be conservative, of a distinctly Catholic and anti-communist kind – interestingly enough as he originally was left-wing before his ideological reversal on the road to Damascus, a metaphor I think he would have particularly liked given his beliefs and name.

 

Whatever one may think of his opinions, the virtuosity of his prose style was undeniable – perhaps the best of any of my special mentions, with a particular talent for turns of phrase and chapter titles, as illustrated by those for this book:

 

1 – A Relativistic World

2 – The First Despotic Utopias

3 – Waiting for Hitler

4 – Legitimacy in Decadence

5 – An Infernal Theocracy, a Celestial Chaos

6 – The Last Arcadia

7 – Degringolade

8 – The Devils

9 – The High Noon of Aggression

10 – The End of Old Europe

11 – The Watershed Year

12 – Superpower and Genocide

13 – Peace by Terror

14 – The Bandung Generation

15 – Caliban’s Kingdoms

16 – Experimenting with Half Mankind

17 – The European Lazarus

18 – America’s Suicide Attempt

19 – The Collectivist Seventies

20 – The Recovery of Freedom (in later editions – formerly Palimpsests of Freedom)

 

RATING: 5 STARS*****

S-TIER (GOD TIER)

 

 

(2) GEOFFREY BLAINEY –

A SHORT HISTORY OF THE WORLD (2000)

 

“The most prolific, wide-ranging, inventive, and, in the 1980s and 1990s, most controversial of Australia’s living historians” – that last epithet was for his commentary on public affairs, so naturally I like him.

Geoffrey Blainey is Australia’s leading historian – and the leading historian of Australia itself, coining the definitive phrase for that history in the famous title of his book The Tyranny of Distance.

Wide-ranging indeed – upon graduating, Blainey initially eschewed academia for the private sector as a freelance historian, studying and writing the history of a mining and railway company in Tasmania.

He subsequently ranged through Australian history, with a focus on thematic history “organized around the exploration of the impact of the single factor (distance, mining, pre-settlement Aboriginal society)”.

Of particular interest to me, his range extended to the “rhythms” of global history – “two centuries of conflict in The Causes of War (1973)”, “examining the optimism and pessimism in Western society since 1750 in The Great See-Saw”, the history of Christianity, and the “tempestuous” 20th century.

And of course this book – which with my interest in global history I tend to regard as his magnum opus, apologies to The Tyranny of Distance.

What distinguishes Blainey in my eyes, both generally and in his book, is his eye for theme – especially themes outside the usual political or military history to which history is slanted, particularly global history.

A single volume history of the world must necessarily be compact yet Blainey not only achieves this but also seamlessly works in chapters on themes that elude other such histories.

For example, a chapter on the historical impact of the night sky on humanity. Or a chapter on the conquest of night by artificial lighting. Or of time itself by mechanical clocks in western civilization.

Or such resonant images or phrases that stick in the mind like Venice as the Silicon Valley of Renaissance Italy – through its glass-making as the cutting edge of technological innovation such as lenses for telescopes or microscopes, which I’m tempted to add to the conquest of time and night as the conquest of light.

 

RATING: 5 STARS*****

S-TIER (GOD TIER)

 

 

 

 

 

(3) J.M. ROBERTS –

THE TRIUMPH OF THE WEST: THE ORIGIN, RISE & LEGACY OF WESTERN CIVILIZATION (1985)

 

Greatly expanded from the BBC TV series he presented of the same title, this book similarly looks at what is Western civilization and its titular ambigous triumph.

Roberts was a classic old school British historian – and by old school I mean Oxford, ultimately returning to his alma mater as Warden of Merton College, an academic title like many others that evoke those of a fantasy novel.

Apart from his academic distinctions, he had many published works for which he was hailed as “a master of the broad brush-stroke” – or in other words that thematic style of history which is my favorite.

That style is on display in what I regard to be the crowning achievement of any historian – a history of the world, particularly if it also spans all of history, as Roberts did with his History of the World published by Penguin (usually as the Penguin History of the World).

Given the scale, it’s obviously not light reading – but is demonstrative of Roberts’ style that pithy phrases from it still resonate in my mind many years after reading it. Roberts evoking most modern wars in the Middle East as the wars of Ottoman succession for example, or Romanticism as a secularized Protestantism.

Roberts’ style and mastery of broad brush strokes is even more on display in The Triumph of the West, perhaps not surprisingly given its origin in the television series he wrote and presented (for which prose style and mastery of broad brush strokes are effectively sine qua non for engaging an audience) as well as its shorter volume than his world history.

The chapters – corresponding to the episodes of the TV series – effectively showcase its presentation of “the origins and evolution of Western civilization, and the transformative challenges and influence it has exerted on the rest of the world”:

  • 1 – One World (TV episode – Dangerous Gifts: the benefits and costs of Western influence)
  • 2 – A Sense of Direction (TV episode – A New Direction: Influences from Ancient Graeco-Roman and Judeo-Christian Culture)
  • 3 – Birth of the West (TV episode – The Heart of the West: The Middle Ages and Orbis Christiani)
  • 4 – The World’s Debate (TV episode – The World’s Debate: Islam and Christianity)
  • 5 – Defining a World (TV episode – East of Europe: Byzantium and Russia)
  • 6 – An Exploring Civilization (TV episode – The Age of Exploration)
  • 7 – New Worlds (TV episode – same)
  • 8 – A New Age (TV episode – Age of Light)
  • 9 – History Speeds Up (TV episode – Monuments to Progress: The Long Nineteenth Century)
  • 10 – The Confident Aggressors (TV episode – India: The Ironies of Empire)
  • 11 – Responses and Repercussions (TV episode – The East is Red: China in the Twentieth Century)
  • 12 – A Sense of Decline (TV episode – The Decline of the West :Two World Wars and The Great Depression)
  • 13 – A Post-Western World? (TV episode – Capitulations: Third World countries learn the price of dependency on the West)

 

RATING:

A-TIER (TOP TIER)

 

 

Cover 2002 Free Press edition

 

(4) FELIPPE FERNANDEZ-ARMESTO –

CIVILIZATIONS: CULTURE, AMBITION & THE TRANSFORMATION OF NATURE (2000)

 

A book on the suject of human civilization – or rather, civilizations, arranged by environment, consistent with the definition of civilization in the subtitle as the transformation of nature.

The book essentially treats all human societies as civilization, or at least a civilization – eschewing attempts at ‘checklist’ of criteria that define a civilization, given the problems of previous attempts to do so for any that are universally agreed, instead looking at human societies in classic Toynbee terms of challenge and response to their natural environments, at least in origin.

While such an approach may have flaws in its lack of distinction between a ‘civilization’ and other human societies, the book does have much to offer from its thematic history of human civilization from a geographic and environmental perspective.

Firstly, it vividly impresses on you the extent to which human history and societies have been shaped by nature, at least in origin – including the most basic or stark features which one might otherwise overlook from a different thematic perspective.

This is most striking when it looks at those environments it groups together as the wasteland, worlds of ice or sand deserts, which can only support the most minimalist societies – minimalist that is, beyond surviving in them, prompting to mind the lines from the poem “Australia” by A.D. Hope, about men whose boast is not “we live” but “we survive”.

Perhaps its most insightful feature – which it states in its introduction – was its comparative history of civilizations, “arranged environment by environment, rather than period by period or society by society”, thus yielding comparisons across time and space that might not otherwise occur to the reader.

The evocative part and chapter headings (or subheadings) illustrate those environmental classifications:

  • Part 1: The Wasteland – Ice Worlds & Tundra, Deserts of Sand
  • Part 2: Leave of Grass – Prairie & Grassy Savannah, the Eurasian Steppe (the Highway of Civilization)
  • Part 3: Under the Rain – Postglacial & Temperate Woodland, Tropical Lowlands
  • Part 4: The Shining Fields of Mud (alluvial or river floodplains in the ancient Near East, China and India)
  • Part 5: The Mirrors of Sky – the Highland Civilizations of the New World and the Old
  • Part 6: The Water Margins (Civilizations Shaped by the Sea) – Small Island Civilizations and Seaboard Civilizations such as the Seaboard Civilizations of Maritime Asia or the Greek and Roman Seaboards
  • Part 7: Breaking the Waves (the Domestication of the Oceans) – the Rise of Oceanic Civilizations, the Making of Atlantic Civilization, and from the Atlantic to the Pacific – from the Pacific to the World

I was particularly fascinated by its comparison of grassland societies – prompting to mind, as such things tend to do, whether other grasslands might have produced the horse blitzkriegs that the Eurasian steppes did in other circumstances.

Or its subject of the oceans – how maritime navigation has been shaped by the distinctive currents and wind patterns of each ocean, with the Indian Ocean proving the most ”precocious’ for long distance navigation (indeed from the dawn of human history), the Atlantic being somewhat more tricky, and the Pacific trickier still (Polynesian island-hopping aside).

 

RATING:

A-TIER (TOP TIER)

 

Top Tens: History – Top 10 Subjects of History (Special Mention)

Franz Luyckx painting ca 1660-1677 – Still life with a globe, books, shells and corals resting on a stone ledge

 

 

TOP 10 SUBJECTS OF HISTORY (SPECIAL MENTION)

 

But wait – there’s more!

Yes – I’ve done my shallow dip into the Top 10 Subjects of History but there’s yet more subjects for my usual twenty special mentions, of course with my usual wilder entries the further I go.

 

(1) HISTORIOGRAPHY

 

The history of history!

No, seriously – historiography has been called that, as “the study of how history is written, interpreted, and constructed over time…it analyzes the methods, sources, biases, and evolving interpretations historians use to study the past, rather than the events themselves”.

As such, almost all things in history also have their historiography. For example, the decline and fall of the Roman Empire has its history – the historical events that comprise that decline and fall – and its historiography, the latter predominated by the debate among historians over whether it was decline or fall.

Of particular interest to me within historiography are historical schools of thought – historical works or historians “grouped together by common, often ideological approaches” or coalescing about theories or theses of history (which rival the subjects of history for their own top ten list and special mentions).

Historical schools of thought can be for history in general – the Whig or Marxist schools of history for example – or for particular topics of history. As I said, the historiography of the decline and fall of the Roman Empire is predominated by schools of thought that argue it as fall or decline respectively, such as the so-called Movers or Shakers with respect to the barbarian invasions.

A more contemporary example is the historiography of the Cold War – usually classified as orthodox (the Soviet evil empire did it), revisionist (the American evil empire did it), and post-revisionist (the Soviets and Americans both kinda did it or it was bound to happen between them)

 

(2) PREHISTORY

 

The vast majority of human history is actually prehistory – largely synonymous with the Stone Age, overlapping with the origins of recorded history in the Bronze Age or Iron Age.

Setting aside hominin history extending back over 3 million years ago, anatomically modern humans or homo sapiens go back about 300,000 years – so prehistory is all but one or two percentage points of that, only overlapping with recorded history at earliest in the Bronze Age about the fourth millennium BC or so, coinciding with the invention of writing.

Prehistory doesn’t end there either. The origins of recorded history vary by place from Bronze Age to Iron Age. Even after recorded history began in those places, the majority of places – if not also peoples – around the world remained outside recorded history or at least did not record their own history and hence prehistoric in that sense (although the term often used for the latter is protohistory).

 

(3) MODERN HISTORY

 

From prehistory to its polar opposite – the pointy end of the history in the present, modern history.

Well, I suppose you could argue against the first proposition. Prehistory is the opposite of modern history in many ways but it is ultimately outside history altogether by definition so ancient history may be a better fit. Certainly that is the view of school curricula (at least where I am), which tends to divide history as a subject into ancient and modern history – the intervening medieval history tending to be reserved for more specialized college or university curricula.

And I suppose you could argue modern history tends to have an event horizon in the present, with modern historians preferring to give some space of time – say, five years or so – for the dust to settle on current events before including them in modern history.

Modern history is somewhat elastic from the present. Sure, the present marks its ending point but when does it begin? Some propose the subject of contemporary history from the end of the Second World War onward, but usually as a subset of modern history. The usual demarcation is from about the French, American or Industrial Revolutions onwards – with early modern history from the fall of the eastern Roman Empire or the discovery of the Americas by Columbus.

As much as I love ancient history, modern history is my favorite – because of its pointy end in the present. To me, that pointy end in the present – ultimately identifying how the events or themes of history manifest in the present – is what history is all about.

 

(4) MILITARY

 

Yeah – this is the big one.

Military history is obviously a subset of history in general, but one that outranks the others in popularity – perhaps not so much among professional historians but particularly among amateur historians, history buffs, and hobbyists (including myself).

After all, you don’t get other branches of history with the same obsession over factual minutiae of battles, uniforms, weapons, or you name it – or sheer enthusiasm for re-enactment or models. Social history? I think not.

It also is the subject within history of most interest to people serving in actual military forces or indeed military commanders, historical and contemporary, typically to apply the lessons of the past to the present and future.

 

(5) ALTERNATE & COUNTERFACTUAL HISTORY

 

Yeah – this is the other big one, albeit one that is more fully developed and popular in science fiction rather than academic or professional history.

Strictly speaking, alternate history is the fictional one while counterfactual history is the, well, factual one, but both are concerned with identifying pivotal events and turning points where history might have turned out differently.

 

(6) THEMATIC HISTORY

 

In a sense, I prefer all my history to be thematic history, looking beyond a chronology of events or people to the themes of history – cycles and pattern, plot and rhythm, cause and effect.

However, this special mention is for history with a particular thematic focus for its subject. We’ve already looked at one so far with military history and my entries from seventh to tenth place are effectively different variants of thematic history.

 

(7) SOCIAL HISTORY

 

“Social history, often called history from below, is a field of history that looks at the lived experience of the past”- typically of society in general beyond the ruling class and political or military history

 

(8) RELIGIOUS HISTORY

 

Pretty much what it says on the tin – religious history or the history of religion, whether as social or political history.

 

(9) CULTURAL & INTELLECTUAL HISTORY

 

Again, pretty much what it says on the tin – history through the lens of culture in the case of cultural history, and the history of ideas or intellectuals in the case of intellectual history.

 

(10) ART & SCIENCE

 

Yes, there is actually art history and the history of science for those subjects, which tend to fall into the wider subject of cultural or intellectual history. Art history is the more distinctive and prevalent academic study of visual arts, usually at universities, albeit more for the study of art rather than history – typically as a field of study for artists or management of art galleries and museums.

However, there is also the more metaphorical level of the recurring debate over whether history is more an art or a science – with the evidentiary focus of the latter, particularly when coupled with archaeology or forensics, but also the aesthetic vibes of the former.

 

(11) BIOGRAPHY

 

“Biographical writings were regarded merely as a subsection of history with a focus on a particular individual of historical importance.”

I always find it surprising how much of history tends to be biography, even from the Greek or Roman historians onwards, albeit not always in the same way as modern biography.

 

(12) ORAL HISTORY

 

Most history, if not all history, originated from oral history in the broader sense as personal testimony (or hearsay). However, oral history in the strict sense is “the systematic collection of living people’s testimonies, memories, and experiences through recorded audio or video interviews.”

 

(13) FAMILY HISTORY

 

Again it’s surprising how much of history tends to be genealogy or family history – as it does biography, not coincidentally.

 

(14) COURT HISTORY

 

Yet again, much of history, at least prior to modern history, tends to be court history, in the broader sense of being written by the ruling class (as well as for and of them), and in the narrower sense of being written by or for members of the actual government or royal court, including its courtiers or officials, for the purposes of governance or official record.

 

(15) MICROHISTORY & MACROHISTORY

 

Microhistory focuses on single events or “small units of research” – asking “large questions in small places” and closely associated with social and cultural history.

“Macrohistory seeks out large, long-term trends in world history in search of ultimate patterns.”

 

(16) HISTORICAL MATERIALISM

 

It’s surprising just how much of Marxism is, or at least is framed as, historical analysis, albeit borrowing from Hegelian philosophy.

Of course, I’m not saying that it’s accurate historical analysis, although I have a soft spot for Marx’s adage that history repeats itself – the first time as tragedy, the second time as farce. That might explain how Marx’s predictions from historical analysis were somewhat farcical themselves – and how Marxists have consistently shown a farcical ability to be surprised by historical events.

It was Marx’s collaborator Friedrich Engels who coined the term for this underlying historical analysis as historical materialism – “that view of the course of history which seeks the ultimate cause and the great moving power of all important historic events in the economic development of society, in the changes in the modes of production and exchange, in the consequent division of society into distinct classes, and in the struggles of these classes against one another”.

 

 

(17) HISTORY WRITTEN BY THE VICTORS

 

I couldn’t resist special mention for this popular maxim as a subject of history – a maxim often used to dismiss “mainstream” historical narratives as those “written by the victors” and assert alternative ones, sometimes leaning into the historical revisionism or outright pseudohistory of the next entries.

It is however an oversimplification worthy of its own top ten list.

There is of course truth to the maxim (otherwise it wouldn’t be one), particularly when states with their own literary history conquered other states or peoples without any of their own. The classic example is of the Roman Empire but even here there were Roman historians who wrote from the perspective of its opponents or against the empire – most famously Tacitus and the speech he attributed to the Caledonian chieftain Calgacus.

However, there are numerous counter-examples, some quite strident indeed such as the Lost Cause of the Confederacy from the American Civil War or the memoirs of German generals for history of the Eastern Front in WW2.

The maxim is weakened even further by other factors, such as when states are defeated rather than conquered and otherwise remain intact with their own literary history – or with the increasing number of historical sources in modern or contemporary history beyond any sort of “victorious” narrative control.

 

(18) HISTORICAL REVISIONISM

 

A term that can be misleading as it can be co-opted, particularly by those in my next entry seeking to legitimize themselves, but is more properly “the reinterpretation of established historical narratives, often driven by new evidence, perspectives or analytic tools”.

 

(19) PSEUDOHISTORY (HISTORICAL DENIALISM & NEGATIONISM)

 

We’re in the weirdest and wildest parts of “history” now – indeed, I’ve a feeling we’re not in history anymore.

Historians distinguish legitimate historical revisionism from historical denialism or negationism – the wholesale rejection of historical events or foundations of historical evidence. You know the usual suspects.

Historical denialism or negationism in turn is only part of pseudohistory (often overlapping with pseudoarchaeology or even pseudoscience) that “attempts to distort or misrepresent the historical record”. An intriguing variant of pseudohistory is cryptohistory which is derived from “the superstitions intrinsic to occultism”.

 

(20) S€XUAL HISTORY

 

I like to reserve my final special mention for my kinkier or kinkiest entry – hence this entry for s€xual history.

Typically the usage of this term tends to be for contemporary individuals – often styled as body count in slang, particularly on social media – but it is also a subject within historical biography and social history, the former for historical figures or individuals and the latter for historical societies or peoples.

And when it comes to the latter, s€xual history seems to be something of a paradox. On the one hand, there is a certain general consistency for human s€xuality throughout history for procreation, but on the other hand, you can find virtually every permutation of s€x somewhere in history, kind of like a rule 34 of the internet but for kink and history.

If it’s a kink, there’s history of it.